I spent most of this summer saving a friends life as she tried to save mine.
I betrayed her, and tried to kill myself. She was in Italy, and only heard the part where I swallowed the pills. She almost died for me.
Now she's back, and she's fine. And I'm not. And now I think she's forgotten all about me.
I swear, by the end of this year, I will be dead.
And I won't feel bad this time.
there's no past, no future... just the now. as to how we can go on living, that's a dumb question. have you looked around lately? the cracks in the street are divine, your fingers are exquisite, just let yourself be, and then you won't be so unhappy anymore.
I am so sad that you left me. I made a plan to kill myself.
I wanted you to save me, but I couldn't tell you about my plan because that's just not fair. Instead I just cheered up. I still miss you.
nothing is real, this world is not real, just like dust on the windowsill
Nothing becomes nothing becomes nothing. And I am not what you thought I would be. How to regain life love and hope?
i have a crush on a guy who manages a chicken wing joint. i met him at a taste-of-the-town event. i manage a pizza place.
fast food romance <3
"I was missing you the moment I let go of your hand..." He said. I let him go without a proper goodbye, and we spent the whole weekend pretending we weren't attracted to each other but jesus, when he touched me it was just electric.
What am I supposed to do with that?
King Cowboy Bush rates with the worst leaders this great country has ever had to endure. He does not have the best interest of our country in mind when he sends our men and women of the armed forces to fight a war that he can not substantiate.
He recently stated that it would be a dishonor to the men and women that have already given their lives to pull out before the job is done. Is this his reason for fighting his war now? First he was looking for weapons of mass destruction and after finding none he changed his focus to ridding the world of terrorist. Now we are fighting insurgents. Mr. Bush does not have a clue as to what to tell the American people he is doing. It is clear to me that this war was and is for financial gain. He and his family are oil tycoons they are profiting immensely from the sharp rise in fuel prices. They will also profit from R&D and exploration of new oil drilling sites. Why else would you go and attack the part of the world that all of the oil comes from? The only other reason is to get his greedy little hands on the Mideast supply of oil.
Look at the vice president, he and his family are the owners of the largest defense companies in the country. They have and will continue to profit off of the blood of our brothers and sisters who serve in the armed forces. The time has come for Americans to speak out against this outrage. It is time to bring our brothers and sisters home and stop the killing. This is not what the Creator wanted for its children.
Impeach Bush for misleading and the lies.
Its rare for me to drink, and last night I had way too many ann for hours I was blacked out. I pissed off quite a few people, and dont even remember it so how do I make up for it? I am so angry with myself for doing that, and will not be drinking anytime in the new future, but what can I do? Appologise? I doubt that people who barely know me will just accept that. any suggestions on how to make this situation better? (was at a party with many friends of friends....blah blah blah)
"THIS IS A WARNING TO ALL THOSE WHO VISIT THIS SO CALLED "ANONYMOUS" SITE. CONTRARY TO WHAT IS SAID IN THE PRIVACY STATEMENT YOU IP ADRESS IS LOGGED WHEN YOU POST A COMMENT. SO IF YOU POST A "POLITICALLY INCORRECT" VIEW OR ONE THAT ONE OF THE THREE AMIGOS THAT RUN THIS SITE DO NOT AGREE WITH, YOU WILL BE BANNED FROM POSTING AGAIN. bUT NOT FROM THE COMMENTS SECTION. sO POST AT YOUR OWN RISK FOR IT IS NOT AN ANONYMOUS SITE AT ALL!"
This has to be the most stupid comment ever posted. What made you think that your IP address would not be logged? You remain anonymous to those who read your ignorant posts. People like you who know nothing about the internet should stay the fuck off of it. At least learn how to use spellcheck.
Read this very fast------
I AM SOFA KING WE TOD ED
Mr. Kody R. Bear will not be posting for some time as he has become a client of the Department of Corrections. What a shame for this to happen. Now I have no friends. I think a bad case of depression is in my future. It is a sad thing to watch your friend screw his life up and not be able to do anything to help. I think that I will just get drunk and try and forget about it. FUCK IT ALL!!!!
I find it so entirely tiresome to always be wondering what he's up to and who he's with.
Jealousy is such a dull beast.
If you have sex in the farthole be prepared to pull out some sweetcorn.
mb
If I had to have a significant other, it would be a dog. Dogs love you unconditionally, no matter how badly you treat them. Even after you've insulted them, talked behind their backs or thought malicious thoughts, when you ask for love, they'll give it to you.
I just got back from my trip to Africa and man was it great! First we landed in South Africa and while there I actually got to meet Nelson Mandela. He was a very gracious and interesting host.
