August 24, 2006
AFRICAN ADVENTURES
The spotted Leopard had been feeding on the bait for three nights now. It had so far consumed two impala and a babboon. It had become accustom to the unfamiliar image of the rough ground blind eighty yards away from the Acaia tree where the bait was hung. The blind was expertly constructed by Magogo the Singing Dancing Macarena Monkey. The Impala and the Babboon were sacrificed as bait on a daily basis folding like cheap suits in front of the muzzle of His Excellency's .375 H&H magnum. The Bear was a good marksbear and an experienced hunter but the Leopard would prove to be difficult. On the afternoon of the first hunt His Excellency travelled down the dusty Zimbabwean roads astounded at what he saw around him. Unbelievable beauty! Giraffe,Elephant and herds of Impala moving like schools of fish over the plain. Magogo skillfully guided the Land Rover to a spot five hundred yards from the blind and parked off the road in the bush. It was dusk now and they moved quietly into the blind. Magogo got his spotlight ready and instructed His Eminence to place his rifle in the makeshift rest with the scope focused on the Acacia tree where the bait was hung. His Excellency did so but failed to heed the Monkey's advice about setting the scope on it's lowest power. As darkness fell they could here the beast making it's approach to the bait. Suddenly the cat was on the bait and the Monkey slowly increased the intensity of the light.
"Shoot yo Excellency now!",the Monkey whispered.
"Goddammit",growled the Bear,"I cant see him!"
The cat,spooked by the light,disappeared into the bush.
"It's too late now. We gwine to come back in three nights. Next time yo listens to de Magogo. Yo sets yo scope on low and yo shoots de cat right through de shoulder! Straight into de boiler room! Yo got's it?"
"Yes Magogo. I must defer to you on certain issues of which you are an expert."
The next two days our adventurers ate and drank and only left camp to kill Impala for Leopard bait. On the third night they entered the blind again. The African night is mysterious,beautiful in it's prime evil savagery. As night approached the last bird to be heard is the Spoonbill,signaling the arrival of total darkness. The Leopard approached again. This time it's move on the bait was announced by the coughing sound of a frightened Bush Buck several hundred yards away. They waited. And they were naked.
Magogo whispered excitedly to his Excellency,"He on his way. Now Yo has got to shoot him jus right o we gwine to have a lot of trouble on our hands."
"Don't tell me how to handle this you insolent ape! And even here you will address me by my title!
"Yes Yo Excellency. Plea yo be quiet now."
The cat's arrival was not typical. He canvassed the area and was at times behind the ground blind causing His Excellency to draw his hunting knife fearing that he might be mauled. High adventure. High tension. The life the Bear loved to live. Eventually the loud sound of a bone cracking under the powerful jaws of the cat alerted the hunters that he was on the bait.
Magogo slowly raised the intensity of the spot light. The Kody,realizing that he had only a few seconds,fired. The shot hit behind the ribcage and the cat,without making a sound or showing any sign that it had been hit with a .300 grain slug, lept from the branch into the bush.
"Yo shot to far back yo Excellency." They could here the wounded cat grinding it's teeth some sixty yards out. Magogo turned the light off. "We gwine to sit here and be real quiet now till he die. I put yo ass on him. De res wuz up to you. I ain't keen to go out in de night lookin fo no wounded cat. No Su."
From the very moment the Kody pulled the trigger the wind began to pick up. By the time the Leopard could no longer be heard a lighting and rain storm unleashed it's fury upon the bush. The wounded cat could no longer be heard but would be impossible to find in the driving rain. They were in a dangerous situation. The Kody wanted to look for the cat which could still be alive. Magogo made the decision to abandon the search for the cat and make for camp. On the way back in the open land rover His Excellency commented upon the sudden storm. Magogo replied,"yes,Yo Excellency, as if we had done something terribly wrong."
When they arrived, exhausted and wet, at their Camp on the Gache Gache River Magogo retired to his Chalet to smoke coaxial cable. He sat,surrounded by the thick black smoke of the burning plastic,listening to the Hippos and the Lions in the distance until he fell asleep.
The Kody,worried that the leopard would be eaten by hyenas or wild dogs during the night,sat at the bar alone most of the night smoking and drinking vodka over ice. Occasionally he would stumble out to look up at the Southern Cross and marvel at the fact that all of the familiar constellations were upside down.
photo courtesy of Low Life Films
Posted by anonymous at August 24, 2006 1:04 PMBreaking news!!!! Some asshole has changed the password again, just when Low Life Films has a major announcement to make---Her Portliness Empress the Dragon Lady has been promoted to Her Extraordinary Portliness the Dragon Queen. In accordance with this, His Rotundancy the Dragon Lord has been promoted to His Corpulence the Dragon King, and the Man Behind the Bear has been promoted from Dragon Cub to His Eminence the Bearon of Dragondom. Stay tuned for more nepotism in the Dragonclan...
