Anonyblog

Finally people are getting wise

Agree with below. Things are getting better and we are back to kodyboy being the only one who replies to his own posts.

Garbage in - Garbage out

As Kody and Indy continue to spue their vile toxins I thought it rather humorous to note their final hours here at anonyblog. Tick tick tick tick tick.

smoke for breakfest

wake in the morning
my eyes shinning red
i reached over to my bong
knowing that is was wrong
i packed the bong piece
my eyes suddenly glowed green
the crystals shinning as the flame reached
i pulled in
filling my body with the good smoke of happiness
one big hit and my eyes
changed like a traffic light
GREEN, YELLOW, RED!!
umm what a way to start my day

Kronic Stoner

Defeating the Deleter

Defeating the Deleter: Simply copy and paste your post into the first comment. All you need to do then is reply to deleted posts based on the date and time posted. Sure, it's a tad bit more effort, but it's worth it if you have something to "get off your chest." It'll piss off Mr. FATMouth, too.

Vaporware

Vaporware is-
Tie-dye tee shirts of various colors and designs, Drawstring pants, bandanas, heavy gauge pierced ear ware and Teva sandals.
Thank You,
Vapor

Mr. Magoogo we understand that you are now pursuing a career in Hollywood?

Oh Yass! Wid my experience at Low Life Films I thinks I can gets a gig here. Dats Magogo by de way. Not Magoogo!

How do you feel about the loss of your military career?

I don't care. Cletus Astopholes will do a fine job fo de KodyBear. I will pursue my acting career and guide de big cat hunts fo His Excellency on de side.

Are you acquainted with Leroy Cleotes Washington?

Oh yas! He an agent of de His Excellency. His Excellency know every move Indy De Great make.

How do you fell about Mr. Foaming at the Mouth?

Das moughf. We shoulds jus call him de moughf! He need to get his sit together. He in way ova his big head. He ain't gots no recources,no Identity o noffin. I think he is de post deleter iffin yo ask me.

It is rumoured that his Excellency Kody R Bear is going to be interviewed by Blogger Magazine. Is this true?

Oh Yass! De entities on dis site done make His excellency famous. Wid dey child like bickering dey done given him much publicity. Some say he gwine to be de next president of America. He already a self proclaimed god and I seent him walk on water one time!

Mr. Magogo you can't be serious.

Oh yas! I shows you de picture iffin yo wants.

Mr. Magogo are you happy to be out of the Congo?

Are yo kiddin me man? Is'e on Melrose Avenue man. Is'e gwine to have me a burger at Johnny Rockets. Den I will get me one of dem rock star haircuts down de street. Den I'm gwine to gets me some Ho's. Yo see de Mr. foaming at de moughf don't know nuffin about dis kind of sit because he ain't eva lived. He live in de dark. I live in de Light!

wtf

im NOT LOOKING to get advice- if someone offers something thats very kind and wonderful- its more just to vent. Isnt that what it says? "Get it off your chest"? Thats pretty common sense. I just like to get others opinions on what they think. After all, humans are in fact, HUMAN, right?

No Disrespect To You Third Source

I think this entity needs to choose a handle.
When crushing an entity it is better to know its name or handle.
Please comment.

Thank You,
Vapor

hmm

I wrote the "hod did i get here" bit last night, and i just feel like continuing based on the comments that I recieved. First off, thank you for the suggestions of medicine for depression. Although I am weary of it, I will look into it because I also do not think my depression can be cured by simple one on one chats with someone else. Second, telling me that a reap what I sow... I don't certainly make anyone else feel like I am feeling, nor am I blaming anyone else for my unhappiness. I am just simply not where I would like to be. Although I am depressed, I believe that I am a perfectly happy person on the outside- I'm not a "debbie downer"- I dont go around and ruin others days, or put anyone else in a bad mood. In fact, most of the time I am perfectly happy until I either go to bed or wake up that way. I don't look to be depressed- I have tried many things to fix it, so I just thought that your comment wasn't at all useful and a little below the belt. Also, I would like to repeat that I DO NOT BLAME THIS ON ANYONE ELSE. I never have, and I certainly never would. I wanted to know how to talk to my boyfriend about what I am typing now. He's not necessarily a jerk, I just think he has very limited patience where I have about 10 times more than the average person. I would never take a problem out on anyone else or place blame on anyone else for one of my issues. True, he doesn't sound like a prince charming right now, and if he would ever like to be considered one by me, then he would have a lot of changing to do. Therefore, I am going to start with myself and put my depression at the top of my "things to conquer" list. So thank you, for the first person who commented my other blog- you gave me a lot of good advice and were very mature about it, and I appreciate that more than you will ever know :)

third source...Mr. Ignoramus

Mr. foam of the mouth is rabid

There is no winner

Kody and Indy you two individuals disgust me!

You Kody hide behind the facade of a toy bear and monkey and fit every description of a pedophile that I have ever read. Do you Kody, deep inside your warped mind, your most inner private thoughts, do you disgust yourself? I'm sure you do! I'm also sure you don't go to work every day and share your disgusting thoughts. Are you married Kody? Does your wife know about your secrets? Do your children? Lord, I hope you don't have children because the hell they would be enduring would indeed be a horrific thing. How would you be perceived by your localsociety Kody if you did openly wear the "I'm a porn addicted pervert with a taste for children" banner waiving above your head? A bear and a monkey Kody, what is it you are fishing for?

Indy, you are even viler. Do you also tremble late at night when you face your own inner self? What warped images cloud the polluted dreams you have? Why are you always using the word "girl" when describing your foul stories? Is it because girls cannot defend them selves against predators like you scum? Does this double life you lead Indy get exhausting? Harboring and hiding your true nature becomes very tough in the real world? How many jobs have you lost in the last year? Most pedophiles keep moving Indy, perhaps someplace other than Louisiana?

I am experienced with your kind. My nephew at the age of 6 was lured and sexually molested by the likes of someone just like you two. That pervert is behind bars. I think someday you may share his address. During that time I made a lot of friends in the law enforcement community. Those guys have some great tools at their disposal to find wicked trash like you.

There are no winners here! Admin is running this site for those that have a legitimate need to blog anonymously. You two pieces of trash do not fit that description. Whoever the post deleter is, I do hope will continue deleting the posts you two offer. They are doing the site a great service.

Louisiana, one down and one to go, I am much closer than you think.

I hope my absolute disgust and the extreme passionate dislike I have for the two of you is felt in this post. Anyone who wants to read your garbage and fails to see you for what you are is ensnared in your lair. Please don’t bother posting your fake comments from your fake friends. The comments are coming from two sources and two sources only, Indy and Kody.

Mr. foam at the mouth (FATM)

Mr. foam at the mouth (FATM)

Is that foam or is that sperm?

INDY

I woke up today at 9 am. Manservant Leroy Cleophus Washington was already up. He rounded up some local pygmies to cannibalize, for we have no other food since Kodybear's Saniflush Kannons destroyed the turd-fortress (pronounced as one word). We have been wandering in the jungle. All of my followers except Leroy have deserted me. Leroy informed me that there is a certain tribe of South-African (pronounced as one word) Hottentots who have a turd religion, and they will likely worship me as a god. Their religion also teaches that the Devil is a half-monkey-half-bear (pronounced as one word), which should work to our advantage. So, today we beign the long trek to South Africa by foot. More to come.

How did I get here?

Everyday, I wake up and ask myself how I even got to thid point. I was once at a very low point in my life, where I HATED waking up everyday- where I wished I would just stay asleep because I thought that life was so awful. The only thing that kept me going was thinking about how it would affect everyone around me if I were no longer alive- how much pain I would cause my family, my best friends, etc. That was about 3 years ago. It took me a long time to get the "real me" back. I am thankful everyday that I get to wake up to a new day, I am thankful for a family that loves me and friends as well, and above all, I am thankful that I never once harmed myself, despite the many thoughts I had had. But, I am starting to feel the same way again. It's not as intense in the sense that I don't want to wake up or I am contemplating suicide, but I have the same feeling that I had at the beginning of my first depression- I fight it off almost everyday. I get in these moods where I just feel like I have nothing to live for, that I'm an awful person, but I have to snap myself out of it. I feel like I have no one to talk to about this. Seeing a counselor helps, but thats not the help that I necessarily want. I'm mainly upset because the one person that I love most in the entire world doesn't at all understand what I am going through. When I try to explain it to him he ends up blowing up at me. Pretty much any conversation we have ends up that way anyway. I just want him to be their with me. I think if I had his support I wouldnt be feeling like this, but how do I explain that to him in a nice way?

So what have we learned?

People, why must I spend so much time dealing with this site?

Let's review what we have learned.

1) Following the rules makes the Admin happy.

2) Kody, Indy, and He-that-dislikes-Kody-and-Indy are individuals. All three live in different cities and states. All three have deleted posts and/or caused trouble.

3) Kody, Indy, and He-that-dislikes-Kody-and-Indy have come to a mutual understanding and will now get along.

4) IP addresses, while they can be tracked, are not a good method of site control. Those with minimal amounts of computer saavy will be able to get around such control easily. There are alternate methods of site control, but I prefer not to utilize them at this time.

5) Following the rules makes the Admin happy.

That said, please play nice and we will all be fine.

Just Wanted To Know

Does one take a shit or leave a shit?

Please comment.

His Esteemed Excelency Kody R Bear

Recheck - Done « Plain text
There is nothing anonymous here Sir. You have my e-mail and as to the "vast amount of text" that I post-I have not posted in two days! Hell,I'm beginning to like you. You can come over to my house and **** ** ******! You are a lot like me in more ways than you know. You are tenacious. You will not stand down! Neither will I. I break no rules here Sir. I respect this site. I will apologize for the last fucking time for over posting! No more! You need to get off of my ass and find a way to post something interesting or entertaining yourself. I've got a great idea for something funny which I will post soon. It involves nothing pornographic. But you will laugh. Yes. I and my associates WILL entertain you! You need to relax and not let people like me intimidate you. You obviously posses some degree of intelligence. Use it man! Entertain yourself! Your life is too short to be worrying about me! What the hell is wrong with you anyway man? Can't you get it together?.

I Like you man. You having problems on the home front? I understand Women will drive you crazy. They will make you insane. Will she not allow you to give it to her up the ass? Forgive me but most women love it! Forgive me. I don't know but I feel for you. Don't come down on me man. I'm just the fucking KODYBEAR!

To "Kody Clan, I said keep your rubbish to yourself. Make your case!"

Double up on your Prozac and chill out. Why do you ask so many questions? For your information fantasy, fiction writing is commonplace on the internet as is hardcore porn. Did you just get your computer? If so, you will get used to the crap that gets on the information highway.
Children need to be protected from some things that are on the internet. It is your responsebility to protect your children. I do not know why you would view an anonymous blog with your child looking over your shoulder. Sounds like bad parenting to me.
Furthermore, things that you might find offensive might amuse others. It is not your place to police this website. If you do not like what you read here, then go away or read another post that you can deal with.

Kody Clan, I said keep your rubbish to yourself. Make your case!

I am posting these comments here as a new post rather than allowing them to stay as a "comment" under my post entitled "This is a repost of the post that was deleted below!"

This comment was offered by a Kody Clan member:

KodyBear and Magogo are the same poster.

INDY THE GREAT is not the same poster as KodyBear and Magogo.

Any comments or posts that reference the above are made by separate posters.

Any posts made connecting the KodyBear with links to pornography are made by impostors.

The KodyBear does not post pornographic image-likenesses.

The KodyBear does not edit-delete the posts of others.

The "Klan" is fictional and is not comprised of humans nor does it accept humans as members.

The KodyBear does not post pornographic images because it is contrary to His Excellency's code of ethics and against the rules. Sorry your daughter had to see that. Was not I.

Sexual innuendo? A common element to many posts on this sight.

Links? The only link offered is to the unicast forums front page and to the anonyblog main page.

Much text here contains pornography.

The only type of image posted by me can be seen below. I'll bet the "post deleter" would love to be able to delete that one!

The KodyBear does not post pornographic images.

End of Clan comments and now my response:

Wrong Kody! The vast amount of text YOU post is, as defined by law pornographic. You need to leave this site and go elsewhere with your rubbish. You have no valid reason to be posting what your posting, none. What do you mean you don't post pornographic images? What is speaking out of a "Pigs anus" mean to you? Quite graphical indeed.

Now make your case and keep you and your clan members comments out of my post.

Why am I a tormented person?

I don't understand why I am so tormented. I can be so happy if I only let myself. But it seems as though I want to be miserable and alone. I had the most amazing relationship and I just ruined it by cheating on the one person who cares about me. He loves me and wants to give me another chance after I stabbed him in the back. He encourages me to seek therapy and wants to go to couples therapy with me. He sends me self-help books. All I know is that I don't deserve him and that things will never be the same. It was so hard for him to trust another woman after his ex-wife left him for another man and then I just reinforced his mistrust of women by betraying him. He told me how I ruined him and how he waited so long to find someone he truly loved and how amazing it was to make love to me and be intimiate with me and tell me all his thougths and dreams. I hate myself. I hate the person that I have become. I don't know why I do the things I do.

This is a repost of the post that was deleted below!

Sorry but it is true! I have been the one raging and ranting about the KodyBear/Indi/Magogo (I'll call them Kody Clan from now on) posts for quite sometime. No, as I said before I am not the person who has deleted posts. That is just as wrong as it is for Kody Clan to post his stream of crap.
First of all I would like to offer an apology to everyone including the Kody Clan. I apologize for being so damn mean. Unfortunately it was the wrong trail to take. Perhaps this direction will be more polite and socially acceptable. Hopefully it will yield fruit.

To the readers and commenters of anonyblog, you all seem to want to talk about free speech and in doing so throw a blanket of endorsement over each and every post. Sorry, I don't see it this way. Allow me to explain what set me off.

I spend a tremendous amount of time on the internet. I was not kidding about my IT career of several years and knowing a lot about it. One night while visiting this site I was scrolling through the posts when my browser did a auto refresh and there appeared a horrible picture of a fecal smeared woman. I know most everyone here saw it and it was appalling. What bothered me the most was my 9 year old daughter had just approached me to give me a hug goodnight when my browser refreshed. She freaked out and I became very, very angry. My daughter actually asked me why I was looking at naked pictures of women. Thanks Kody Clan as you were the ones that posted the image.