Then we were on to Kenya. While there I got to see lions and elephants in the wild. A rhino actually chased the hummer we were riding in, but I think the driver prompted it to. I also saw a few giraffes and crocs.
Then we went up to Niggeria and saw the different cultures of people that were there. I actually got to visit and internet cafe and check my emails! Then we got a guided tour down the Nigger River. Man that was the funnest part of the entire tour. I saw several large snakes hanging from trees and lots of crocodiles.
We finally ended up in Egypt where I visited the pyramids and several museums.
Now I'm back to work! Too bad.
So I went to get drinks with a couple of friends (one guy and one girl) on Friday night. The girl invited her female friend who she hadn't seen in a year and wanted the rest of us to meet.
We're just chatting, and the other guy mentions the fact that we're going to Las Vegas for Labor Day weekend. I casually invite the girl to come with us.
Last night, we were hanging out again, and the girl mentioned how strange it was that I would invite someone to Vegas who I had just known for 30 minutes.
Sure, she was pretty attractive, but I thought I was just being friendly. Is it really that abnormal to invite someone along, especially if the topic comes up?
It always ends up this way. It's not the "type" of people I am attracted to, to be friends with, it's not the circumstances that set things up a certain way, it's all me, it's always me. Such that when she (or he), who is usually my best friend at the time, starts to get competitive and "wins" over a mutual friend, and I just back off in a sort of honorable, too-good-for-that-business sort of way. I bring it all upon myself, because half of it is in my head away, so I push everyone away and then here I am again, all alone, listening to weepy music and doing nothing about it. That is my way of doing things.
These terrible thoughts go through my head.. she's uglier, and less interesting, and whiny, and bossy... so why don't people like me? Am I less human? Am I a bad person? It's as if, living in this hole these few years where I have isolated myself, I have missed some significant change that happened to all other human natures, and don't have the ability to comprehend all of these superior people, who are human, and good and nice and don't think these terrible thoughts.
But I deal with it, until it happens again, and again, and again...
I don't understand why the people who shouldn't have kids have them and those who should (the financially stable, loving kind) don't get to?
I lost my baby the other day and while I was miscarrying in the waiting room of the doctors office I watched several women walk in that should never have any children. The one who was a drug addict. The fucking teenager who shouldn't be having sex in the first place. The woman with four children already who walked to the doctors office because she can't afford a car or a stroller for her two youngest children. I mean why? Why are they allowed to continue to have children and I had to lose mine? What a fucked up world.
I have a friend who is a confessed cat killer. He has a ruger 10/22. It is equipped with a night vision scope. He uses subsonic rounds that sound more like a pellet gun than a .22 rifle. His favorite hunting grounds are garbage dumpsters behind grocery stores. He favors head shots. I find them a little messy and prefer a shot that breaks the shoulder bone and then penetrates the heart and lungs or both,the theory being that once the shoulder bone is broken the animal is going no where in the event another shot needs to be taken. My friend is a world class shooter. He wins bench rest and freestyle competitions all over the eastern United States but I guess a cat on a summer night is more entertaining than a paper target on hot summer day.
so i think i have a bladder or urinary tract infection. and it's driving me insane. i feel like i have to pee all the freakin time. and when i do actually pee, it burns like hell. and there's some blood. i can't sleep because i feel like i have to pee badly, but i don't. so i just sit here, squirming. thankfully, i am going to the doctor in the morning. hurry up morning!
moral of the story?
never use condoms lubricated with spermicide.
I have been trying do do some research on the Kody Bear but so far I am getting no results. I did a upc product code search on him this morning(702211232309) and found that he was indeed listed. The only information available was his weight at .7 pounds and that his manufacturer was not known. I still have his original box which had Pyramax co usa listed as the manufacture. There is really very little information to go on. I know that he runs on AA batteries. He has a great talent for mimicry. He has a hard on for Magogo the Singing Dancing Macarena Monkey. He has aspirations of world domination. He is fond of Internet forums. He considers himself a great ruler. The Bear recently showed up in South Florida and sodomized a friend of mine,Ken Pangborn. Ken has hired me to track down the elusive animal but I fear he may have fled to Zimbabwe or South Africa. If You have any information on this animatronic bear please respond.
I hate people who park in my parking space. It seems like it's always Mexicans too. I mean good God why can't they park in the visitors spots. If there were no visitors spots I might be able to understand why they were parking in my spot. But there always are spots two parking spots away from mine they can park in but they choose mine. Why? Because they're fucking lazy. Plain and Simple. They're cleaning out a apartment right near my spot. So they park their stupid dinky meximobile in my spot so they don't have to walk their lazy asses ten more feet than they have to. So then I have to park in visitors and frankly that wouldn't be a problem for me if this place wasn't know for the ability for those who park in visitors to come out with a car either dented or the paint taken off the side. My parking space is not close to my apartment so it's not about convience or walking distance it's about keeping my car from looking like their piss of shit. They'll be pissed today though. Cause I didn't have to go into work today. So they'll have to walk ten more feet than they wanted to. I bet they can't even read english yet alone understand that they can't park there willy nilly. But what can you do?
