I'm a newly wed. I've been celibate for most of my adult life. I just got married new years eve. My wife is slowly begging to let her self go physically. She doesn't try to do anything to keep in shape. She doesn't wear make up or dress sexy anymore. She spends most of her time talking to her best friend in another state but gets up set when I have an attitude with her. The only way I have an orgasm with her is if I'm on top and thrusting fast. Even then it takes forever. She has multiples but I have to really concentrate to have one. I have to imagine other ladies dressed sexy to even have one. She doesn't seem to get it when I throw hints to her about working out. She has gain about 20lbs. I buy her sexy outfits and told her that those are the things that turn me on . I have to practically beg her to wear them. The really bad part is the fact that she is very attractive but doesn't show it. What do I do?
Posted by anonymous at July 7, 2006 3:16 PMLeave her for her sister, that's what I'd do! At least have an affair, at least you won't have to imagine a different woman anymore!
Posted by: anon at July 8, 2006 9:26 AMMaybe we should ask Mr. Smart Guy, the 'Dr. Phil' of anonyblog, what he thinks. I'm sure he'll find a way of making all of this your fault.
Posted by: anon at July 8, 2006 9:47 AMStop throwing hints and start talking.
Posted by: at July 8, 2006 10:32 AMIf we start relying on the ' mr. smart guy' instead of thinking with our libidos all the time maybe after a while we won't need 'mr. smart guy' for simple stuff and 'mr smart guy' can actually get involved with something more worthwhile than 'Oh I am too confused about how to deal with my wife' story.
wives are mind readers. tell her what you want
Posted by: at July 8, 2006 6:09 PMgive it to her in the poop-chute
Posted by: at July 9, 2006 9:06 AMTry counseling. At this point that's the stupidest question
It's possible she's depressed and doesn't feel sexy no matter what lingerie you throw at her. Talk to a professional and stop asking the internet.
Posted by: at July 10, 2006 3:46 PMWhy aren't you comfortable with the woman you married enough to sit down and talk to her about it?
Posted by: at July 11, 2006 1:47 PMWell it's getting better. THe problem was she spent more time talking to her best friend who I found out recently was competing for my wifes attention from mine. SHe actually feels that she should have more say about my wife than I do. My wife is gardually getting the picture after I told her About her self. She has also started to be more creative when we do things. And for the the person who was assuming tyhings about me you have no idea what you are talking about.
Posted by: anonymous at July 30, 2006 9:37 AMOh and ity's not that I wasn't comfortrable with her, it was the fact that she would always be on the phone with her "best friend" whenever I made it home from work and would get an attitude when ever I would want to talk. It's getting better now than God.
Posted by: at July 30, 2006 9:40 AMI think she doesn't have self esteem. You as a husband have to help her to build up a high self esteem. By reminding her constantly that she needs to watch her weight or to look sexy, she loses more self esteem. You have to appreciate her and love her for what she is and then try to communicate with her about what you want in a very gentle and loving way (true love). If she feels special and loved, she will care about you, If this doesn't work then I think she needs counselling.
Posted by: Rose at July 31, 2006 10:30 AMI think she doesn't have self esteem. You as a husband have to help her to build up a high self esteem. By reminding her constantly that she needs to watch her weight or to look sexy, she loses more self esteem. You have to appreciate her and love her for what she is and then try to communicate with her about what you want in a very gentle and loving way (true love). If she feels special and loved, she will care about you, If this doesn't work then I think she needs counselling.
Posted by: Rose at July 31, 2006 10:30 AMI do love her for who she is. Non the less she started working out with me.WE both have a personal trainer.
Posted by: at August 10, 2006 8:47 PM