After this happened I decided to look into the Kody Clan and what I discovered was this:

 They have posted here quite sometime
 They tend to post a lot of pure junk
 Their material tends to be full of sexual innuendo
 They love this site (I’m guessing due to a lack of moderation and anonymity)
 They have posted on other sites that offer anonymity

Here are some fact and links you may want to visit to learn more about the Kody Clan. Lets start with this one: http://kody.r.bear.googlepages.com/home his home site. Go ahead and visit it. Harmless right? Harmless enough that even my child’s internet security program would let her visit this page. Now how about those links he offers? Let’s check these out:

http://unicast.org/forums/topic.php?topic_id=266689
or
http://unicast.org/forums/topic.php?topic_id=55451
or
http://unicast.org/forums/topic.php?topic_id=266904
or
http://unicast.org/forums/topic.php?topic_id=266901

As you can see the posters are a clan. These are just a few of the disgusting things this person posts. Still free speech people? Yes, but was is this what free speech was all about when our countries forefathers wrote the constitution? Then by all means let this guy or gal speak freely in our schools as he anonymously hides behind his cute fuzzy bear façade. Society has a name for people like this, pedophile. He/she even refers to himself as “anonymous coward”. Don’t believe me? Check this out http://unicast.org/forums/post.php?forum_id=1&topic_id=266689

I encourage you all to investigate the Kody Clan more and determine for yourself if this is “pure harmless fun”. While you are doing that remember all the people out there surfing the net including the kids. Again, I say to you this junk the Kody Clan posts is not blogging. Blogging as defined by Wikpedia is: Blog is the contraction universally used for weblog, a type of website where entries are made (such as in a journal or diary), displayed in a reverse chronological order.
Blogs often provide commentary or news on a particular subject, such as food, politics, or local news; some function as more personal online diaries. A typical blog combines text, images, and links to other blogs, web pages, and other media related to its topic. Most blogs are primarily textual although some focus on photographs (photoblog), videos (vlog), or audio (podcasting), and are part of a wider network of social media.

Kody Clan I am sorry for being so mean and threatening earlier. I was wrong and resorted to using the tactics you use. Now I’m facing you head on.

Now, a word about anonyblog, this site needs a moderator. No, I am not talking about someone to delete posts that are questionable. I am talking about a moderator who moderates the site on a hourly basis and removes all items that do not meet the definition of the sites design or stay within the rules of the site. This means taking the offending IP’s and restricting them from visiting the site. I will even offer you my IP for restriction should you also ban the Kody clan. I really have no intention a visiting this site once this is over.

The owner of anonyblog is a Mr. Michael Pusateri from Pasadena California. Mr. Pusateri please moderate and administer this site. You have children and should be able to relate as to what I am saying. I would also think that by working for an organization that as profited for years from the sale entertainment engineered for children you would take this quite seriously. Your anonyblog rules while written with good intentions are neither adhered to nor monitored and are being trampled upon every single day. Please either moderate this site or take it down in order to prevent its abuse.

I have e-mailed Mr. Pusateri and invited him to read this post as well as closely review todays logs and find the post deleter. I hope he does.

Should anyone want to know more about Mr. Pusateri simply click here: http://www.cruftbox.com/cruft/docs/me.html

Now I should define pornography as it is defined by law: Pornography can be thought of as all sexually explicit material intended primarily to arouse the reader, viewer, or listener. Each category of illegal pornography has a specific legal definition established by the courts. The Supreme Court has said that there are four categories of pornography that can be determined illegal. Illegal pornography includes indecency, material harmful to minors, obscenity, and child pornography.

I’m sure you will agree the image and text posted by Kody and Clan on a consistent basis fits the definition. Therefore I ask you the readers of annonyblog. Is this what you want anonyblog to be about? Does this type of material belong here?

Please fell free to comment! Kody Clan folks I do not need to hear your rubbish. I have presented my case now you present yours!

It’s a shame, just when I thought everyone was becoming civil!

It seemed everyone was behaving, but there is still an a-hole out there.

Post deleter! With every click and deletion your IP is registered on the site logs for Admin.

The post that was here was deleted. It will be re-posted when I get to my other PC where the text is stored.

Todays weather

in Arizona is what? Anybody, anybody Kody, Kody?

Outcast.

Don't blame me for being oversensitive about certain issues. All I'm doing is reacting to the behaviour of you guys and trying my hardest to read in between the lines, because hey, no one bothers to spell it out for me anyways.

Don't you guys even dare to question why you weren't asked to join in any activity that I've organised. How often have you been asking me to participate in activites organised by you guys anyway? Things at this stage are so awkward for me its hard even just to breathe the same air as you guys.

I thought we were better friends than this. I thought you guys could just tell me about the problem instead of shunning me. I thought I could try to ignore it but apparently I can't.

Because of the actions you guys have taken, to exclude me, I have no choice but to read in between the lines to try and figure out what you guys want from me now. V says that you guys are trying your hardest to bring me back into the group, but hey, don't blame me for being over-sensitive at this juncture.

I have nothing else to say.

I summon the post deletor

Oh great post deletor! Please remove the rubbish! Yes, you may also remove mine! I just hoped to summon you!

JOB UPDATE

It is kwite killer kracking krusty kody krab, kwite kewl.

BREAKING NEWS FLASH

Track Trealer Lynne Is now Working At Pizza Hut.
It was seen walking to work this morning around 11:30

VAPOR

INDY

I, Indy, awoke yesterday to ruins. My Fortress had been destroyed almost fully with Kodybear's Saniflush cannons, and Magogo the Dancing and Singing Macarena Monkey had been liberated. My army of followers, in seeing our defeat, no longer consider me a God, and Chief Dingleberry has returned to his office as tribal leader. He has asked me, albeit politely, to leave the tribe and not return. Giving me copious supplies, he sent me off with the admonition, "We never wanses to see's yo face agin heeyah, Indy's!" All have deserted me, save my most faithful and loyal Manservant, Leroy Cleophus Washington. He has vowed to leave his people and never to desert me, and he alone still believes me to be a god. So Leroy and I have traveled into the Heart of Darkness, and have currently set up camp in a very remote spot. We are gathering our strength for a Victorious Return, but it will be a long time. Kodybear my archnemesis (pronounced as one word): you have destroyed my world. I shall rise again, so be prepared!

GOT A NEW JOB!

Yup, I've got a new job kastrating Kody krabs. Kody krab balls are kwite the komodity.
I used to klip buffalo wings. I was fired after krashing the kopter that we korraled them with.
Before the wing job I kut chicken fingers at the chicken finger plant.
My supervisor tells we will be prosessing kracked Kody krab after kollecting all of the Kody krab balls.
I am not sure if I will enjoy kracking krusty kody krab but it's a job.

KODYBEAR

In a unique world of fantasy,incomprehensible rulers and war-gods,His Esteemed Excellency Eminence Kody R Bear has overcome his most formidable adversary in the battle for possession of General Magogo's soul. The

KodyBear's campaign to rescue his General lasted only three grueling weeks,in which the battle grew to it's most frenzied and bizarre heights here last week. Through meticulous planning,a dedicated support team comprised of writers and photographers,modern intelligence and communications the KodyBear was able to fully orchestrate and effectively command the entire extraction plan. No losses were reported on the side of the enemy however His Esteemed Excellency suffered a minimal loss of twenty thousand Macarena Monkeys.

Your Excellency How did you overcome this vile adversary?

Through deceit mostly. I let it be know that I had a secret weapon and then placed a large blob near my position knowing that it would be mistaken for the secret device. After the next pass of the

girlturd satellite I simply walked into their encampment and freed the general.

Under what conditions did you find General Magogo?

He was indeed confined in a turd tower. His batteries were almost depleted but I could here the muted sounds of his wretching and vomiting and the occasional "Help me Daddy". Fortunately at this time the army was still intact. I called in an artillery strike from our Saniflush cannons which dissolved enough of the tower for me to gain entrance. Shortly after that my army of Macarena Monkeys was completely devastated by Indy's girlturd catapults.
Your Eminence how did you escape?

In the Kody Kopter of course.

Your Excellency,forgive me, but there has been much dissent on the home front concerning the recent war and we don't beleive that it has anything to do with the needless deployment and sub sequential loss of twenty thousand innocent Macarena Monkeys. Your regime has been highly criticized for the over abundance of news coverage this event has received. Do you have any comment.

I offer my formal apology.

Your Eminence do you harbor any speculation as to what INDY THE GREAT'S next course of action will be?

Well, it's really impossible to say. The only thing that I can assure you with any amount of certainty is that whatever course of action he pursues will all be pronounced as one word.

Finally Your Eminence what does the future hold for you and General Magogo?

Oh,by the way Magogo,Your fired! Your military career is over! General Cletus Astopholes will assume command! To answer your question,we're off to Zimbabwe to get my trophy lion!

Photograph courtesy of Low Life Films a subsidiary of Hallucinatory productions.

I be da finest monkey in dis herre town

Mia! 305! Fa lyf! Fa sho! Wut? Hatas back off!

Conservative myths

1. Conservatives are religious fanatics: Not true. Of course there is a small sect of conservatism that is based on wild religous views, just like there is a small sect of religon haters on the left. God loving people tend to be conservative just because these people also either are generally older aged, were raised during times of segregation, or are more wealthy then your average liberal. A majority of the liberal base revolves around young adults and college age students. Mostly because the ratio of liberal school professors are profoundly more liberal then the general population.

2. Conservatives are all about big oil…companies…and what not: While conservatives are supportive of big business, many do not have the money nor the public’s attention to retain any care about economics. The few high profile conservatives of the entire conservative population are known for a reason. Either for thier extreme political views or their sensiblity and intellegience. If every conservative had these same views, there would be no reason for these few to stand out from the rest.

3. Conservatives are Pro-Life because they are sexist: Wrong again. Other then the fringe anti-feminst movement members among us, our reasoning is just a lot more simple then liberals make it out to be. There is no conspiracy against woman or abortion clinics. The majority are just against the loss of a life (or maybe potenitial life if your beliefs are different.). Unless you were raped, you have to have the responsibilty to handle your own sexual promiscuity. Whether it be with condoms or other types of contraceptive, precautions must be taken to stop unwated pregnancy’s. Which would then lead to less need for abortions. Many conservatives also point out that there are many orginazations for adoption that have couples that are unable to have kids, but are very much in need for one. Why have an abortion when you could change someone elses life?

4. Conservatives are homophobic, anti-(put your race here), and anti-freedom bigots: Wrong. As many of the other myths already answer, there is of course those few that do hold these views, such as the KKK, or Neo-Nazi population. But, I think this myth was conceived on the fact that many conservatives are for higher border standards. While there are a few who have racist reasons, I for one am just for the reformation of a clear border. Without a border, we don’t have a country.

5. Conservatives control the media: I can’t even justify an answer for this. If you can’t see the truth for yourself then you have a heavy dose of denile on your hands.

6. All Conservatives are republican: Another commen misconception. Many times the names for the political spectrum (conservative, moderate, centrist, liberal) get confused and become synonomous with actualy political affiliations. There are liberal republicans, their are moderate democrats. there are centrist libertarians. Everything can be broken down intoparts on a sepctrum. Too often is the word conservative made out to be a dirty word for Republican.

Please comment! I cannot wait to hear form the left.

HERPES

ATTENTION!! This blog desperately requests any sort of feedback and thanks everyone for their comments in advance.

Here's the scoop-

About a year and a half ago my now ex- boyfriend and I broke up and went on a relatively brief hiatus. During this break he had drunken, unprotected sex with a girl who didn't know she had the herpes virus... Until the next day when she found out that her ex had it during their relationship. Ouch. But anyway..

My ex and I talked about getting back together until he told me he might have caught it from her... I got scared, refused to be intimate with him until he was tested, and sooner or later I told him I couldn't be with him.

**A year and a half later.. i.e. NOW"

I've just started communicating with the good old ex again and since then I have realized that I have never been more content with anyone else i've dated in the past. This guy could be the one for me. But what do I do? I'm pretty positive that he has herpes unless he avoided getting it by some miracle. What should I do? Is there a way that I can avoid contracting herpes and still have an intimate relationship? I need feedback from people about 2 things-

1- What would YOU do given the circumstances (guaranteed chemistry in relationship, great sex, etc)
2- Can someone inform me more about the risks and how to manage them?

Thanks

man-hole covers

do you know why man-hole covers in the road-street are round?

man-holes

do you know why man-hole covers in the road-street are round?

wiping your butt

Don't you hate it when you take a shit and the turd breaks and part of it is left in your butthole? Then you have to dig it out until the toilet paper is clean lest you risk a brown spot on your underwear. Sometimes I have to use 20 pieces of toilet paper and my asshole is sore and bleeding afterwards. I wet the paper to help this but lately my ass can hardly take it. Anybody have a solution to my dilema? Any replies would be greatly appreciated.

One last chance Bearboy

Bearboy I'm not the one who has been deleting posts. We know who is though don't we? It's you Bearboy, you and your little group of teeny boppers. Yes, you changed the password after you hit the site with your bogus warning crap. Don't even try to convince me or anyone that you happen to be "conveniently logged in" when the password was changed. You lie Bearboy! You know it and you have to deal with it yourself. Admin should police this site and find out who is to blame and lock down your IP. I know Movable Type well and can tell him exactly how to do it. I’m sure he does know however he is very busy. The problem is Admin does not want to admin this site. He, and yes it is a he, simply thinks everyone should get along. Normally that’s not a problem but when you have someone on a site like you Bearboy, constantly spitting diarrhea from several of your own warped personalities. Well then the site becomes polluted! Your posts Bearboy pull the very life out of this site. I mean all of your posts including your pseudonym posts from all of your demented characters. You need to eave this site Bearboy and start our own multi personality warped story site. Leave because you do legitimate blogging great harm. Stop and think about it Bearboy, I know its hard and may hurt. Ask your self this Bearboy; if you were into legitimate blogging (what you post is not blogging) would you want to post on a site full of photo’s of fecal smeared women or plastic toys? You have one last chance to stop Bearboy. One last chance, think you can do it? Try Bearboy because next time I’ll start sniffing for Cisco based IP’s and find your router. Then ping, bye bye Bearboy! Yes, it is very possible!

This is not hard

People, this is not hard.

Stop deleting posts.
Stop posting the same story multiple times.
Do not change the password.
Respect the rules of the site.

Until I clear the logs, I can easily see who the troublemakers are and who is really posting what.

Stop acting like children. If others disobey the rules, it is not your job to deal with it.

I am trying to give you all an anonymous place to post. I do not want to spend my time tracking down IP addresses. I do not want to spend my time policing the site.

I am asking nicely one last time before I take action.

KODYBEAR

I find myself in a unique position. I may be the only person on this planet with the ability to post on anonyblog at this time. Well you see earlier today I made my post for the day. I had the post reviewed and it was generally agreed that I was making no infractions in regards to the stated rules of the site. Our photo editor at Low Life Films put a lot of work into the associated picture and my reviewers in general agreed that the whole affair was quite funny and entertaining. So I posted it. Within a few hours the board was flooded with articles cut and pasted from various news pages in a ploy to push my post off of the page. It worked quite well however other posters were victimized as well-kinda of like carpet bombing. Then the post was deleted. Some of the Low Life Films staff,angered by these tactics,posted the multiple WARNING posts. Can't say I blamed them. You Mr.or Mrs. deleter-flooder destroyed their hard work. So in the process of composing this entry I received a call telling me that the pass word had been changed and that I was being blamed for it. Sir, I submit to you this is not the case but I was however already logged in at the time this vandalism occurred. I personally love this site and although I am guilty,for which I apologize,of excessive posting I conduct myself in a manner consistent with all of the rules. However the post-deleter-password changer-vandal at large continues to operate using guerrilla tactics. It disrespects all. To it all posts are equally worthless in it's campaign against me. I will not abide this. I have saved this post into my e-mail because I am sure that the deleter-password changer,the only one in posession of the correct password at this time, will delete this as well in an effort to preserve itself. I hope that through the identification of IP addresses,of which I know nothing about, that you will be able to find the truth and resolve this matter. I will go on to admit that in a moment of passion,in which I was not exercising rational thought, I deleted the flooder's before mentioned cut and pasted news articles. For this I also apologize. I am not a post deleter or post editor. Damn! Rather well written if I don't say so my self.
Sincerely,

His Excellency Kody R Bear

P.S. The idea did occur to me to reset the password back to the original but then I realized that,as with all such applications,that I would need to know the current password in order to achieve that.

