How do you convince someone not to kill themselves?
After listening, reasoning, and pleading, how do you convince them that life really is worth the trouble?
When they can only see the vast amount of obstacles.
When they can't see the fun, the joy, the rewards, the hope.
When they've given up on everything they cared about, even you.
When they honestly believe that there is nothing left, nothing at all that they desire, except to go to sleep and never wake up.
How do I show them that there really is something besides the pain?
How do you keep someone alive???
You encourage that person to seek professional help. That's all you can do.
Most people who really want to kill themselves don't go around talking about it. If they really want to die, they make sure no one can stop them, so they don't talk about it. Those who do talk about it are usually just looking for attention; so be there to listen when your friend wants to talk. Encourage that friend to see a doctor. There is no need these days to suffer from depression; clinical depression, which is caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain, is easily vanquished by prescription antidepressants.
Posted by: at January 29, 2007 5:26 AMMr. Smart Guy says…
You do not “keep anyone alive†although you may be influential in preventing someone from killing themselves. The desire to commit suicide stems from depression. Depression is a chemical imbalance in the body and can be treated successfully with oral anti anxiety or anti depressant medication. In some case of severe depression like those suffering from bi-polar disorder; a combination of several medications and regular consultations with a mental health professional are often required.
Often time’s people that are suicidal will express their inner thoughts to someone, such as you only because they are indeed looking for help and their normal channels of communication are not available. Suicide is not an irrational thought; rather it is an irrational act. It is very likely that your friend is engaged in the thought part of killing them self. One of the major warning signs that this thought process is complete and they are ready proceed to the next step is a radical shift away from the depression and discussion of suicide to a false sense of happiness and security. This feeling stems from the fact that they have made up their mind and accepted their resolution. This is the time to involve the appropriate authorities and intervene into their life.
I would suggest that you visit your friend again and write down all their perceived obstacles and resolve them one by one. Be sure to diagram each one in a manner that will allow them to see exactly how it is resolved. Yes, this seems strange but it can be done and often times leads to showing the one who has the concerns the reality of how simple the problem was or is. I would also suggest you encourage them to see their family doctor, perhaps even accompanying them, and making sure all these suicidal thoughts are exposed. I wish you well.
It is none of your business if they want to end it. You do not know what pain they suffer daily. If you want to help them go buy them a gun and encourage them to do what they want. People do not need idiots like you messing around with their plans!!
Posted by: at January 29, 2007 10:43 AMMr. Smart Guy: "them self"??? That's the most egregious of your errors in grammar/spelling, but what really disturbs me is your advice to the OP to act as his/her friend's psychiatrist with lists and diagrams. There's a reason mental health professionals go through so much schooling and training! To suggest that an untrained person act in the place of a professional is bad advice. An untrained person may very well do more harm than good.
Posted by: at January 30, 2007 5:02 AMMr. Smart Guy says....
#4, I would appreciate you putting an immediate stop to your editing of my comments. My comment above contained no errors until you created one using the editing feature inside Movable Type. I'm quite accomplished at spelling and proper use of grammar and do not need your assistance.
Regarding your comment about me telling the OP to act as their friends professional, I did no such thing. I simply said "write down all their perceived obstacles and resolve them one by one. Be sure to diagram each one in a manner that will allow them to see exactly how it is resolved." I see no reference to "acting as one mental healths professional" This diagram I refer to is as simple as creating a Benjamin Franklin T. Now lets see if you can figure that one out!
Hey Mr. Smart Guy,
If you are so smart why don't you use the editing feature inside Movable Type to correct the error.
I do not think you will be able to. Only the Admin has access to the editing mode. You are just trying to blame your mistake on someone else. Paranoia is a sure sign of a mental disorder, which you seem to have some experience with. You have tipped your hand once again. I do not think Mr. Smart Guy is so smart after all.
From Commenter #4:
Mr. Smart Guy, your accusation is way off base. I did not edit your comment, nor have I ever edited any post or comment on this site. I suspect that you are trying to cover your mistakes by claiming that I am the one who put them there. I did not.
No, you didn't say the words, "Act as your friend's psychiatrist," but your advice certainly seems to be saying that, at least as I see it. All I did was voice my opinion; I did not jump on you and I was not rude to you. Are you incapable of having a civil conversation with someone who doesn't agree with every word you say?
Posted by: at January 30, 2007 3:10 PMMr Smart guy says...
I keep all of my posts and I assure you that I did not make that error. I am man enough to admit my errors and you did indeed catch one earlier which I acknowledged. I also do not care to argue as there never is a winner. Please though do not put words into my mouth! I wish you well.
#6 I have no hand to tip. You seem to be the one gambling.
Posted by: at January 30, 2007 4:02 PM