I've got this little monkey in my head that likes to fiddle with the knobs. When I am listening to myself very carefully, sometimes I can hear the monkey saying things like "Monkey see enemy monkey! Monkey must defend territory!" and "Monkey see pretty girl! Monkey must sex her now and protect her from other monkeys!" Mostly, though, he's all about "WHERE IS MONKEY TRIBE??!!?!? MONKEY MUST FIND MONKEY TRIBE!!!!" More and more often in the past few months I have discovered that monkey is driving. I don't think he has a mental driver's license yet, he's a maniac at the wheel.
I hate monkeys.
Posted by anonymous at March 2, 2008 11:04 AMMe too. My monkey was charged and convicted for driving while impaired. He doesn't care.
The bastard.
Posted by: anon at March 2, 2008 7:22 PMmy monkey secretly invites people over to party that are not my significant other.
Posted by: at March 6, 2008 11:48 AMlol I think I love you.
Posted by: at March 9, 2008 9:54 PMMy monkey molested me while I slept.
I'm thinking of getting two more.
Posted by: at May 29, 2008 1:33 PM