Does it make you a bad person if you break up with someone else. And is it just me or is this what a lot of people ask themselves? I don't want to be the biggest asshole ever, but I don't want to be in something that I constantly question. I even feel bad writing this. And when it comes down to it I'm too scared of being by myself, going back to how my life was. I'm too weak to end it and to be on my own. Is my life destined to be unhappy? But I can't act like I'm totally unhappy. I'm happy a lot of the time, but I think a lot. A lot. "It's hard to be the better man"
Posted by anonymous at February 25, 2007 8:44 PMIt's so scary. It's like, am I doing the right thing? How do you ever know if it would be the right thing to end it? Obviously, you can't see the future, so how do you know there's not a chance that you are leaving someone that was really, actually, wonderful for you? Of course there are some cases where it is obvious that the abuse has to stop. But what if you're just not sure you're in love anymore? Is it okay to think that maybe there might be something better, something really, breathtakingly amazing out there? Does that make you selfish? I feel like the most selfish little bitch in the world. But why should I have to feel like that? Maybe you feel bad too. And maybe you would actually feel a lot better away, alone again. Have some time for yourself, to remember what it is that you love to do when you have the time. I am just one small little person, realizing that sometimes happiness might require a little self-indulgence, being a little mean, even if I don't want to.
I've always told myself "what will be, will be." Actually I usually said it to myself in Spanish because it sounds pretty. But anyways, maybe it's time to actually listen to that. Stop worrying. Be alone, because that's what you want to do. If in the end, you are together again, then you will have had everything that you wanted. If it ends for good, then you were right. Right??
Posted by: N at February 27, 2007 6:02 PM