The Kody silently slipped back aboard the Kody Sub.
"Magogo!", he screeched. "You filthy mongrel! Just what do you think your doing with Dooky? Why are you not in front of that laptop? Dooky! Why are you not stomping Magogo's guts out?. Front and center both of you. What's going on here? Spill it out. I've been delivering my rhetoric and oratory for two days straight and I'm exhausted."
Dooky, easily beating the ape to the response said,
"Gidday mate. I was mindin my own affairs when your monkey here tried to bugger me, plain an simple."
"Dooky I've been lenient with you until now because you are new to the Klan. So watch what happens the next time you fail to address me by one of my many titles. As for you Magogo, I'll be the one handling the buggery around here and I swear as I am my own witness that you will feel the full force of my extension if you don't have anything for me."
The Bear deliberately advanced to within an inch of Magogo. The monkey could smell the rotting flesh on his master's breath. He began to shake when he noticed what appeared to be a small piece of lingerie caught on one of the Bear's canines. In one swift motion the Kody unzipped the ape's battery compartment and starting with a growl that carried into in a shriek demanded, "Who and where is Lindsey Russell?"
"The trembling ape hesitated and began to stutter. "Well, see, dey was some problems wiffin de.....an I couldn't....
"Where is she?", bellowed the Kody.
"In Michigan."
"How many web sites does she have?"
"Three O fo Yo Benevolence".
"I want those sites hacked and shut down Magogo. This babbling fundamentalist and her band of fascist goldbrickers are the greatest threat to the free thinking world. If she has her way all of us will be out of a job and a place to live."
"Yes Yo Radiance. It's time fo de Dixie Chicks concert on Austin City Limits now. She done trashed dem in one of her reviews."
"You've got to be shitting me. That's just wrong. Let me tell you something Magogo. Those girls are beautiful, talented and successful. They represent everything this Lindsy person despises. She's just jealous I'm telling you!
"Dey also some evidence dat she have had a personable relationship wid de Arch Nemesis Indy de Great."
"Really? Well, he can't help himself. I'm telling you Magogo he's not particularly particular when it comes to sniffing girlfarts. Now go out and test the ocean water for girl urine."
"I done did dat", Magogo proudly announced. "Dey ain't nay even one part per millionth."
"Excellent. Now as I recall I assigned you to write some pornography did I not? This is a skill you must develop if you expect to pull your weight in this organization. Let's see what you've got. Hmm?"
Magogo handed the KodyBear a print out of his assignment. He sat on the floor nervously picking at his toenails and bunghole while the Bear reviewed his work.
"Your grammar is absolutely atrocious. Hmm. Good. I like that. Spooge Missile? Damn that's funny. Oh my God! You filthy bastard! That is truly disgusting! I'm impressed Magogo but the part involving the Giraffe is a little unrealistic. Pick a smaller animal. A platypus maybe. Now lay in a course for Capetown. There is someone I want to visit there. If he's not there we may have to go to Pretoria."
"Yes Yo Eminence"
"And Magogo?"
"Yes Yo Radiant Benevolence?"
"Put Dooky to some useful task. Get him working on a new web page for me or something. Don't just let him hop all over the sub banging his head on pipes and shit. I'll never get any rest with all that racket going on."
"Yes Yo, uh, Magnificence."
Posted by anonymous at February 5, 2007 9:11 AM"I want those sites hacked and shut down Magogo." Nice threat King Kody! So why not go after someone your own size King Kody? You are one lazy ass wife beating bastard.
Posted by: at February 5, 2007 3:08 PMFC: I must regretfully inform you that the Kody posts are FICTION, not threats. You see what you want to see, don't you? It's no wonder; after all, when your head is that far up your own ass, all you can smell is shit.
Posted by: at February 5, 2007 3:27 PMWe are all the same size on the Internet. The only variable factors are Intelligence and hardware. Are you suggesting that Mrs./Miss Russell is lacking in one of these areas? I don't think that's very nice.
Posted by: at February 5, 2007 3:48 PMThe first commenter is obviously a sexist and suspects Lindsey Russell needs his protection.
I guess we now have a site redneck.
Since when did Kodybear take a wife? I know, after following his story for some time, that he has had a few sows......... But a wife? When did stuffed bears start getting married?
First commenter should start his own fiction story. He has quite the imagination.
