My mom loves me & all but recently i've moved out of her house to my dad's to see if it was better here, my step mom is controlliong & i get this i hate lauren vibe from her, she doesnt actually say it to me but just the tone in her voice, she's always unhappy with me, & there's always something she finds to bitch at me about. I hate it, well i decided that i want to move back home with my mom & i told my dad & he starts flipping out on me saying i know why you want out of here, its cause you want to be ungrounded you dont want people watching you & emailing your teachers to see how your grades are, but that isnt the reason why, I feel suisidal in this house. I can't say anything to anyone with out getting critisizesd whether it's "Hey this works really good for your hair," I'll always get something back at me like oh yeah look at the price... Im sorry we can afford to be able to get whatever we want (Insinuating that im a sopiled brat.) I'm constantly talked to about my weight. Recently i've decided to stop eating because of it. & I can't do anything without someone breathing down my neck. I've been regretting coming here for the longest time. I've thought about killing myself, but i dont want to go to hell because suicide is the unforgivable sin. but i dont know what else to do. I hate my dad my step mom everyone in this fucking house. I just want my mom back. I just want to redo my whole life again. a little bit ago i did a myspace survey & the question said, "whats the one thing that helps you through your day." I thought about it & nothing came to my mind. Maybe i'm being selfish because the lord blessed me with this life... I dont know. All i want is to hug my mom. & be able to see her everyday. sometimes i think why do i have to lie? I cant not. its instinct cause i dont want to let someone down. I dont know what to do ive prayed to god for him to help me get the fuck out of here. but nothing has happened. maybe i should slit my wrists. I dont know. Im just fucking tired of all the bullshit in my fucking life. (pronounced all as one word)
Posted by anonymous at April 9, 2008 7:53 PMThis, too, shall pass.
I wouldn't want to be a teenager again for anything.
Posted by: at April 17, 2008 6:38 AMtell him that you hate your stepmom.
Posted by: at April 19, 2008 3:36 PMThe whole stepmom issue is truly a thorny one, especially when the stepchild is female. it's the whole competing for daddy's affection thing combined with the "you're not my mother" thing. Not to mention the "he had a child with another woman before me thing" on the stepmom's side. It's all about competition and the desire to be number one in someone's affections, and affection does not mean giving someone everything they want.
Look, kid, you made a decision to leave your mom and go live with your dad. One of the lessons a child needs to learn in life is that every decision made has consequences, and you must deal with those consequences. At some point we all need to leave childhood behind and enter the real world, and the transition is rarely easy. Learn to get along; it's a useful skill later in life. Concentrate on your studies and getting into college so that you will be properly prepared to live your own life, your way. You'll find it's not as easy as you think, and it will change your view of your present circumstances, hindsight being 20-20.
Posted by: at April 20, 2008 7:16 AM