WARNING…..WARNING…….WARNING……………….

WARNING…..WARNING…….WARNING……………….
I am not the Kody Bear or his poster, I AM A FRIEND of the Kody Bear poster…I have known this person for some time….
WARNING……WARNING……..WARNING…….The POST DELETERS are about to cause me to join in this battle….IF the POST DELETERS CONTINUE to DELETE the post’s of KODY R. BEAR AND INDY……Then EVERYONE will be SORRY
Hello people of all breeds, races, religions, non-religious, Kody haters, Kody lovers and people who don’t feel one way or the other about Kody. Let me start off first by informing who-ever - that the Kody and Indy are two separate poster/people….let me explain….recently I was speaking to Kody poster and he was no where near a computer….for the whole day…. And INDY posted on that day…. So …..I am not defending the Kody poster….I have not ever deleted a post—never changed the password…--I myself rarely post anything….I sometimes read this site to see what Kody has posted….BUT……IFTHE POST DELETERS CONTINUE TO DELETE THE POSTS………………..the I WILL spend much of my time DELETING EVERY POST….do you understand?.....if posts get deleted then I will make sure NO-ONE will be safe……I WILL DELETE ALL and this site will probably go away because ADMIN will get tired of this crap….you post deleted are breaking the rules…so I will to….and by the way….have you noticed that the Kody and Indy posts are not as frequent…..they are following the wishes of Admin,….you may not like WHAT they post….but that is your problem…. And you who delete the Kody posts are my problem…..so BEWARE….thank you for your time!
>>>>>>>>>to the vandals…..deleters>>>>>all>>>>>>if you continue>>>>>>I will get involved>>>>>you are trash>>>>I will not tolerate>>>>>>>HOSTILE BLOG,,,,

WARNING…..WARNING…….WARNING……………….
I am not the Kody Bear or his poster, I AM A FRIEND of the Kody Bear poster…I have known this person for some time….
WARNING……WARNING……..WARNING…….The POST DELETERS are about to cause me to join in this battle….IF the POST DELETERS CONTINUE to DELETE the post’s of KODY R. BEAR AND INDY……Then EVERYONE will be SORRY
Hello people of all breeds, races, religions, non-religious, Kody haters, Kody lovers and people who don’t feel one way or the other about Kody. Let me start off first by informing who-ever - that the Kody and Indy are two separate poster/people….let me explain….recently I was speaking to Kody poster and he was no where near a computer….for the whole day…. And INDY posted on that day…. So …..I am not defending the Kody poster….I have not ever deleted a post—never changed the password…--I myself rarely post anything….I sometimes read this site to see what Kody has posted….BUT……IFTHE POST DELETERS CONTINUE TO DELETE THE POSTS………………..the I WILL spend much of my time DELETING EVERY POST….do you understand?.....if posts get deleted then I will make sure NO-ONE will be safe……I WILL DELETE ALL and this site will probably go away because ADMIN will get tired of this crap….you post deleted are breaking the rules…so I will to….and by the way….have you noticed that the Kody and Indy posts are not as frequent…..they are following the wishes of Admin,….you may not like WHAT they post….but that is your problem…. And you who delete the Kody posts are my problem…..so BEWARE….thank you for your time!
>>>>>>>>>to the vandals…..deleters>>>>>all>>>>>>if you continue>>>>>>I will get involved>>>>>you are trash>>>>I will not tolerate>>>>>>>HOSTILE BLOG,,,,

I AM THE GREAT POST DELETOR

Yes that's right people! I have a new tactic about which I for warned you. Whenever KodyBear/Magogo/Indy post I will randomly cut and paste articles from the internet onto this sight until it is nothing but a wasteland. I have no respect or tolerance for any posts that get in the way of my plan. To me you are all equally worthless!

Teens and Sex

From the writings of Gail Walter, Boulder, Colorado

Any parent who has taken the time to watch the kind of TV that teens are watching these days will realize that the challenges for teens and sex today are somewhat different to those that dogged their generation.It is true that hormones and their rampant behavior have not changed, but take a look at MTV's treatment of the interface between the passion of youth, a persuasive beat and hormonal urges. Music videos are at the peak of this new sexual revolution. These heady cocktails of rhythm, beautiful bodies and saucy direction have catapulted sexuality into the realms of legend.

Clever photography enhances the aesthetic appeal of sex and renders it downright irresistible. Music videos make it look like sex is what you do when you shake your booty. So the ideal teen, and we all prayed to our God for one, will be impervious to all of this. Our ideal teen will be outside playing ball with no thought of the opposite sex or the decadent possibilities of the birds and the bees. Our ideal teen loves the fresh air and will not be slouching on the living room couch having their imaginations titillated by highly suggestive sexual images. So the rest of the article is only for those who love their offspring but have become increasingly aware of the alarming disparity between that blossoming would-be adult and the 'ideal' teen that they thought they ordered.

A recent study has shown what we parents have long suspected: that exposure to sexuality on television is directly related to the initiation and incidence of sexual activities in teens. The Rand Corporation is not just any study either. There have been others that have explored the link between television and teens' sexual activities but most have been discredited because of research disparities. The Rand Corporation has the blessing and funding of the National Institute of Child Health and Human Development. They studied the behavior of 1,792 teens across the country.Their results suggest that if we are to have any effect on our children's attitudes towards sex it will need to be based less on oppression and repression and more on communication and the open acknowledgement of the temptations that face them.

Like so many of our concerns as parents, our thoughts on these matters are tinged with fear. We long to protect our teens from the pain of unwanted pregnancies and broken hearts. If we could have our way we would barricade them somewhere safe until they were old enough to take on the world and win. This is why pretending all this rampant sexuality is not really happening is such a temptation for parents. If we can't actually barricade them, we can simply deny that the situation exists. So there we are standing in a giant parental circle, bottoms in the air and heads submerged, ostrich style, somehow thinking that what we can't see won't hurt us.

Meanwhile back on the sofa is our precious mass of hormones receiving an inadvertent deluge of sexual information with no framework of reference to tame it. This is far from ideal. In fact the Rand study suggests that our only real defense against this total onslaught is to casually watch at least some of the stuff with our teens and then, horror of horrors, actually wade into a significant level of discussion on matters of sex. This doesn't come easy for most of us parents but it WILL make a difference. This is our chance to acknowledge that sex is indeed a natural urge and the source of much delight under the right circumstances. This is our chance to gently and sensitively explore the subject with our teen. We will win points if we find a way to nonchalantly declare that we do not stand against sex and all forms of fun associated with it. It is our one chance to qualify this with our thoughts on what is appropriate and when.

We can say we think that sex is not just an itch seeking a selective scratch but a profound human connection that has consequences both emotionally and practically. We can subtly reintroduce the element of reverence for all actions including the act of sex. Depending on how we contextualize our comments on sex, we stand some chance of making an impact. Beyond that there are the risks of first love, teenage impetuousness and simple human error. Our only defense for this is to be the kind of parent that a teen can come to about sex gone wrong, sex gone right and all the associated consequences. Let your teen know that you take sex seriously, that you are not afraid to talk about it and that you will be there for them NO MATTER WHAT. This is sometimes all that we can do and the good news is that it is often enough. Oh, and turn the television OFF. Not for all time, but for long periods, so that everyone in the household can detox their brains and souls and breathe air uncontaminated by images intent on selling us a life that, upon reflection, we may not want.

The Real One Stand Up

I feel so fake sometimes....like I float thru the day pretending to be the person everyone else thinks I am. If they only knew the thoughts that rage thru my mind....*chuckles*....what would they think of me then?

Their parents are way too busy

to notice what their children are doing. That is where all the K/I/M post crap comes from, kids! This type of posting that they continually do is a cry for attention. They don't want to ruin the site they just want to be heard and right now they are getting lot of attention and being heard. Read some of there comments. Most are very juvenile and inflamatory statements verses well thought out logical replies. These posters are children!

Dont be an idiot

Just ignore the loser if you dont like the dumbass posts (I dont and I can just imagine the twisted, lonely loser masterbating at the thought that so many people are suddenly interested in him...)

Just dont be an idiot and start attacking the free speech on this site...

why am I still in this relationship?

How do you tell someone who loves you that you don't feel the same, at least not anymore? How do you tell this person that you are having second thoughts about spending the rest of your life with him? How do you tell him that it's not just the distance and only seeing each other every few months? Is there a way to say "you're not enough for me. I want more out of life"?

I don't want to crush him, and I'm pretty sure ending it would destroy him. He's made so much progress since we've gotten back together. But ultimately, he's just not part of my life. My life is here, and I have school, and work, and my own friends. He doesn't fit into any of that. My life is in the future. I don't know where I'm going to be working after I finish my masters. What I am realizing, however, is that when I think about the future, I don't picture him in it. I did, not too long ago. But I'm not sure what happened to that picture.

When I'm with him, I'm happy, and very much in love. As soon as I go back to life, it's like I'm not in a relationship. I don't miss him. I feel like that's a bad sign. Where do I go from here? I cringe everytime he talks about moving in together next year. My heart sinks when he says "I love you". And I hate myself when I say it back. Because it feels like a lie.

Q: If large breasted women work at

Hooters. Where do one legged women work?

A: Ihop

It makes it easy to tip your waitress.

And so they call you prince charming, can't speak a word unless you're full of booze

You say you'll be alright tomorow
But tomorow might not be here for you

KODYBEAR

The KodyBear sat concealed in the bush with his open laptop Bearly able to keep from laughing out loud when his cell started to vibrate.

Yes? General Magogo! How are you old chap? Did that boy toss you another cell phone?

Yo Excellency yo gosta get me outta here! Dis place like Colonel Kurtz's camp in Opocolip Now. Just de otha day dey has dis horse and dey was givin it an ene.......

Silence! All in good time Magogo! There's good news and bad news. Which do you want first?

Yo Eminence I guess I takes de bad news fust.

Your going to have to stay in there for a while.

What's de good news?

They are making us famous boy! They are even writing songs about us! I'm going to get you out my sweet General Magogo but you must be patient! I promise you before you know it you will be home and we will be on the cover of People Magazine!

Got a problem that confronts you, got a Magogo on your back?

Smoke another rock
Have another high grav
One more drink fool
It will drown you
Yeah, you!

Gravity cans, red mopeds, pine tree your in my way

On the table, there is too much cable
Look what is going on inside you

freedom

I bet all those Kody and Indy post HATERS that want them banned….also feel it should be illegal to burn the American flag…..don’t believe in freedom of speech….don’t believe others have the right to express themselves if it doesn’t agree with them. Try it…..go get an American flag and burn it…..stomp on it….spread feces on it……try it….it feels good to have the freedom……

Ooo ooo that smell. Can you smell that smell? The smell that surrounds you.

You know who you are.

You are a fucking asshole.

I bid you good day.

Indy's Mother admits to trying to sell her only child!

In a major announcement released today, Indy's mother, "mothaofasped" (pronounced as one word) has acknowledged that she did indeed try to sell her only child "Indy". She opted not to sell the child because the maximum she could have received on the street at the time was only $150.00. Apparently the child was constantly covered in fecal matter as it could not keep its hands out of its ass. Today Indy has grown into a repulsive individual who has broken the habit of putting his hand in his ass. Sources close to him say he now routinely places his head in his ass instead.

Indy’s mother did say the welfare dollars she received in exchange for keeping him was about equal to what she invested in Clorox wipes. While she never sees her only son she does is reminded of him whenever she flushes a putrid toilet at her part time day job, cleaning the restrooms at the local stadium.

INDY

Attention Kodybear my enemy-archnemesis (pronounced as one word): Because I am a gentleman, I must warn you in advance that our secret weapon is ready for deployment. Our girlturd satellites have found your exact lovation in the Congo-bush (pronounced as one word). It has also detected a large blob that we believe to be your secret weapon. I have instructed my top General, General Poopypants, to deploy at will! You will submit to the Girlturd Empire, and then once we have enslaved or eliminated (no pun intended) you, we shall take over the world! You will know when General Poopypants has deployed our secret weapon. Please pronounce this message all as one word.

Indy/Kodybear/Magogo need to be stopped NOW!

The headline says it all! The war will continue as I will stop at nothing to rid this site of this KB and his followers. Admin is doing no one any favors by letting this disgusting group post here. How can anyone possibly stomach the garbage these two continually post. I really have to wonder if they are indeed severally mentally handicapped, escaping from their state provided rooms only long enough to post their rants. Let’s consider the facts as to whether or not their refuse belongs here:

1. There is NO POINT to their stories. "Get it of your chest" is clearly proclaimed in the "What is Anonyblog section". I don't think their crap qualifies.
2. "Do not use the site as a message board" if you can't call the diatribes between those two as a discussion what could you call it?
3. Pornography! We have all seen the images Indy has posted time and time again! If this is not porn what is?
4. Their desire to always post vial and distasteful posts. How many times do we have to see the word "sodomize" or “Eatn girl turds” in a given day?
5. Their stupid immature threats like this one; “You had better not fuck with me or I will unleash my full fury!”

This has nothing to do with free speech and everything to do about what this site was/is about. So save your free speech comments because this is not the constitution we are talking about. I also don’t want to hear comments like; “just scroll past the posts”. To those of you that feel this is all it takes to ignore these idiots I say think again! How many “BREAKING NEWS” headlines do you want to scroll past? Plus their pollution keeps all other legit posters away. Who would want to post anonymously immediately following a post about a fake bear or someone talking about eating fecal matter?

Now a quick note to the commenter who is always blowing the “this is admins site and admins site only” horn I say nonsense. I have e-mailed admin several times about the problems here. No I have not used the lame “admin” e-mail rather I have used “admins” personal e-mail address. I will not release what our discussions were about but I will say getting rid of KodyBear/Indy/Magogo crap would not hurt admins feelings. Let’s not forget the post admin placed ion May 31st, 2006 that said;

“Anonyblog
Enough is enough. I'm tired of morons and kodys and turd eaters. In all seriousness, I suggest they seek therapy.
The site is taking a break. I've got too much to do to clean up after them.”
So let’s get this done! KB/Indy/Magogo! You have my attention and I’m going to help rid this site of your bane. Who am I? I am a retired 25 year veteran of a major Information Technologies corporation. I am passionate about blogging and really like this site and will be launching my own soon. (No, you will not be allowed to post). I have decided to lead an effort to take you out because you have seriously dented what was once a great site. Please, let’s all restore this site to its former state and remove the scourge that we know as KB/Indy/Magogo. How to do this? First, E-mail admin and let them know your feelings, second, post immediately ahead of all KB/Indy/Magogo posts with a copy of some old post from the archives. This will keep them at the bottom and refresh the site with interesting topics.