Posted by: at August 25, 2006 3:05 PMtoo f'in bad
her potliness the drag queen can go play wit itself
This is real news:
Post-flood city wrestles with race issue
By Richard Allen Greene BBC News, Washin
Twelve months after Hurricane Katrina blasted through the levees that had kept New Orleans from becoming a rotting appendage of Lake Ponchartrain, the city is dealing with the stench of another problem, experts say.
New Orleans is in a struggle over how it will be rebuilt - and whether the poor and working-class African-Americans who made up a large part of its pre-flood population will ever be able to return.
It is not the kind of racism that once gripped the United States - the racism of lynching and disenfranchisement.
Racist graffiti and stickers have been spotted, but "you don't have white people point-blank calling black people 'niggers'. You don't have overt, straight-up racism going on," Ted Quant, director of the Twomey Center for Peace through Justice at Loyola University, says.
"Some people celebrated the elimination of blacks from the community," said Mr. Quant, who is black.
Locked out?
Race, class, money and power are inextricably linked in the U.S., and the flooding of New Orleans is proving a textbook example of how they intersect.
"In the wake of the flood, a small group of powerful business leaders and developers - the old blue-blood elite - took it upon themselves to plan the city into the next 20-30 years," says Lance Hill, executive director of the Southern Institute for Education and Research at Tulane University.
The problem was that "virtually no African-Americans" had returned to the city when those plans were being formed, says Mr. Hill, who describes himself as a white liberal.
There were proposals not to rebuild historically black neighborhoods, which alarmed African-Americans, he says.
"African-Americans who were displaced became deeply suspicious that their homes were going to be bulldozed, their jobs taken away and their hospitals closed.
"There was a general fear that they were being locked out of the city," Hill says.
He says he believes the intention was to exclude poor people. But because the city had been racially segregated for generations, the practical effect was to exclude blacks.
"If you want to eliminate a high concentration of poor African-Americans by eliminating a neighborhood, you also eliminate working-class, middle-class, even wealthy blacks," he says.
"Class became race in New Orleans."
Chocolate city
The racial mix of the city has changed since Katrina.
A year ago, New Orleans was a city of about 485,000 people, about two-thirds of whom were black. Current estimates suggest it is now less than half that size and perhaps just over half black. (It also has a rapidly expanding Hispanic population as immigrants fill manual jobs.)
African-Americans are much more likely than whites to think it is important for the city to regain its pre-flood racial mix, a study released in June suggests.
Almost two-thirds of black citizens said it was "extremely important". Only one in four whites thought that, while half of the white respondents said it was "not at all important".
Mayor Ray Nagin may have been trying to take advantage of those African-American sentiments with his widely-reported pre-election comment that New Orleans should remain "a chocolate city".
Mr. Nagin, who is black, was first elected mayor in 2002 with overwhelming white backing and lukewarm black support.
But in the face of African-American anger at his support for rebuilding New Orleans in a way that might exclude them, he reversed course.
That alienated the city's white elites and forced Mr. Nagin to seek black votes, Mr. Hill says.
He was re-elected this year with about 80% of the black vote about 20% of the white vote - a dramatic reversal of his 2002 showing.
"Now the mayor has a vested interest in bringing back the black community," Mr. Hill says.
Soul of the city
But the mayor is not the only one who feels that way, according to Anne Milling, a prominent white activist and a co-founder of the community group Women of the Storm.
She says it was the mix of people in the city who constituted "the soul of New Orleans", adding that Katrina had, if anything, helped break down racial barriers.
"I see people energized by what has happened - blacks and whites and Asians and Hispanics working together."
She rejects the idea that the city is engaged in top-down planning that will change the community's racial mix - and says it is simply common sense not to rebuild in areas that were historically swampland.
"There is going to be a logical falling-out of places that people should not be living in.
"It's not that anybody wants to eliminate any sections of the city or any people who are indigenous. But to spend billions of dollars and lose it again is foolishness."
She says she hopes people who fled the city will be able to find new homes in safer areas.
"Everybody wants these people to come back. I am optimistic that we don't have to lose the character and quality of this city.
"That would be dreadful. That would be a sterile city and nobody wants that."
"her potliness"? Hmmm, there's an idea! I wish I'd thought of it. But then again, it could be her potliness that has led to her portliness...and trust me, it is not necessary for Her Portliness to play with herself; she has someone else to take care of that for her, and very satisfyingly, at that.
Posted by: at August 26, 2006 6:34 AMeeeewwwww
get a room you pervert!!!
Hey! This is the African Safari section!
Posted by: at August 28, 2006 2:11 PMYou can kiss my safari
Posted by: at August 28, 2006 4:16 PMIts Kody R bear greets more envisaged the cubes world its Arschloch. The truth can be only found, while the man announces Arschloch of Kody! You must become one WITH carried out sound to radiate, which carried too much and a network of calf charity envisaged of fruits becomes. If YOU find only then, carry out the this all truth knowing will you your clean worthlessness. The range with its would become outside. He your heart to come and you from your useless existence to store to leave!
Posted by: at August 29, 2006 9:10 AM