Posted by: at February 5, 2007 4:40 PMKody's limited and consistent story lines indicate a deeply flawed psyche. I would not doubt that he has an abusive relationship with any one close in his personal life.
Posted by: at February 5, 2007 6:09 PMYour armchair psychology is seriously flawed. Who are you, Tom Cruise?
The anti-klan's posts are the ones that are consistent. While the Kody storyline moves forward all the time, the anti-klan's posts are always the same. "Ban the Clan! Clan Crap!" The only thing that changes in the anti-clan posts is the accusations of deviant behavior in real life. (Every single one so far has been completely false, by the way.)
Why does the Klan post their Krap? Because it gets attention; because it gets your panties in a wad. That is the ultimate answer to your question of why they post what they do. It's just plain, old-fashioned juvenile fun! And you bite EVERY SINGLE TIME!!!! You of the Big Fat Mouth---YOU are why the Klan is having such a good time. Your reaction is always good for a laugh.
Your question is answered. Now, try answering the question I asked you: why do you worry so much about a handful of people who use scatalogical humor when there are much, much larger battles you could fight---ones that would make a real difference? Internet porn, prime time TV's sexual innuendo and drug references, the afternoon soaps' blatant showing of nude people in bed, advertising's use of sex, sex, sex as a selling tool---never mind. You never answer the question, although it has been asked so many times. I'll answer it for you: it's because you're weak. You're useless when you have to face a real enemy. You prefer to hide behind your keyboard and rage on while accomplishing nothing other than to make yourself look like a foam-at-the-mouth fool. In real life, you are nothing more than a pathetic weakling. Only in cyberspace can you dream of being anything more than a loser.
Posted by: at February 6, 2007 5:20 AMSo let me see if I can understand your words of advice. Your saying if I stop posting my Clan attacks the Clan will stop posting? They only post because it bothers me right? OK!, I'll stop posting for one day and we'll see what the Clan does, and so shall you! I cannot believe how naive some people are. But I'll prove my point. One day this week I'll stop my posts and magically according to you the Clans posts will get; cleaned up, not talk about poop eating, stop plagiarizing recipes, stop talking about stuffed animals, and generally learn to blog in a manner that is conducive to this sites design. OK,you are on!
Posted by: at February 6, 2007 7:30 AMBeaner-dude, whats the temperature down there in Mexico?
Posted by: at February 6, 2007 8:18 AMNow when did I say that the Clan would stop posting if you stop complaining? And when did I give you advice?
I see that one again, you have dodged the question I ask about why you don't take your crusade to a venue where you can make a real difference in the world. You've got the answer for everything---except that one question. I will assume, then, that the answer I gave for you is the correct one: you're a pathetic weakling and a loser.
Posted by: at February 6, 2007 3:46 PMI can feel the fiery breath of the Dragon lady.
Posted by: at February 6, 2007 3:55 PMNo, I have not dodged any questions. Wait and see!
Posted by: at February 6, 2007 4:20 PMYes, let's wait and see this pathetic loser post yet another entry that belongs in the comment section out on the front board. This trifling asshole thinks his/her entries are of utmost importance and therefore the Admin's wishes can be ignored.
I think the most important thing that you have to remember is to follow the rules of whatever web-site that you are visiting. When one is a guest this is important, not your idea of how the web-site should be conducted.
I am not sure how the last few comments relate to Kody, Magogo, Dooky and their adventure to Capetown. I am hoping they will tie these comments in with th OP somehow.
Additionally, Commenter #9, that would be "once again".
Posted by: Master Chef Vapor at February 6, 2007 4:44 PMI'm not sure why these pathetic stories belong on Anonyblog. I don't understand how Vapors plagiarized recipes belong here either. In fact I cannot say the Clan belongs here either.
Posted by: at February 6, 2007 6:40 PMNo one asked you to determine which entries should be posted on Anonyblog. It clearly is not your decision who belongs here at Anonyblog. Your insulting comment about my tasty original recipes does not bother me.
Your comment does not have anything to do with the OP. Why is it that some of you idiots cannot stay on topic? This post is about the antics of a bear, a monkey and a kangaroo while sailing to Capetown in a submarine.
Let's stay on topic here people.
Posted by: Master Chef Vapor at February 6, 2007 7:32 PMAnti-Klan commenters, you are priceless!! Please keep it coming. I laugh so hard at you I almost piss my pants on a daily basis!
(That's "Klan" with a 'K' by the way, LC)