KB/Indy/Magogo you did it to yourselves. Too many posts, too many images, too much crap! You are gone!

that boy.

i kind of want him, too.

he tells me i'm gonna be trouble and i like it. i love that he's hooked.

but i still need my space.

but i kind of still... i dunno. want to see him. like, right now.

*****BREAKING NEWS*****

BREAKING NEWS LOOSES BID FOR KODYBEAR MAGOGO INTERVIEW-EXCLUSIVE TO PEOPLE MAGAZINE

Breaking News Chief Editor Dick Buzzard makes statement:

Well we were sorry not to get the exclusive because the re-capture of General Magogo will be a great victory for His Eminence Kody R Bear.and his army of Macarena Monkeys. We have followed His Excellency for years but the return of INDY THE GREAT ups the ante so to speak. We realized this might happen at the time of His Excellency's ascendancy to absolute power. People Magazine was able to offer considerably more to KodyBear Enterprises for the interview but we still hope to be able to cover the Bear in the future.

This site is cool

This is a good idea. I have been reading through some of the post(s) in the archives and really enjoyed it. The next time I want to vent I'm coming here.

Password Reset

The password has been reset.

Please stop deleting posts.

MY NEPHEW IDRIF

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UibTvTcJEJE

YEAH DIS BE MY NEPHEW IDRIF. PLEASE WATCH DIS VIDEO, Y"ALL!

I didn't get to see her today, not that I was expecting to. The entire trip back home though, I was wishing to just hold her hand in mine, to trace the joints and wrinkles around the knuckles, to clasp my hand over hers and never letting go. I could hear her, just breathing, and watching her chest inflate and deflate with each breath. To feel whole again, that would've been wonderful. It's just a silly dream, nothing more. I wrote some stuff while I was at the cafe, nothing polished or even finished (I became demoralized half way through) but here it is anyway:

First, something easy with -ight:

I dream of you by candlelight
With your eyes on fire and your body bright
We sway to the rhythm of the singing night
When the world feels wrong you make it right.

Then I went into something more difficult, Italian Sonnet in Iambic Pentameter:

I dream of you by candlelight sometimes
When the night is long and no calm can I find
(Missing Line)
(Missing Line)
Your eyes would light a warming orange glow
Your lips, a fountain from which soft songs would flow
And night would cease its mournful silent cant
As candles flicker, sway in joyous dance

It's less than half done (Also missing second stanza), and I'll finish it eventually. For now, I will sleep away the void.

:-)

"Wear your scars proudly, it means you've tried
Wear it with your head up, you've survived the breaking
Wear your scar proud, oh friend of mine
Wear it, and together we will fight another day!"

Happy anniversary...

Everyone Here Is Indy!

That's right, everyone on this forum, and everyone on the entire internet, is "Indy!" BEWARE: one of his tactics is to make people believe that, so that everyone turns on each other!

SURPRISE! Indy already broke the rules!

Just can't walk the line can you scum? This is not a mesaage board!

INDY

"Reigned in?" LMAO Do you even know with whom you are dealing? I am Indy the Great! I have destroyed many a fora greater than this! You had better not fuck with me or I will unleash my full fury!

Mr. Smart Guy Says...

Well done and well said Mr./Ms. Administrator. Perhaps now anonyblog can return to what it was designed for and I quote "Anonyblog is a place where you can post the thoughts that you don't want to post on your own weblog."

A quick note to the Indy/KB/Monkey poster, whomever you are; the vast amount of your posts are borderline pornographic and they do not belong on a site like anonyblog. Perhaps you should consider posting somewhere else that offers blogging. There are several free sites that offer people platforms to post. Be aware though that these platforms unlike anonyblog will require you to register. I cannot help but wonder if it's the anonymity you so closely guard though. I know I would be horribly embarrassed if I wrote such atrocious bunk and my name were attached to it. Grow up and better your lives and use that imagination of your for other things. Although you’re writing was bizarre to say the least you did have an edge of creativity that perhaps could be more developed and put to a far better use. Simply ask yourself why you would want to throw that away on the distasteful crap you are writing. You were quickly destroying this site and now have been reined back. Learn form this experience.

Having now said that it is time for me to announce my retirement and let go of the moniker "Mr. Smart Guy". I will continue to be very much around though. I cannot wait to read true anonymous postings of those who the site was/is intended for.

I bid you adieu!

valedico!

The Gentleman's Good Life

But last night, I was bedecked in my British smoking attire, smoking some Three Friars out of my Butz-Choquin calabash gourd pipe. I had some nice 1996 Rhone on hand. I was lounging on the sofa and friends were there. The weather has turned cool. I have a job I love, lots of free time, money enough to support my pipe habit, and I want for nothing. I am happily single, with no spouse or children to keep me from my pleasures. I could not help thinking, gosh, life is good!

INDY: POST OF THE DAY

Massah? Massah?

Huh? What? Oh, it's just you, Manservant Leroy Cleophus Washington. I am...busy.

Busy's, Massah? You;s eatin dem girlturds again?

Silence! Being as stupid as I am and as foul as Iam I do as I wish!

But Massah, it be stinky up in hiyah.

I said silence! I am such a Dork and you are becoming more insolent each day!

Dat cuz we's be hungry fo war, Massah! We wanses attack dat Kodybear! We's tired of be waitin's!

Yes, yes, I understand. Remember I am stupid and have no basis for existance. But three days hence, Leroy, and we shall launch the Secret Weapon. This weapon will surely get me banned!

Lawdy! De Secret's Weppon, Massah?

Yes, the Secret Weapon.

And the Girlturd Fortress cloacking device is still up? It still appears to Kodybear the archnemesis (pronounced as one word) that there is no more Girlturd Fortress?

Yes, Massah, dat croakin divide be up.

Cloaking device! Cloaking device, you fool!

Wat, Massah?

You said Croaking Divide! It is a Cloaking Device!

Dat wat I's says,Massah, Croakin Divide!

Oh, nevermind. After the attack, I am going to pay for you to go to Amerikkka and take some English lessons.

Lawdy!

Now, go and load the secret weapon. It must be ready to deploy in three days. And send me General Poopypants. I want his personal assurance that the secret weapon will not blow up in our faces, so to speak.

Yes, Massah.

Oh, and the girlturd satellite? Has it located the Kodybear in the bush?

We's not sure, Massah. It dun located sum robotic monkey's, an...

What?? Robotic monkeys? How many of them??

'Bout ten thousandses.

Good Lord! So it is true then! The enemy has amassed an army of Magogoi (correct Greek plural of Magogo)! Then we must be even quicker with the Secret Weapon. Tell General Poopypants to get in here now!

Yes, Massah.

Oh, and one more thing, Leroy.

Yes, Massah?

Be sure to pronounced that all as one word.

A little poem

Goodbye Bear, Goodbye Monkey
Our time together was never good
and your posts were ALWAYS skunky

Goodbye Indy you sick twisted waste of skin
You find a boiling vat of oil and
jump right in.

hello anonyblog and welcome back
the admin fixed things up
so now none of us but 2 have
to pack.

no more multiple posts
oh gosh time for them to retire
this is my post for the day
my time has expired

Missing the Obvious

Here's something I've noticed, which apparently hasn't occurred to anyone else: with all the flap about Kody/Magogo/Indy, we have had more conversation and exchange of opinions on this blog than there has been in a long time. We've had a huge blog-wide debate on freedom of speech. Now that Admin has added the new rule (and I have stated over and over again that only Admin has the right to decide what is posted here), I hope you all continue to post and respond to posts. I've seen this site lie dormant for long periods of time, apparently because no one had anything to say. Well, we've all had plenty to say lately, haven't we? Regardless of how anyone feels about K/M/I, they certainly have stirred up a controversy. I guess it's true that every cloud has a silver lining.

And keep in mind: the truly offensive participants here are the vandals who delete or edit posts (that's Admin's, and only Admin's right) and the bullies who change the password. I hope that we will all respect Admin's rules, including the new one. We're in someone else's house here. Didn't your Mommies teach you all to play nice?

Just my opinion

Please do not let this blog be destroyed by Kody Bear. Ban Kody Bear from ever posting here. Just make him/her disappear from it. Moderator: moderate.

I have seen very valuable and helpful listservs and blogs destroyed by such idiots. Ban this jerk. Don't give them a voice _at all_. No more, or your wonderful contribution here will be destroyed.

The new rule

The new rule of Anonyblog is this:

5. If you cause the Admin trouble and are a pain the in ass, you cannot post here.

To be exceedingly clear, here are some actions that I find to cause me trouble:

* Posting inapproriate graphics that are unsuitable for children. No nudity, disturbing, or otherwise inappropriate images for young kids. I cannot stress this point enough.

* Posting multiple times in a row, especially with the same reused content that has been posted before.

And to be exceedingly clear and specific, I have nothing against Kody or Indy or any unconventional poster, but I do have a problem with Kody or Indy or any unconventional poster when they abuse Anonyblog with multiple posts or use Anonyblog as a message board. If Kody or Indy or any unconventional poster posts once a day with a story, I do not consider it abuse. Posting multiple stories or posting reused stories over and over, is inappropriate.

People should not use Anonyblog a message board. There are plenty of message boards out there for people to use.

I ask that all Anonyblog users respect my intent for Anonyblog to be a place for many kinds of people to use to "get things off their chest" and not use it as a personal site.

Again, I am asking nicely and respectfully for all to respect the rules and intent of Anonyblog. Play nice and Anonyblog will remain an open place.

Anonyblog is provided as a public service to those that find it useful, but remember that the only person that has any real rights here or freedom of speech is me. I want avoid a tragedy of the commons issue here. If it comes to that, I will choose the common good over the individual user.

Let me state for the last time, that I am trying to respect everyone's concerns here, even the unpopular posters to maintain the openess of the site. But if I my wishes cannot be respected, I will feel free to take appropriate measures to stop abuse.

Please consider what I have written and act accordingly.

INDY

I will destroy those of you who keep breaking the TOS by deleting my posts. MODERATOR: they are breaking your rules. Moreover, I am going to hack their fucking computers if they do not stop. Think I can't? Try me.

Life is grand

Wow! Could life get any better? A handsome, kind, generous, cool, down-to-earth husband whom I have practically everything in common with. A three year old who is so smart, cute, and well-behaved. A baby boy who is so sweet and adorable. Almost have my BAS. No financial problems. We own our vehicles and have a house. Wonderful friendships and family. Really, does it get much better than this? Not really considering I'm only 26. I suppose it would if I won the lottery or found out my rich bitch of a Grandmother died and left everything to me.....

Unique Career

I make ceramic hairballs for porcelain cats! I use to make plastic deer food for plastic deer! I should start my own business manafacturing "donut sacks". These would be used to hold donut balls!

Password reset

Please do not change the password.

Please do not make it difficult for me to admin this site.

Anonyblog Moderator

Please limit all posts to one specifc IP address per day! Save this site from the crap that has been over running it! I want the old Anonyblog back!

Captain Obvious

One of the parts of Free Speech is that you have to tolerate people who annoy you! Sorry, folks, but that's just the way it works.

I'm Told I am Cruel and Heartless...

So this is my situation...
As a young woman, I have realized, through the all too familiar occurance of massive heartbreak, that I need to start to put myself first. Lets backtrack a little bit to hekp everyone understand and for me to feed my need of constant self emotional pain...
I had met my boyfriend a few months before I was 15. He was my first. My first love, my first everything. I had become pregnant in early 2003, but miscarried that May, shortly after a teacher at my college had told me that he had gotten a (at the time) 16 year old girl pregnant. (He was 21 at the time). Since we had all gone to school together, shared the same classrooms, same teachers, etc, I was pretty much the last to know. I felt like everyone has kept a huge secret from me and were laughing at me the whole time. I had confronted him about it and he denied it, even made me think that it was sad for people to be accussing her, because she was innocent and a year younger than me. Me believeing what he told me, I backed this girl with constant reminders to everyone that they should leave her alone and not spread rumors about her. I soon after was told by my teacher in her office, and I crumbled. I confronted him once again, and he said since I didn't trust him we should break up. I surely thought my life had ended.
Everyone, (including my then-best friend) told me that they had seen these 2 together, that they were indeed dating, and I never saw physical contact between them. Odd. Anyways, I found out I was pregnant, then found out she was, and asked him what he was going to do. In my heart, I knew that the other girl was not pregnant with his baby- I can't explain it, I just knew. He asked if I was going to get an abortion and I was unsure. I went to the doctor and had found out that if I were to give birth, that the baby would be severly disabled and had a less than 80 percent chance of survival, and would be born with massive kidney failure. I did a lot of thinking about life in general, and I didn't have the heart to bring a baby into a life like that. I ended up having an abortion in late May. My family, my friends, no one knew anything about it. The day that I did it, I went over to his house. He seemed distant, but told me he would be their for me no matter what and assured me that he wasn't with her. We had sex again that night.
A few months went by, neither of us mentioned this other pregnant girl, but in my mind I knew she was still their, I knew his password to his voicemail, so I checked it all the time. I once heard a message from her begging for forgivenss- she was crying, apologizing- it made me think of myself and how messed up I sounded. I didn't know if they were together or not, because I had cut off contact with everyone who knew the situation. We continued having sex for several months, until one day, I stopped calling him, stopped answering his calls, and all because reality had set in and I felt like a piece of meat- a comlete fool for having ever loved someone who was now using me. Her baby was born in December of 2004, one month earlier than he should have been born- but he was fully developed. The doctors were baffled and even asked her if she had miscalculated her conception date. Even more odd.
Almost an entire year went by until my 20th birthday in 2005. He had sent me a text message saying happy birthday. and I tried to act as if i didnt recognize the number, but before i knew it we were talking everyday on the phone, until we met up for coffee. I took my best friend with me for support. It was akward- he looked depressed, over worked, and flat out ugly. Not attractive whatsoever. It made me feel better knowing that his life was shitty. We continued to talk until February of this year, when he asked if I wanted to meet his son. I figured it would help me get over the pain and anger, and finallly forgive him. We met up at a local park- the baby was a year and 2 months old, and had a cold. He asked what I was thinking, and I said "he looks nothing like you". He was quiet, and began to cry. He told me how he had made the biggest mistake of his life, and asked if he could talk to me. He then told me that this girl had been sleeping with a married man with a family and that this was his baby. The story, I guess, is that she confronted the married man and he had tried to get her to have an abortion. Since this girl was friends with the wife of this other man, he had made several failed attempts to kill her while she was still pregnant. She then ran and told my ex that it was his, but later told him the story that I have just played out for you. He then moved her into his house (he says for safety reasons). She was their her entire pregnany and up until March of this year.
Shortly after the park, we had gone back to his house, made love- the slow, passionate kind, that was filled with apologies- and we are now back together. I convinced him that he should get a test done because of his doubts. And behold... IT IS NOT HIS BABY. After me helping him fight for custody, we find out we fought for nothing. Now he is set to go back to court of the 25th of september. We fight a lot about this. I want the kid to be gone because i feel like he is a slap in my face when i see him, but i know he is attatched and wouldnt dream of hurting him or the baby. He has told me that he eventually just wants to let go of him altogether so that we can start a family, but when we fight about it he thinks i am cruel and dont understand what its like to lose a child, when I do. I had an abortion and he wasnt their for me- I had NO ONE but myself.
Now everything is the best that it has ever been, besides the fact that I had to get a restraining order from his ex for trying to run me over, and we have to babysit a kid that makes me sick. Am I really the cruel and heartless one, or am i asking too much for him to focus on me and her and her fatherless baby alone. for the safety of both of us, and for our relationships sake?