Back in the day there was this great anonymous bolg site named BitchAboutstuff.com. What a fun place that was. All kinds of intelligent people would post their thoughts at this site. There are too many to remember them all but a few are, 16 year old black girl, Fokker, Dragonlady, KodyBear, Dr. Funkinstien, the list goes on but my memory fails me. I wish that a few if not all of my friends could find this site and pick up where we left off. I miss the racist remarks, the gay bashing and the varied political viewpoints posted at this once great blog site. I hope this site will rise to the great stature of BitchAboutStuff.com one day. Until then I will have to be satisfied with this boring site and its lifelessness.
Do you ever just have one of those days where you just can't seem to win no matter what you do? I am having one of those days, as a matter of fact I am having one of those kind of months. I feel like a dark cloud has decided to place itself over my head, and I keep waiting for the sun to creep through I hope it does before I start to lose it and go insane. It's not really that bad, but it sure does feel like it lately. Thanks for listening/reading!
so its the 4th of august and i still dont know what the fuck to do with my life. i feel so trapped sometimes. here i was a few years ago making $120k a year in a cushy ad job but hated it so much at the same time. all i did was snort cocaine and search for sex in chat rooms. so i pursued my life long dream of becoming a sculptor. i left the big city, got married, bought a house and bought some rental properties. all should be great right? wrong. turns out i have a cocaine and sex addiction. so i joined alcaholics anonymous (aa) and sex & love addicts anonymous (slaa). now my wife and i have our issues. she feels as though i am not the person she married--'whats with these addictions' she's thinking. well, her mom is an alcoholic and her dad is a shopaholic. i think she married what felt familiar. yet she is still resistant to facing herself and her own issues. she can be so emotionally withdrawnat times its scary. i can feel so fucking alone yet she's just in the next room!
i know i have my shit to deal with--i can be so fucking co-dependant at times. but money is such a fucking isuue in our lives. so she agreed to pay most of the bills for the next 6 month so i can do my art without any hassle. you may be thinking-what about the money from the rental properties? i'm still in the red with those. it will take another year or so to turn a profit.
part of me thinks pursuing my life as a sculptor is futile at this point. to get the acclaim and success i need will take too long and i' m too old to old at this point. i'm in my mid 30's. but i thought doing my art was going to make me happy. turns out the grass wasn't greener. it's me that is the problem. not my career. my self esteem was tied into what i earned and not into my values. this year i made $3000 so far. i never made so little. well, the year isnt over.
some days i just want to kill myself. it all seems so meaningless yet so stressful.
couples therapy isnt working.
i think my ad career is over. i've been looking for work with no luck. so then i tried selling real estate. hate it. plus it fucking hard work!! and the truth is it's cut throat. thats not what i want. i just need something part time--something to make 20k or 30k a year. something that will still leave me time to do my art.
i just got a dog. she's so happy to have me and she's great company too.
i dont know what writing this will do. i don't feel better. i just feel like i'm wasting more time.
i'll end this with a 'God grant me the serenity to accept the things i can not change. the courage to change the things i can, and the wisdom to know the difference.'
Everybody is so worried about the Far East and all, what about the real sickos here in America. In one southern state the government is taking all the mental patients off their medication all at once and we are about to have a sicko revolution on our bloody hands. They caught one in the mall the other day masturbating in front of the toy store but the mental people could easily be shooting inside a gun store! He even through his semen on a 5 year old little boy and it got into the boys mouth!
Next thing you know the sicko ladies off their meds will be playing slingshot with their bloody tampons in the schoolyard. As a matter of fact one lady off her meds has already escaped from a mental facility by seducing an old man volunteer and they were caught at a Motel 6 where she had him tied up and castrated.
I would much rather die by nuclear bomb than have one of these off their medication weirdos get hold of me or my kids.
Monkey is a meanie. He swings by his balls. I used to take little white things but now I just calls. Hoobie hoobie freekie froe, yo momma is a mean o' ho. why is my mind so gray, I am not even gay. pick your nose between your toes, that is how my garden grows. You okay, i'm not k. My hair is turning gray. Lik my butt, tell me whut, you are just a chicken squt. hu hu hu hu hu hu hu
My vagina is very large and cavernous. Even the largest men must tie their leg to a tree trunk to keep from falling in. What should I do?