Anonyblog

I HATE my life!!!!!!!!!!!

Ok sooooo for everyone ho thinks their life totally sucks let me tell you my story! Where do i start, ok we will start from the age of 3. When I was 3 my mother and father got divorced, and my mother lived with her mom and step dad, who molested her as a child. He raped me and I got clamidia, then a few days after he raped me my father kid-napped me for nine months. How is that for a start?

As I grew up over the years I was raped again at the age of 13 by one of my moms friends she met on the internet, then again by another one of her friends she met at the internet when I was 16 because I couldn't tell her about when I was 13. I was again afraid to tell her this time too I didn't want her to feel tooo bad or guilty, so I just took the blame and somehow made myself think it was all my fault. I was really depressed.

Then after she kicked me out when I was 16 and I moved in with my grandparents I didn't even know I ened up living with them for 9 months. And let me tell you it was a disaster! My grandmother was a drug dealer and my grandfather was an alocholholic because he couldn't stand my grandmother. After 9 months I moved back in with my mother, and started my senior year of high school and everything was looking good.

Not long after my senior year started I found out I was pregnant, and I wasnt sure who the father was. I found out at about 4 and a half weeks I got around to telling my mom around 6 weeks. When I told her she said dont worry we will take care of it you arent going to ruin your life. I had enlisted in the Army a few months earlier, it was my life long dream to go to the Army. So she made me get an abortion, I wish I never would have but........ I was going to be homeless if I didnt comply, soooo I did.

So I had the abortion dropped out of high school and finished it out online, and went to the Army after I had fallen in love with my recrutier. He was the most amazing caring guy ever! He listened to me and liked me tooo but, it was forbidden so we didnt pursue anything. We were however really good friends. So I went to the Army and went all the way through basic but then I got hurt, so I was being discharged, during my out processing from the Army I was once again raped by one of my sgts. He drugged me and another female and raped us. How freakin awsome right? Well he didnt get in any trouble whatsoever, but you know god forbid anything good come my way.

After I got home from the Army I met the most amazing guy he was like no guy I had ever met before, and I was still in love with the recrutier but we were really good friends and had hung out a few times since I was home because now it was not forbidden, but I was never going to be anything more to him than his dirty lil secret! So I got pretty into this amazing guy I was talking to who knew all about the recrutier, and how in love I was with him. And a week and a few days later me and the recrutier got down and dirty and I told the guy I was talking to. Dumb, but I'm honest. He understood and I didnt hear from the recrutier for a month so by then I was getting pretty serious wuth the new guy. He was completly amazing.

I am pretty sure you can guess what happened, I feel in love with him. We are still together but I still have feelings for the recrutier! We have been together fr 7 months now but........... This guy is very abusive to me. I must have a tattoo on my forehead that says go ahead and hurt me! Thats all that ever happens to me.

So now just in this week I have lost my cell phone because i let my boyfriends sister use it soooo much I have an $830 phone bill, I lost my job i went to go to work at my gas station and we were out of gas so I figuerd my boss would have us close, and he did but the catch was FOREVER!!!!!!!!!!, Then I left my dog in my appartment for 3 days and my mom was supposed to watch her and take care of her and didnt so when i come home today my landlord is at my house with the police. And I knew what for, so I left and went and sat at mcdonalds till i thought it would be safe to lgo back. When I got back my dog, all 5 of her puppies and my cat were gone and there was a note on the door that I have to be out in 3 days.

So now I am told i cant leave i have to wait for the landlord and the cops to come back, which I do. And they get there and now i have to go to court on monay for animal cruelity, i am going to be homeless and not to mention jobless. Then later on today I fuond out my best friend is having a baby with my brother. WTF!? what am I supposed to do my dog is in the pound with her pups and is going to be killed on thursday because my county dog pound puts down every thursday no matter how long they have been there? What am I to Do?

So I am jobless, phoneless, carless, dogless, and HOMELESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OHH and I have a boyfriend that likes to beat the shit out of me and try to kill himself when I tell him I am leaving him, he is diabetic and just last week overdosed on purpose because I told him I was done with him, and he had to be rushed to the emergency room? Can you honestly tell me your life is any wosre than mine please???????????????? I bet you it is deffenitally not!!!!!!!

Posted by anonymous at July 23, 2008 12:14 AM