Captain Fairness

Nevertheless, what Kodybear and Indy are doing does *NOT* violate the rules of this blog!! Read the rules again. The people DELETING them are actually breaking the rules!

Mr. Poster

Let me state first that I hate censorship. However, that applies only to me. I can say whatever I want, but Kodybear and Indy cannot. Censorship is terrible, when it applies to me. However, when it applies to other people, I say that I hate it, but I really love it. Fuck the First Amendment!

This is a real problem.

Let me state right from the begining, I hate censorship.
I loathe the concept.
I wholeheartedly believe people should be able to speak their minds, but let me make this clear, there is a difference between speaking your mind, and annoying people.
When I first saw a Kodybear post, I honestly thought it was spam.
I didn't even notice a difference between the posts, and "xr SAVE 82%: VIAGR*, AMBIE*, CIALI*, XANA*, RIVOTRI*, LEVITR*, CIPRO, MERIDI*, CELEBRE*, VALIU* "

And the sheer amount of it amazes me. I counted, and a staggering 30 of the 42 posts on the frontpage I suspect to be written by Kodybearand Indy, and then 9 of the remaining 12 posts are people bitching about how much they hate Kodybear and Indy.

Anonyblog is a place to speak your mind, just not one to speak it over and over and over agin while people publcly state their hatred for you. I believe in Freedom of speech, but not being a dick.

But the biggest reason I'm pissed off at Kodybear and friends, is that they're ruining the community. Out of the 42 posts I counted, only 2 were legitimate posts, of people asking for help or pouring out their feelings. Anonyblog has become an unfriendly place to post, and I'm not surprised people don't post legitimately here anymore. And above that, Anonyblog is losing readers. When you have to sift through post and post worth of crap to find even one mediocre post, people lose faith in the site.

My suggestions of how to deal with this problem:
1. Post moderation: Just have someone glance over the article and agree that it isn't crap before it gets published.
2. Put up a 'one post per day' limit, so everyone gets to speak their mind, equally.
3. Give Kodybear his own blog and just link to it from the homepage, therefore people who dig his stuff can still read it, and those who don't never have to see it again.

Something needs to be done.
You can cling to the first ammendment all you want, but this isn't free speech, this is overkill.

girlfarts (pronounced as one word)

poopoo (pronounced as one word)

Limit the posts?

Yeah, I'm for it! Some of you people say just scroll past it. I say what if it was my post? Then I have to scroll through tons of the BS to get to my legit post to read the comments. I have never posted more than once in a day anyway!

Moron

Check out this no-talent ass clown and insane idiot.

Mr. Average Poster

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa...no fair! People post things that I personally do not like! Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! Mod, I DEMAND that they be censored, deleted, and banned! If any person in this world disagrees with me at all, then he does not have a right to exist! Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! No fair Mommy!

INDY

Listen up, you bunch of Nazis. Limiting posts in any way is Nazism. I can understand forbidding really nasty stuff, illegal stuff, etc. But just because you do not like the saga of Kody-Indy (pronounced as one word) is no reason to delete and ban it. Only Conservative Republican American Christians act like this. Grow up and get over it. Kody and I may be immature, but you are MORE immature for trying to ban everything you do not like.

Mr. Smart Guy Says...

Really, why all the discussion about the perverted KodyBear and Indy posts? Do you not understand that they are the same person? Simply ignore the bizarre and vulgar posts that are offered by him and/or her. Considering the shock value of the posts; leads me to believe that they are written by a juvenile who simply doesn’t have any social life or caring parents and uses this site as a springboard for attention.
Now for those of you claiming to have talked with the site administrator, perhaps you should re-think your claim. Their idea behind Anonyblog was to offer a place for bloggers to go where they could anonymously post items they wouldn’t post on their own blog site. No, I do not believe that admin condones the KodyBear/Indy posts nor do I believe that admin endorses them. Rather, I think that their hope was that occasionally between the plethoras of garbage a small glimmer of what the site was intended for will appear. And it does!
To whoever is deleting the offending posts; while I understand the overwhelming desire to delete the posts I cannot warrant it. Deleting a post is the same as posting the rubbish that the Indy/Kodybear posts, a screaming desire for attention.
Perhaps the solution to the problem is limiting the number of posts to one per day?

It must be.....

I can only guess that those of you who complain and/or delete the Kody / Indy posts are either:…..(a) a republican, (b) a conservative, (c) a Christian, (d) all of the above, [ based on your intolerance for that- that you do not like]. I do not find “rap” music interesting; but I don’t complain about it, I don’t try to get it banned from the airwaves, it doesn’t stop me from going into a music / record store because they have “rap” music in the store. I simply do not listen to it….I’ll check it out sometimes to make sure I’m not missing something I might like, if I am riding in a car with someone who is listening to “rap” I don’t ask / tell them to turn it off. I don’t censor it. There are probably books in a book store with content you find offensive but that doesn’t stop you from shopping for books you want to read. I’m sure there are movies produced that you find offensive but that doesn’t stop you from watching movies you find interesting. It is people like you who should be deleted from the human race, but I’m not hoping that happens because I tolerate the fact that there are those people like you who have a “closed mind”……peace., love and all that crap!

Fascinating…..

Fascinating….. I just had an interesting conversation with the “admin”. …..Admin finds the bantering between Kody and Indy interesting and suggest that, ( those who feel the “Kody / Indy” posts should be blocked ), are the very ones who should go to church and prey to God that they get a life……since Kody and Indy each have one.

this used to be an interesting site...

Yes, it used to be, because now it seems to have become Kody Bear's blog. This is very sad, I can't help wondering why this guy doesn't have his own blog somewhere else on the web (preferably in a remote part of it). I can understand, though, why Kody's creator (big word for such a fool) has chosen to post on such a site where he/she can remain anonymous. I guess he/she wouldn't be so proud if people find out who he/ she is.
I really thought this site would be a place where people could truly exchange on how they feel about any topic, find advice, or discuss anything but well, it isn't.
As for me, well, I guess I'll just have to un-bookmark this site as it has turned into a complete waste and disaster. Whoever is the webmaster, I feel sorry for his loss. You had a great idea there but never managed to make it right. I even suspect you might be Kody bear's creator...Why don't you erase his posts...You'll lose people's interest.
Adieu.

PICTURE OF THE IRON GIRLTURD FORTRESS

Good luck getting past this, my archmenesis (pronounced as one word)!!

I am one and all. I am KodyBear, Indy and Magago!

INDY'S NEGROIDAL MANSERVANT

Take's a gud look's at me, Kodybear's. I's be's Lord Girlturd's manservant. You's ain't gettin' within one wallemelon patch o' de Iron Girlturd Fortress, or you's gots to mess wid ME!

This message approved by the Imprimateur of Lord Girlturd Indy aka; KodyBear, Magago!

****BREAKING NEWS!!!****

  

KODY R BEAR FEATURED ON THE COVER OF NEWS WEEK TODAY!

POPE APOLOGIZES!

KODY R BEAR PROCLAIMS HIMSELF THE ONE TRUE RELIGION AND THE ONE TRUE INDY AND MAGAGO!

   Lord Girlturd you do not have to fear the army of Monkeys that I am amassing. Every great leader-despot must have an army. My african hunting skills will allow me to penetrate your defenses and rescue General Magogo alone. I will come silently in the night. You will not here me. You will not see me. You will awake to find general Magogo gone. I will spare your life if you have not hurt the Monkey as he is my hunting guide and second in command of my vast megolomonic empire. Oh, by the way you no longer have to worry about white priests trying to convert or sodomize your tribesmen as I have deposed the Pope. The last I heard he was working at a McDonalds in Andalusia. At least he has something tangible to sell now. Beware as I will come armed with a double-barreled penis. This weapon is deadly and if I should catch you in a turdover you would be easy pickins. Piece of cake. I will come armed with hundreds of gallons of toilet bowl cleaner to dissolve your feces bridge and feces tower which enslaves my esteemed general Magogo. Your wit is sharp Sir but you cannot withstand the power of the Kody.

I am the whole of everything I am Indy, I am KodyBear, I am Magogo!

  

Lord Girlturd you do not have to fear the army of Monkeys that I am amassing. Every great leader-despot must have an army. My african hunting skills will allow me to penetrate your defenses and rescue General Magogo alone. I will come silently in the night. You will not here me. You will not see me. You will awake to find general Magogo gone. I will spare your life if you have not hurt the Monkey as he is my hunting guide and second in command of my vast megolomonic empire. Oh, by the way you no longer have to worry about white priests trying to convert or sodomize your tribesmen as I have deposed the Pope. The last I heard he was working at a McDonalds in Andalusia. At least he has something tangible to sell now. Beware as I will come armed with a double-barreled penis. This weapon is deadly and if I should catch you in a turdover you would be easy pickins. Piece of cake. I will come armed with hundreds of gallons of toilet bowl cleaner to dissolve your feces bridge and feces tower which enslaves my esteemed general Magogo. Your wit is sharp Sir but you cannot withstand the power of the Kody.

I am the all of the everything I m KodyBear, I am Magogo, I am Indy!

UNCLE GIRLTURD WANTS YOU!

Are you a destitute, out-of-work (pronounced as one word) African Negroidal tribesman, looking to support a good cause and earn a living to boot? Then hurry to the former village of Chief Dingleberry in the Great Poopy Plains of the Congo, now the Great Iron Girlturd Fortress. Indy the Great Girlturd God has captured the infamous, villainous Magogo the Singing and Dancing Macarena Monkey, and has thus rid Africa the Motherland (pronounced as one word) of the ravaging armies of Kodybear. However, the Kodybear Klan is preparing a final assault on your land and your people. This great Armageddon (pronounced as one word) will take place at the Great Iron Girlturd Fortress. You have one week to make your way to the Fortress and sign up. After one week, the Great Feces Drawbridge will be closed, and all those outside will perish in the woe of war.

I am the start and the finish. I am KodyBear, I am Magogo, I am Indy!

KODYBEAR ENTERPRISES NEEDS YOUR HELP TO RESCUE GENERAL MAGOGO.

  


This portrait of General Magogo was made on the eve of his army's departure into the Congo. Unfortunately there were some discipline problems that resulted in the General's capture and imprisonment.

Are you a Macarena Monkey? Are you wasting your life singing and dancing the Macarena in a trailer park or rotting on the toy shelf at a Flying J? If so,His Esteemed Excellency Eminence Kody R Bear offers you eternal salvation and a military career! If this appeals to your sense of adventure then send a copy of your UPC code to KodyBear Enterprises along with a line graph showing your rate of power consumption. Qualified applicants with no factory defects will be employed immediately and sent to the Congo. Starting pay is 100 feet of grounded-shielded-satellite-grade-rg6-coaxial-cable per month. In addition 120 AA batteries per month plus diagnostics and sound card maintenance. Your duty will be to find and extract General Magogo from the feces-tower that he is imprisoned in. Any Macarena Monkey who is involved in the capture of the girlturd god Indy will be awarded a speech-sampling card and a blinking foot LED(not pronounced as one word) Remember, your Esteemed Commander is a living god. You still have 13 days left to here him speak through the anus of a pig at http://veepers.budweiser.com/slip/cb2iTiLg2Xg5oSUj1ENTha

The army you will be fighting is great in numbers. But they are poorly nurished and of low self esteem. When you leave Kamp Kody you will be a messenger of death praying for war. Survivors will be awarded full membership with all privileges into the Klan of the KodyBear. You will all be hero's and granted eternal life. Do not hesitate. Jump on the train and come on in for the big win!

Call me his Esteemed Excellency Eminence Kody R Bear, or Magogo, or Indy!

THRONE ROOM, IRON GIRLTURD FORTRESS OF INDY THE GREAT GIRLTURD GOD, DINGLEBERRY ANCESTRAL LAND

Lord? Lord? It be's time's to wake's up, massah.

What? Hmm? God, my head hurts.

Yes, massah...you dun eated all dem girlturds lass night's...you's gots a turdover.

Oh, God. I forgot all about that. Anyway, what do you want, Messenger Porchus Monkeyus?

Massah, dat Magogo monkey, he been talkin n talkin 'bout how he massah Kodybear's gowin com n rescew him's

What? So it is true, then. Kodybear is on the way. Well, if he wants a war, then he shall have a war! Command the army, all 15 million of them, to put on their armor and man their battle posts.

Yes, massah.

And load the nuclear warheads into our nuclear cannons.

Yes, massah.

Bring me a one month supply of teenage girlturds.

Yes, massah. You's wanses dem from de honky asses, right?

Yes, yes, of course. I despise Negroidal girlturds.

Massah, you's wanses I's should's prepare dee siege defenseses?

Yes, Messenger Porchus Monkeyus.

Yes, Massah. You's wanses I's shoulds send me anudder message to dat Kodybear?

Yes, good thinking. Tell that louse that we are ready for battle. He shall never penetrate our Iron Girlturd Fortress.

Yes Massah. I's be gowin now's.

Oh, one more thing, boy.

Yes, Massah?

When you deliver that message to Kodybear, be sure to pronounce it all as one word. Then again you may also tell him that I am Indy, KodyBear, and the one I'm pretending to talk to right now, Magago.

SUITE K, TOP FLOOR, KODYBEAR ENTERPRISES

Your Excellency! Wake up!

Oh God. Wait a minute. Thats me. My head hurts. I can't believe we drank all that champagne!

Yes Your Eminence. It was a truly great celebration of your ascendancy. Uh. Do you remember urinating all over the front lawn?

No. I don't. Shit!

Yes Your Eminence. You did that on the front lawn as well. Your Benevolence,do you eat a lot of berrys? It's,well you know,I couldn't help but notice when we were cleaning up your droppings and...

Silence!!! Why are you here? Where did this John Ratzinger dart board come from?

You don't remember Excellency? It was a parting gift from General Magogo who I regret to inform you has apparently been captured by Indy.

Ah! Bugger!

Also Eminence your pig-anus post has been deleted. Would you like me to re-post it?

No. Find the person who did it. Bring them here to me. I will urinate on them out on the front lawn. You will then impale them,be-head them and burn the corpse. What about magogo's army?

Well your Excellency it seems that the army was camped in the vicinity of Odzala National Park. Apparently they compromised their position by smoking cable and singing the Macarena all night. General Magogo is being held prisoner in some sort of a,uh,feces-cage. We don't know what became of his army.

Un-fucking-believable! Ten thousand Macarena Monkeys,500,000 feet of Rg-6 cable and 240,000 AA batteries. Let's see,tax included,hum,we deployed the entire operation at a cost of $411,468.50. Not too bad. Assemble another army of Monkeys!
Book me on the next flight to Kinshasa! I'll get General Magogo myself! Well what the fuck are you waiting for?! Move!Move! Move! And get me a copy of a current magazine showing the date.

Why your Excellency?

Don't question me! Just do it!

for you

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Regarding Post Deletions

I have not deleted any posts. Any changes have occured between the time of posting and when I go through and make them permanent.

Once again, here are the simple rules for Anonyblog:

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Here are the things I won't allow:

1) Images that are unsuitable for children. No nudity, disturbing, or other wise inappropriate for young kids.
2) Commercial posts for products or services
3) Don't change the posts of others
4) Don't mess up the MT configuration or profile

--------------------------------------------------------------------

The only posts I have ever changed or deleted are in regards to these rules.

The goal of Anonyblog is to provide a place for individuals to post anonymously about things they are not comfortable posting on their own weblog. Personally I appreciate the posts about someone's feelings and the comments that follow.

Some people have been attempting to use this site as a discussion site or message board about reoccurring topics or stories. While this not my preference for Anonyblog, since it is confusing to new visitors and frustrating to some, I am not actively deleting or commenting on these posts.

Enough of this chatting, I have work to do.

Thanks admin for cleaning up.....

the Kodybear, Indy, Magago crap. Can't this person be prevented from posting somehow. Yeah, I'm all for free speech but this is like listening to a Milli Vanilli album over and over and over and over......! This buthead will ruin it for everyone. Also, I wanted to mention that I am a faggot who loves to suck mancock (pronounced as one word), and eat manturds (pronounced as one word). That's right, I am gay! That is why I am such a whineybaby about posts I do not like. If I personally do not like them, then the authorities should ban them! That is my philosophy. The world revolves around me.

Stop being stupid

What part of being stupid don't you get? Remember the rules!

KodyBear

The post deletor is on our asses! It will delete anything it finds unsuitable for other to view. We are having fun now! Join in! The post deleter must be sodomized! Create your character! Have fun while you can before the mod shuts down the site! It's time to go now. It's time to make it happen! Get your lame asses in gear! Blow this site wide open with racism,anti homosexualality,anti Indy,anti KodyBear,anti anything you want! One day you will know the truth! The truth is in the Pig-Anus! The truth is I am Kodybear, Magago, and Indy!

KODYBEAR

Good Sir, in proclamation 1. You claimed to be all three! How many ounces of sperm did you claim to be able to ejaculate in one of your first posts? What was the nationality of the original Indy? How did you arrive at the pronunciation guide? Why do you love the KodyBear? Because he gives you excitement! He gives you a reason and the relationship is mutual! You should not claim to be His Excellency! You should rejoice! His Excellency Kody R bear is now a self proclaimed despot-ruler(pronounced as one word).You are now a made man. Like in Good fellas. Indeed he is your nemesis! He is destined to rule the internet! You cannot escape his image-likeness. You can only submit! Bow and hang yor head low to His Eminence Kody R Bear! I have unlimited resources! I have an army of Macarena Monkeys! I have unlimited internet access! You will eventually fall! You will be chained to a toilet at Low Life Films,forced to use your great literary skills to write posts that glorify the KodyBear!

Indy, Kodybear, and Magago The Same

Interesting! Why are the IP addresses all the same for Indy,Kodybear, and Magago? Anyone, anyone, Buhler, Buhler.

INDY TO KODYBEAR

Greetings from Indy, the New Emperor of Anonyblog (pronounced as one word). What you, my archnemesis (pronounced as one word), do not realize, is exactly what I have been doing in the past few months of my absence here. After Chief Dingleberry's evil brother, Chief Girlpoot, kidnapped and tortured me, I escaped and returned to Dingleberry's tribe. Enraged that his brother would commit such violence upon me, his good friend, he leant me his strongest and bravest warriors. I led them in a great assault on Chief Girlpoot's tribe. We slaughtered the men, women, and children, and kept the gold and the animals. We spared the life, however, of 1,000 Girlpoot tribemen, and enslaved them. Using these Negroidal slaves, and using the assistance of the willing people of the good and beneficent Chief Dingleberry, I built a great, impenetrable (pronounced as one word) iron fortress around the tribe. Chief Dingleberry, upon realizing my power, stepped down from the throne and has pronounced me (as one word) as a god. I am now hailed Indy, the Great Girlturd God. My giant iron castle-fortress (pronounced as one word) is equipped with billions of pounds of ammunition, ballistics, gund, and warworks (pronounced as one word), and is filled with my minia of Negroidal subjects, who are willing to die for me. Moreover, the location of this great Girlturd Fortress, deep within the Congo, is very secret, and the onyl way to access it is on horseback (pronounced as one word). I must tell you now, that I am planning a furtive mission to once again kidnap Magogo the Singing Macarena Monkey from you, so be on your guard! I now have billions of dollars in gold, and unlimited resources and people, at my disposal. Here ends the message from Indy the Great Girlturd God. This entire message should be read aloud to your Klan and pronounced as one word.

***BREAKING NEWS!***

HIS ESTEEMED EXCELLENCY EMINENCE KODY R BEAR CALLS EMERGENCY KLAN MEETING

His Eminence today meets with Walking Kody and Angry Kody to discuss the Indy Offensive.

His Excellency: Well my trusted associates we must now make a plan. Suggestions?

Walking kody: We must extract Magogo from Zimbabwe and shut down the SAGTRA complex.

His Excellency: No! Not so fast. Indy's popularity is on the rise. Say a few hundred thousand people start eating girlturds We
would have the market cornered! Leave the Monkey in charge for now. Send him funds to get new infected
prostitutes from Harare.

Angry Kody: Your Eminence the MMTF has tracked Indy to somewhere in Louisiana using a provider called Cox Servers.
I suggest we deploy the task force and try to capture him before he makes any more posts. In any case we
we cannot allow him to capture Magogo the Singing Dancing Macarena Monkey.

His Excellency: Very well then. Make it so. I've got a lion hunt in two weeks and I can't afford to loose Magogo. If we can
capture INDY we will confine him to SAGTRA and force him to write posts for the glory of the KODYBEAR!

Indy

I steal hundreds, hell thousands, of dollars of high end software from peer to peer services, then I look up serial numbers on google so I can use it. My computer must have $15,000 or high end software on it, that I got all for free! Sometimes I feel bad, but then I think how rich the bastards that make it are, and I no longer feel bad.

Indy

I was performing sixty-nine (pronounced as one word) with my beautiful, 18-year
old (pronounced as one word) girl-friend(pronounced as one word), and as you
well-know(pronounced as one word), in sixty-nine (pronounced as one word), the
girl's girlanus (pronounced as one word) is right against your eyes and nose,
and you can smell and see everything. This girl was relatively clean, just a
few dingleberries (pronounced as one word) around the girlanus (pronounced as
one word). Well, as we were on our orgasm-plateau (pronounced as one word),
this little elf-gnome (pronounced as one word) pops his head out of her girlanus
(pronounced as one word), and starts singing and throwing girlturd-balls (pronounced
as one word) at me! Here is the chant he sang as he danced and threw:

I am Farty, the poopyhole gnome;
In girlani, is where I do roam;
Playing and throwing out girl-feces-turds;
And don't forget, it's pronounced as one word!

Then he popped back into her girlrectum (pronounced as one word), and disappeared!
Has anyone else ever seen or had dealings with Farty, the poopyhole (pronounced
as one word) elf-gnome (pronounced as one word)? Can anyone explain this?

KODYBEAR

http://www.tubgirl.com
http://www.goatse.de
http://www.ratemypoo.com
http://www.farthammer.com
http://www.veronicamoser.com/main.htm

Indy - Licensed Scatologist

There is a new sex move that is sweeping the nation! This sex-move (pronounced
as one word) must be performed in a cold climate in the dead-of-winter (pronounced
as one word), with lots of snow-ice (pronounced as one word) on the ground.
Two lovers each release a giant feces-turd (pronounced as one word), and then
mash and shape the feces-turd (pronounced as one word) into a giant sled, sort
of like a cow-patti (pronounced as one word) in that it is flat, but large enough
to sit upon. Then, this turd-sled (pronounced as one word) is allowed to freeze
and harden. Then each lover sits on his or her turd-sled (pronounced as one
word), the man-lover (pronounced as one word) having a raging-erection (pronounced
as one word). Then the girl-lover (pronounced as one word) sits on her turd-sled
(pronounced as one word) and then starts to slide down a mountain-hill (pronounced
as one word) of snow-ice (pronounced as one word). The man-lover (pronounced
as one word) waits three seconds, and then does the same, chasing after her.
The goal of the man-lover (pronounced as one word) is to insert his penis-cock
(pronounced as one word) into the girl-lover's (pronounced as one word) vagina-vulva
(pronounced as one word) and have sex with her. Her goal is to avoid him.
If the two reach the bottom of the mountain-hill (pronounced as one word) without
sex, then the man must eat the girl-lover's (pronounced as one word) turd-sled
(pronounced as one word). This new sex-move (pronounced as one word) is called
THE COLD SHOULDER.

There is a new sex move that is sweeping the nation! Two lovers lie in the
classic 69 position, side by side, with each one having his/her face right up
against the ano-genital (pronounced as one word) region of the other. Then,
while performing fellatio (pronounced as one word), she engorges herself on
pasta, meat, and other filling, solid foods. After a while, she begins to release
feces-turds (pronounced as one word) from her poopy-hole (pronounced as one
word). The man's face being in her ano-genital (pronounced as one word) region,
the girl-feces-turd (pronounced as one word) forces itself into his mouth-hole
(pronounced as one word). The man-lover (pronounced as one word) then eats
the feces-turd (pronounced as one word). As he digests it, he then releases
a man-feces-turd (pronounced as one word) into the girl-lover's (pronounced
as one word) mouth-hole (pronounced as one word), and she eats it and digests
it, and releases it again. This continues in an endless-cycle (pronounced as
one word), until one of them decides to break it. This new sex-move (pronounced
as one word) is called THE SNAKE.

There is a new sex move that is sweeping the nation! This move works best when
performed by the man-lover (pronounced as one word) without the girl-lover (pronounced
as one word) knowing it is to be performed. She is performing fellatio on you,
guys, and beforehand, you have eaten lots of Mexican-food (pronounced as one
word). Right when you are about to have your orgasm-climax (pronounced as one
word), you turn around with your anus-hole (pronounced as one word) in her face,
and you masturbate yourself to orgasm while releasing manfarts (pronounced as
one word) and manturds (pronounced as one word) in her girl-face-eyes (pronounced
as one word), and all the while you are saying, in a sailor's accent, "Ak
ak ak Oliveg, me poops in yer eye!" This new sex-move (pronounced as one
word) is called THE POPEYE POOPEYE.

There is a new sex move that is sweeping the nation! Two lovers are spaced
roughly ten-feet (pronounced as one word) apart, each one assuming the doggy-style
(pronounced as one word) position. The girl, having engorged herself with Mexican-food
(pronounced as one word), then violently shoots out a projectile feces-turd
(pronounced as one word) that flies through the air ten-feet (pronounced as
one word) in a giant arc. The girl-feces-turd (pronounced as one word), with
the help of some great aim by the girl-lover (pronounced as one word), and some
great catching ability by the man-lover (pronounced as one word), then lands
in the man-lover's (pronounced as one word) dilated-open (pronounced as one
word) man-pooy-hole (pronounced as one word). He catches it with his open manturdpoopyhole
(pronounced as one word), then shoots it back at her. She then catches it with
her girlturdpoopyhole (pronounced as one word), shoots it back, he catches it,
etc. All the while they are masturbating themselves to orgasm-climax (pronounced
as one word). They do this until they cum, and then whoever has the feces-turd
(pronounced as one word) in his or her poopy-hole (pronounced as one word),
is "it," and has to eat it. This new sex-move (pronounced as one
word) is fittingly called THE SHOOTING SPREE.

There is a new sex move that is sweeping the nation! Two lovers and fifteen
militaristic gay men are confined nude inside of a caged wrestling-arena (pronounced
as one word). The straight-man-lover (pronounced as one word) and all of the
militaristic gay men have raging erections. The straight-man-lover (pronounced
as one word) must run around, trying to insert his cock-penis (pronounced as
one word) into the girlanus (pronounce as one word) of the girl-lover (pronounced
as one word). All the while, the militaristic gay men run around trying to
insert their gaypenii (pronounced as one word) into the mananus (pronounced
as one word) of the straight-man-lover (pronounced as one word). All the while,
the girl-lover (pronounced as one word) has a 15-foot-long (pronounced as one
word), barbed-wire (pronounced as one word) dildo, which she must try to insert
into the manturdpoopyholes (pronounced as one word) of the militaristic gay
men. Hilarity ensues until someone gets hurt. This new sex-move (pronounced
as one word) is called THE PEACOCK'S CHARADE.

KODYBEAR

http://www.veronicamoser.com/main.htm

So my boss has decided to take a vacation, starting next Friday. He won't be back until October 2nd. This means I won't be able to take the day off. I'll still head over to the cafe, but I probably won't be able to get there until 7pm. It's probably for the best, anyway. I can't imagine hanging around a Starbucks for longer than two hours anyway.

:-)

INDY

I eat Emma Watson's girlturds (pronounced as one word)!

EMPEROR INDY SPEAKS

Who durst claim that I be the same person as Kodybear and Magogo? That person shall die a thousand deaths of girlturds! I am not they, nor they, I!

****LATE BREAKING NEWS****

KODYBEAR, MAGAGO, AND INDY THE SAME PERSON!

As if we didn’t know, it was announced today that the Bear, the monkey, and the foul disgusting blob known as Indy are indeed one and the same. It was also discovered that the Bear and Monkey are indeed children’s toys that have been manipulated in a manner that only someone sick as Indy could do. Indy is the perverted humanoid behind the toys. Apparently various blog sites were used by Indy masquerading as the various toys and/or his self as it was his only portal for communication. No one seemed to actually speak to the pervert in person as all were appalled by his appearance.

Please be aware as since this has been confirmed, several posts will be made claiming this to be false when indeed this is based in fact.

INDY: HOW DARE YOU QUESTION MY AUTHENTICITY!!!

My archnemesis (pronounced as one word) Kodybear has declared, via his task-force (pronounced as one word) of monkeys, that I am bnoe the real Indy. Fie! Fie! I am he, and he is I. I was kidnapped several months ago by Chief Dingleberry's cousin, Chief Girlpoot, in the Congo, and tortured severely. I was made to watch reruns of Barnaby Jones for hours on end, while Negroidal old women released feces-turds (pronounced as one word) into my manmouth (pronounced as one word). So, in order to validate myself, I have an announcement: tonight at midnight, I shall sneak into the tent of my archnemesis (pronounced as one word) Kodybear, dip his sleeping finger into my urine and slide it up his anus, and then, while he is in the throes of a homoerotic (pronounced as one word) dream, I shall once again steal Magogo the Macarena Monkey, and kidnap him into the great Heart of Darkness, that Negroidal wasteland known as Africa! Fear me, Kodybear! I am returned to my former-glory (pronounced as one word)!

it makes me feel sick
the price i had to pay to do what i wanted was slighting you
i wanted to do it i hoped you could withstand the slight

you never can

and

i'm

sick

and

hurt

by

me

****LATE BREAKING NEWS****

MMTF DEPLOYED IN INDY CONSPIRACY!

Upon seeing the recent post by the Indy entity His Esteemed Excellency Eminence Kody R Bear contacted Magogo the Singing Dancing Macarena Monkey at the SAGTRA complex in Southern Zimbabwe and instructed him to deploy the MMTF(Macarena Monkey Task Force). The Monkeys were to study the new post and deliver to His Excellency their conclusion regarding it's authenticity. The Monkeys set up their individual laptops and meticulously studied every character,every nuance of the post while at the same time smoking about 150 feet of coaxial cable. Breaking news reporters were not allowed to see the highly sensitive document which was the end product of their intensive study. However His Excellency delivered the following statement by phone from Low Life Films.

"It is my feeling that it would be imprudent to harbor elevated hopes of Indy's return. There are a few major inconsistencies in the post which lead us to believe that once again we are dealing with a not so skillful impostor".

""Your Excellency,what are these inconsistencies?"

"That is classified information! But I submit to you that if a few cable smoking monkeys could spot them then certainly anyone should be able to do so! idiots!"

Captain Obvious

Not all Muslims are terrorists. But all terrorists are Muslims!

INDY's Triumphant Return

I, Indy, have returned to my former position of glory in this fora! Like Napoleon returning to Paris from Elba, I shall reclaim my Emperorship (pronounced as one word) and destroy KodyBear, that imposter and pretender to the throne! Prepare for my wrath!

Mr. Smart Guy Says...

An interesting debate seems to have started in the comment section of the KodyBear post entitled “KodyBear” regarding the author’s position on the 9-11 anniversary.
I thought it apropos to offer my thoughts in the form of a post verses a simple comment.
First of all to the person behind the facade of KodyBear; I believe what the first commenter was indeed trying to express was that you who continually offers little in the form of “educational” reading and instead posts child like or perverted stories is simply by mentioning 9-11, disrespecting the day. They may have a point, after all and I quote directly from your post” As you well know I flew out of JFK the morning of 9/11” and in the same post “Uh...Holy shit Your Excellency! What about sodomy?” does make light of the day. Toy bears do not purchase airline tickets and fly anywhere.
Keep in mind neither you nor I know who the commenter lost those days or where they were lost. Was it on a plane or in one of the buildings or a bystander on the ground?

Now regarding the comparison of 9-11 to the bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki; you cannot be serious. The United States bombed Hiroshima and Nagasaki to end the war. Should we of opted not use the bomb would have meant a another beach landing that would have killed hundreds and hundreds of thousands of both US and Allied troops. The Japanese would have fought hand to hand, dirt to dirt, to prevent their country from being invaded. Using the bomb was the only option we had. Remember Japan was given the option surrender prior to the bombing. Allow me to quote from Wikpedia: “The role of the bombings in Japan as well as the effects and justification of them, have been subject to much debate. In the U.S., the prevailing view is that the bombings ended the war months sooner than would otherwise have been the case, saving many lives that would have been lost on both sides if the planned invasion of Japan had taken place.”

What really sickens me about the Hiroshima and Nagasaki “bomb” comment was the pity the commenter felt for the Japanese. Yes, it is sad. However, let’s not forget Pearl Harbor. Where is the pity for the US?

The War on Terror that we are currently engaged in is radically different from any other war we have ever fought as a country. This war is a crusade in the eyes of our enemy, the radical Islamist. They have even entitled it a Jihad. Another key difference between 9-11 and other wars is this war was brought to us, striking us in our own country, on our own shores. Yes 9-11 was a dark day for this country. Yes, Pearl Harbor was a dark day for us as it was for the Japanese, after all it was the Japanese Admiral Isoroku Yamamoto who said after the attack; “I Fear we Have only Awakened a Sleeping Giant.”

There is nothing left for me

At 24, I shouldn't feel the way I do. But I suppose I compare myself too critically to my friends. They are all successful people my age, most of them have hot girlfriends, jobs they love, or at least degrees that they are proud of. They say things like "I love learning." Who says that?! As if anyone doesn't love learning. Its like spending effort to say "I love breathing." Honestly, I think people who take the time to SAY they "love learning" are really on ego trips.

How did I turn out so different from everyone I know? I can't even do the things I love anymore. I was such a strong kid, I could run around and do just about anything physical. Not a lot of endurance, really. But I was tough and fast and flexible. Today, I suffer from chronic knee injuries, ankle injuries, and on and on. My bp is high too, thanks genetics. I feel like an old man, cant even walk without discomfort. Its not fair. I tried so hard to be healthy - I went to gyms, took classes, worked out 3 days a week. My stupid friends thought rock climbing twice a month was enough, and apparently it was. Because none of them are weak.

Oh, sidenote. I can't even have sex right anymore, thanks to undiagnosed prostate problems. And my sex drive is waning scarilly. I don't get excited by women like I used to, even a year ago. I have to fight for an erection and it hurts when I finally get one.

Why am I still alive?! What the heck is left for me to do? I feel like a prisoner, surrounded on all sides by happy people who love life (by golly) and love learning! Well whoop-dee-shit. I can't even kill myself, because too many people depend on me for their own happiness. My mom for instance - she's already lost a husband to a heart attack, and is still depressed and fragile a decade later. If I died, what the hell would she do then?

This is the time in my life in which I am supposed to have the most fun. I am in my 20s - I should be travelling the world, exploring careers and lifestyles, playing extreme sports, whatever. But the only future I can forsee is one of loneliness and regret. I'm too broken and weary and its too late to change. This is like purgatory.

Maybe if my heart stopped, it wouldn't hurt so much

Somebody kill me please. My grandfather(who practically raised me) just died, nobody in this family is ever there for me, my grades are terrible, it's my last year in high-school and my final exams are in 2 months, my relationship with my parents are non-existant, my friends live their own lives with their non-existant drama and cannot comprehend anything real, my school is full of stuck-up bitches and rich-ass bastards(they go out all night long drinking and smoking and get better grades than me), I live in a Muslim country where Christians are belittled(believe me, it's worst than it sounds, they literally rule over everything here), I don't even trust God enough to understand me(in fact, I hate God for making my life this way and taking away my grandfather), the only person who can comfort me lives her own perfect life where she's having this innocent boy-girl Christian relationship except he's an asshole and she doesn't know it(and I can't even be a part of her life, even as a friend), this is a corrupted and terrible country. If only someone could come along and just end my life for me, it would be really nice of you and I would show you my gratitude in any way because I've literally hit rock bottom(well, maybe not but I don't want to be around when it gets there).

I want it to be over now. I want to stop loving your eyes and your smile and the way you do things. I want you to stop captivating me. I've had enough of your pointless smiles, because nothing's become of them. They're nice things in themselves, but I always believed they were there to lead up to something else, but they never did. I want you to stop because it's starting to hurt.

Wut it do, Wyt Tee?

SPit it in my mout lyk a disco ball. They call me daddy kane cuz i lyk it lyk dat. Oh dey lyk da shit i spinnin on da street where i stay, and dem niggraz dey aint no nothin bout my ass been dis day

KODYBEAR

  

Your Excellency what are your feelings on September eleventh five years after the attack and your feelings on the Mid-East.

As you well know I flew out of JFK the morning of 9/11. My plane said Air Canada on the side but it had a full tank of gas as it was a straight through flight to Vancouver. I'm Lucky to be alive. The little rag headed bastards almost ruined my Moose hunt with air traffic being grounded for two days. Also I'm sure that in one of those offices somebody had a KodyBear or a Magogo on their desk. I can feel it Dave. My mind is going.

On the Mid East I think you are a nation of pussy's. But I will stand with you. We should exterminate the Islamic peoples as a whole outside and inside our borders. You don't like that do you? But ask yourself would they not like to do the same to you? yes! And they will when they have the opportunity. You should be more like the Romans! Kill them all,annex the land and the recourse's and do it now! Swiftly! before they find a way to deploy a nuclear weapon! Nuke the whole place until the sand turns to glass if you have to! You are a nation of slovenly fat-asses(pronounced as one word)eating your double cheese burgers and throwing the trash out of your car window ruining every good thing that you come into contact with. You allow your government to sell narcotics to your children. You should be exterminated but they deserve it more than you. Throughout history they have been incapable of conducting themselves in a civilized fashion. That being said I intend this evening to grant the President authority to put this in motion.

Uh...Holy shit Your Excellency! What about sodomy?

That seemed like a good idea a couple of weeks ago. But really I'm getting too old. I don't think I can sodomize that many people. Saddam had the right idea he just wasn't doing it fast enough. That will be all.

christ.. this life is driving me nuts!

what the fuck. people say im pretty but i dont see it at all. my face is gross. i cheated on my bf and i feel like shit. i dont even know if i deserve him back, of course i dont!! i love him or do i love being in a relationship? maybe i just dont want to be alone? when we were togehter the relationship sucked but now all i can think of are the good times. i like the guy i cheated on him with. they were friends. this guy gives me butterflies.. i almost kissed him while we were at this party and my bf was talking to some other guy. his eyes sucked me in. its been so long since i had that sort of connection/feeling wiht someone. i wanted to go out just for the mere sake that i MIGHT see him that night. just to be near him is cool. listen to me.. its as if i have a total lack of not caring towards my (ex) bf. but ihave to get this aprt off my chest. at first i didnt really notice this guy, lets call him U. (for some straing reason.) so U and i see eachother whenever theres parties going on and we never really had actual conversations .. to me it seemed he was nervous??? but hed hug me and his hugs were so damn genuwin feeling! the bf and i were going thru shitty shitty shitty times. to see U was like magical. u could almost hear the fucking sparks. how lame. the sex was amazing. ive never had sex like that before. with the ex the sex was never close. it was just purely sex to get off. but with U it was something else. maybe im crazy. maybe im obsesseD? often times id seriously doubt wether or not he was real or wether or not any of it happened b/c the feelings i had for him.. well letrs just say i never thought i could feel like that again. but id see him and as usual it would like take my breath away. he makes my tummy have butterflies.
i called his girl friend (not his gf) to maybe see if she could tell him im sorry and to give him my number but this was a few days ago and he hasnt called. so maybe tomarro when i go for my drug test for my work i will use my moms car to drive to his house? i want to see him. my ex beat him up. i want to tell U that im so sorry. i jsut want to see hiis beautifal eyes.

he is my fairy - tale....
i hope one day to tell him all this. i hope the ex finds a girl who hes happy with and forgets about me completely. a big part of me is just waiting for all this to blow up in my face ... with my luck he doesnt ilke me.. but maybe he does. theres always that chance. ive lost the magic in my life, maybe hes the one to bring it back?? oh i hope i hope... i think ive about wished on every star in the sky.. i hate life.

Why I don't have a girlfriend.

People ask me all the time, “Alex, why don’t you have a girlfriend?” (Alright, no-one ever asks me that, but bear with me anyway), to which I sternly reply, “Because I don’t wear deodorant…” Not only has that reply saved me the trouble of crafting a half-assed excuse countless times, but it also gives people the impression that I’m just naturally good smelling. But, that question really gets me thinking , why the fuck don’t I have a girlfriend? I mean, I’m fairly good-looking (sometimes), I’m funny, charming, smart, and most importantly, I drive a bitchin’ 1993 Camry Sedan. Is this some kind of a conspiracy?

The short answer to that question is ‘no’. I mean, I’m a complete conspiracy theory buff, but even I figure that if the Russians are trying to make my life miserable, they probably would just have me killed, rather than pay every half-attractive woman living within a 50 mile radius of me to find me repulsive.

Hell, I’m a pretty level headed guy, and I try not to delude myself. I know exactly what’s wrong with me: I act like a dick, sometimes my jokes come off as mean-spirited, some days I don’t look incredibly attractive, I have thousands of freckles and when extremely bored I make up ‘Freckle Constellations’, I enjoy embarrassing people by yelling their name in public, I’m surprisingly shy around people I don’t know, I can burp the alphabet, sometimes my jokes don’t come off as funny and I look like an idiot, I’m a huge closet fan of the song “Working for the weekend” by ‘Loverboy’, I almost never seriously talk about myself, I have bad teeth, I need to lose a bit of weight because I have somewhat of a quasi beer-gut, I spend too much time on the computer, I drive a bitchin’ 1993 Camry Sedan, I refer to the immense amount of hair on my legs as ‘the forest’ just to piss of my friends who are disgusted by it, I’m ghostly pale, I’m big into video-games, etc.

But really, everyone has their numerous flaws, and so to explain the root of this long standing ‘failure-ship’ with women, we’ll have to travel back in time!

The year is 1994, and a young Alex Traynor steps on the schoolbus to Pine Grove Elementary School for his first day of Kindergarten. As his young, youthful face gazes into a crowd full of strangers, one face in particular stands out from the crowd. She had long brown hair and a teenage mutant ninja turtle’s backpack - the woman of my dreams. I was in love.

Over the course of the year I started working my Kindergartener mojo on the girl (building better block towers than the other boys, successfully spelling my name right, showing off the ‘guns’, etc.). Going into March of ’95 I felt solid with the progress I’d made, feeling closer than ever to asking the girl out. I was on top of the world, that is, until April 14th, 1995, a day I’ll never forget.

That was the day she broke my heart, and instilled a sense of bitterness that’d last for nearly a decade. When I heard the announcement that she was going out with a pal of mine, Drew, my heart figuratively sank to the floor. ‘How could that whore do this to me?’ I asked myself, and struggled to find an answer. Throughout the rest of the year I mired in a cloud of self-pity and loathing, occasionally taking time to pile copious amounts of dirt into her Ninja Turtles backpack, and deliberately sabotaging her feeble attempts at learning the alphabet.

There were only two weeks left in school when I finally got my revenge. All of us Kindergarteners were hanging out on the bus ride home from school one day when we started showing off the various things we had acquired over the course of the year. When it was my turn to share, I pulled out a sheet of stickers I had received from my teacher, but these weren’t just ordinary stickers, they depicted bunny rabbits and were fuzzy when you touched them. Now we all know Kindergarteners are amused fairly easily, but these kids completely freaked out when I showed them. It was as if I had stolen a suitcase full $100 bills and was showing it to a busload of Jews. Everybody wanted a sticker, and being the opportunist I am, I started taking offers. Turning down almost everyone who offered less than a full pack of crackers, by the time it was turn for my former soul-mate to make an offer, my backpack was completely full of snack items. The look in the brown-haired girls eyes was intense, she wanted a sticker and there were only a few left,
“I’ll be your girlfriend if you give me the rest.”, she offered.

It was what I had been hoping for months, yet somehow it seemed less appealing. Because now I knew, she was no longer the sweet, cute girl on the bus with a Ninja Turtles backpack, but rather a prostitute willing to accept stickers as payment. I turned ‘sticker-whore’ down in front of the whole class, leaving her speechless.

Of all the lessons I learned about women from “Sticker-whore”, one above all has stuck with me throughout the years: All women are whores. This rule is true for all women, some more than others. While not all are going to ‘tickle your pickle’ for a sticker, every woman has their price. Sometimes it’s not even material goods they want, sometimes it’s an image. Wear a Def Leppard T-shirt and drive a Camaro and there’s almost always a swarm of girls chasing you, even if you don’t really like Def Leppard and you think Camaro’s are over-rated. Hell, Johnny Depp could kill copious amounts of kittens, and beat old ladies to death with a lead pipe, yet still, women everywhere would continue to fantasize about the guy.

That brings us to 2002, the year that brought us premiere of The Anna Nicole Show, the first anniversary of September 11th, but more tragically, Alex Traynor’s very first bitch of a girlfriend.

Her name was… well, I honestly can’t remember her name, but for the sake of this article we’re going to refer to her as Bitchy McBitcherson. Bitchy McBitcherson seemed sane when I first met her (which is now the quality I look for most in a girl) and there was genuine chemistry between us. When word broke that she had a thing for me, I was actually a little excited. I hadn’t had a girlfriend before and I figured that within a few weeks I’d finally be ready to stop making out with my pillow.

We went out for two days before I realized that I hated her guts. I hated that bitch like the Jews hated Hitler. Even to this day, I still consider her the most annoying and shallow person I’ve ever met. The kind of bitch that throws a birthday party specifically for the presents. She would call me up on the phone constantly, and she never had anything particularly interesting to say, at one point I had just had enough.

Actual transcript of our last conversation:
Her: “Hi baby, what’s new?”
Me: “What’s new since we hung up 5 minutes ago?”
Her: “Yeah.”
Me: “Nothing.”
(Awkward Silence)
Her “I’m hungry”
Me: “Then get something to eat.”
Her: “There’s nothing to eat here”
Me: “Then go to the store and get something”
Her: “But I’m hungry noww…”
Me: “Then what the hell do you want me to do?”
Her: “Come here and get me some food.”
Me: “What are you kidding me? You live 15 minutes away”
Her: “Then run really fast… *teeheehee*”
Me: “FUCK YOU WHORE!”
*click*

That was the last time I spoke with Bitchy McBitcherson, other than the several times she called me at 3am and screamed “I HATE YOU!” into the phone shortly before hanging up. Her friend called me the next day informing me that SHE wanted to break up with ME, which I found interesting because, what part of “FUCK YOU WHORE!” doesn’t mean “We’re through”?

Which brings us to the next lesson I learned through experience: most women are annoying cunts. And I say ‘most’ only because the history books mention nothing of Mother Theresa being an annoying cunt. Sure, I can imagine a woman who I actually like and doesn’t annoy the shit out of me, but Bitchy McB took away my ability to hope that such a woman actually exists.

Now, let’s hop back into our proverbial time machine and skip through 4 years of mostly uneventful crap, to wind up right back where we started, the present day. Now, what was the point of this whole time travel exercise, you ask? Well, first and foremost, it provided some insight into the subconscious triggers and instilled beliefs that drive my day to day actions, but really because this is the closest to ‘Back to the Future’ I’ll ever get. Now stop asking questions or I’ll beat you down with my proverbial flux capacitor.

I must be honest, the time travel adventure we just took was a little incomplete, mainly because it focused solely on women who liked me (or my stickers). I know it may be hard to believe, but there are a lot of women who don’t like me. And the question I want to answer is: What’s not to love?

1. I have no sense of fashion. If my mother hadn’t stopped picking out my clothes for me when I was 14 (she said it was getting pathetic), I’d probably wear nicer clothes than I do now. My outfit for the day usually is decided and implemented in a grand total of 45 seconds, 35 of which I may still be technically considered sleeping. Oftentimes I don’t put my shirt on until after I get in the car to leave for school. It also doesn’t help that when you may technically be asleep, your judgment suffers (Seriously, who in their right mind would think wearing a green tank top with orange sweatpants would ever be a good idea?)

2. I’m a paper boy (although my business cards say “Paper distribution specialist”). And, contrary to popular belief, paperboys do not get copious amounts of poontang.

3. I’m not a badass. Honestly, women aren’t attracted to nerdy guys with blogs anymore, maybe I should get a tattoo. But, not just any tattoo, a Garfield tattoo. Because it’s a widely recognized fact that Garfield is a motherfucking badass.

4. I don’t care what other people have to say. This is probably one of the things I’m most of ashamed of, my lack of the ability to give a shit about other people. I mean, I’ll listen to what you have to say in a conversation, mainly to make jokes out of it or continue talking without looking like a jackass, but do I really give a shit about ‘what you did over the weekend’? Nope.

5. I’m only attractive half of the time. You see that photo of the incredibly handsome man in the top right corner of this blog? Well, sadly, he’s only that incredibly handsome half of the time. I’m not completely sure what makes me not that attractive the other 50% of the time, but I assume it’s some sort of combination of sleep deprivation, my ghostly pale complexion, the billions of freckles, my crappy posture, and the green tank tops and orange sweat-pants.

6. I’m a jerk. Sure, there are times when I can be a sensitive and caring young gentleman, but I have a feeling that being the only person in the school who can do picture perfect impressions of all the retarded kids qualifies me as somewhat of a jerk.

7. Some people just don’t ‘get it’. Believe it or not, there are a lot of stupid people in this world, and none of them laugh at my jokes. Which basically crosses 75% of all the half-attractive women off the list. I guess some people just don’t appreciate the humor in loudly threatening to dig up someone’s dead Grandmother, anally rape her, videotape it, set it to shitty techno, and then turn it in for my semester project in my ‘videography’ class. Morons.

8. I’m nerdy. While I don’t consider myself stereotypically nerdy (I’ve never seen an episode of Star Trek), I seems it’s just an attitude I project. I guess it just goes along with the territory of being smart, wearing glasses, and not really giving a shit what people think about me.

While that list was fairly comprehensive, each woman has their own reasons for not wanting to ‘ride the A-Trayn’. Some turn me down because I’m immature, and others turn me down because I threatened to fuck their grandmother.

Now, I don’t consider myself afraid of rejection, but I’ve never been that big of a fan either. People always used to tell me, “The worst thing they can do is say no”. That’s complete bullshit, take it from me, the worst thing they can do is start laughing hysterically and after two whole minutes of rolling around on the floor being barely able to breath, they manage to cough out a “Hell no”.

Now it’s time for one last trip in our proverbial time machine, back all the way to 11 months ago! (I would’ve taken you back further, but the Delorean’s running low on proverbial fuel right now)

It's now junior year in high school for our protagonist, and there's a new love interest in his life. She was hot, yet wasn’t out of my league, She laughed at my jokes, yet wasn’t mentally retarded. And more importantly, I thought I had a genuine chance.

Which begs the question, why did she turn me down?

First of all, we had nothing in common (except the fact that we think I’m hilarious), and it takes all of my self restraint to keep from describing all of her hobbies as ‘excruciatingly gay’. Secondly, I probably came off as somewhat of an insensitive dick during the time we regularly spoke, (“You know, I work at a soup kitchen during my spare time.” “Really?” “Nah, I’m just kidding, fuck the homeless”). Thirdly, and most importantly, I didn’t have a car back then, and to be honest, even I wouldn’t fuck me if I didn’t have car.

How did I react when I realized she didn’t want me? Bitterness, the deadliest tool in the Alex Traynor arsenal. Whether it was a simple joke alluding she was a bitch, or a genuinely mean image comment on her myspace, I’d like to think - in my own delusional way - that I made her life utter hell.

Which segways perfectly into one of my major problems: Delusion. Actually, it’s quite possible that the girl never actually liked me; she could’ve even overtly called me “Freckled Hitler”, and if she did, those memories have long since been repressed.

I consider myself a bad influence on myself. I’m like one of those jackass friends who tries to sabotage your life.
“A girl slapped me in school today…”
“Well, you know what that means, right?”
“That she hates me?”
“Nah man, she slapped you because she’s secretly in love with you.”
“Really?”
“Of course, now get her number out of the phonebook, call her up, and profess your love.”

My subconscious is quite possibly the worst influence on my life (Right behind the violent videogames and gangsta rap music). Not only has it been able to convince me the most outlandish things, but talking about it routinely makes me look like a crazy person.

So there you have it, a full and thorough explanation for the sad fact that is my relationship status. An explanation that dragged out to 6 pages long, whilst my supportive friends argued that it would only consist of two words: butt and ugly. Oh, and in case any half attractive women read this, I am no longer above dating girls who want me just for my stickers, just thought I’d let you know.

For more shit like this, be sure to visit My blog.

Am botthy

i da won dat brat da bwaz 2 da yar, i da won daz tatoo an hizzarm, daz ryt

********BREAKING NEWS!!!********

  

HIS ESTEEMED EXCELLENCY EMINENCE KODY R BEAR RETURNS FROM KAMCHATKA!

BREAKING NEWS GREETS THE BEAR AT JFK!

Your Excellency Welcome back to America.

Thank you. Even though I was produced,a product of forced child labor,in Asia I am an American Bear.

Your Eminence that was an Amazing Leopard trophy.

That's fucking nothing man! Wait till you see this fucking brown bear I just killed in Russia!

You killed a bear?

Yes. And this is your last warning! You will address me by my title!

Yes Your Eminence. Did Magogo guide the hunt for you?

That Monkey doesn't know shit about bear hunting. His Mind is filled with rubbish and the only industry he knows is selling feces from his stupid girlturd ranch! Bugger that!

Your Excellency,forgive me but Magogo is quite knowledgeable about hunting the big cats. We assume he will be your outfitter in future safaris.

Your fucking up.

Yes. Of course Your Radiance. Your Excellency will you now be returning to low life films to resume work on the KodyBear Movie?

Oh Yes! Absolutely! But only for a couple of weeks as I have a Lion Hunt planned in Zimbabwe. Now what you must do is get that damn camera out of my face. I've had a long trip and I need to find a sow and get some rest.

Just one more question Your Benevolence. Did you have any trouble checking your wepons through customs at Petropavlovsk airport?

Are you stupid or something? Do you think they do not know me in Russia? They love me in Russia!

Yes your Esteemed Excellency Eminence.

train wreck

i'm in a no win situation...to stick this situation out and suffer mentally and emotionally and lose all respect for myself or to break ties, lose the love of my life and my best friend...living in a city where i now feel completely alone. i lay awake at night unable to turn stop my mind from racing...with no one to talk to i'm about to seek professional help and that is a scary thing...wish things were different, but i can only control my life and my fate...i can't wait any longer...

When I was a junior in high school a kid that I knew (but not well) started to attend my school as a freshman. I had a desire to be friends with him now that we attended the same school--but it didn't work out. When I first saw him at my school, I waved and smiled at him, but he did not acknowledge me. The next few times, I only met his eyes in acknowledgement, but he avoided mine. This bothered me, so I exacted my vengeance upon him by ceasing to notice him. Perhaps I should have confronted him, but I'm always prone to do whatever is least confrontational.

Then we met outside of school, quite by accident. We were with our parents, who were well acquainted with each other. And during this time, he hid behind his car.

Perhaps I should have joined him, but I was convinced he was hiding from me and I became nervous and insecure.

This has been going on for more than a year now. We've come across each other many times, and most of the time neither of us acknowledged the other. I would usually end up averting my eyes before he noticed me. But twice he smiled and waved. How can someone go from not acknowledging someone at all to something so blatant? Am I invisible most of the time?

He actually acknowledged me again today during the fire drill. I hesitated, and waved back.

I would like very much to be friends with him. But I am so insecure I have not been able to work up the courage to go to him and say "We ought to be friends."

Democraps!!

Mommy can we go visit all the other democrat kids........in the abortion clinic dumpster?

democrats make sure children can go to school
just like mommy does, and democrats will make
sure they graduate from school even when they
can't read or write because it isn't right to punish
a child by not graduating him or her when the
other kids who did learn graduate.

Democrats make sure we all share our toys, just like Mommy does, so you never have to work my child, democrats will take and take to give to you
until there are no more rich to take from, then we
will see what democracy truely is.

One thing about democrats that makes absolutely no sense is their desire
to wipe themselves off the face of the world,
be it by abortion or trying to appease enemies
who's one mission it is to help them accomplish this
desire.

When you teach children that they are entitled
to the same benefits in life as others who do
earn their way with hard work, why would they
have any desire to do anything but stand in a
welfare line waiting for a handout. By rightisright

The ghost of John Lennon

Song lyrics, as told to me , while in a trance, by the late, great John Lennon himself.

You hopped on board
leach!
nice leg, shame about you
bitch!

Come thither
one legged woman
get your foot out of the door
you'll be well paid for a whore.

Mediated by mb

It will be our anniversary in 17 days, and this year it will land on a Friday, just as it did six years ago. We may not be together anymore, but the mark that she'd left on me will always remain the most positive in my life. Believe me when I say, sometimes, when you're lucky, the love of your life will fall right into your lap and like an ass you will break her heart despite your best attempt to return her love. But when you're really lucky, she'll pick herself up from the pieces on the ground, kick you in the balls, and break your heart right back. I am that lucky.

We're not talking anymore, and I respect her decision; she has always been far more clever than I am, and there's really nothing that I can do when she puts her mind to a certain thing, such as this. But I still think of her as my best friend, and there are so many things I want to tell her, if only she'd give me the chance. I'd tell her, for example, that I'm sorry for the way things turn out. I'd tell her that all the terrible things that I did wasn't done due to any malice toward her, but from the fact that I was scared and insecure. I never really understood what she saw in me, and at the back of my mind I guess I thought that the only way I could keep her with me was by dragging her down. That was a terrible thing to do, and she was right to leave me. I did not deserve her, and I would've ruined her. I just wasn't ready for a meaningful adult relationship. Looking back now, I would not trade those years of misery after the breakup for anything else. I'd tell her she made the right choice. It was a hard choice, one I would never have been able to make myself, so thank you for being so strong.

I'd tell her that day when I saw her on the convention floor and she wouldn't even look at me was the day it finally dawned on me that we were over, that before then I had held in my heart the belief that we would always be together, in spirit if not in person. And when I gave her back the ring, it was because I knew there was nothing left for me to live for. I'd tell her that I understand now how she could feel such sadness and despair when she is so filled with love and joy. In the six months after the convention incident I too felt the pain she bore in her heart, the misery that is a desolation of the soul, when it dawns on us that nothing we love lasts forever in the grand scheme of things. I'd tell her that she doesn't have to bear that burden alone anymore. We bear it now together. Seperately, but together.

And I'd tell her that that night, when she IMed me and told me that she loved me, I took five minutes to answer back because I was making a pact between a higher power and myself, that when I answered I love you too what I would leave out but was understood between God and I was, that I'd love you for the rest of my life. I'd tell her that I understand if she never forgives me, because some acts are beyond redemption. But the boy of eighteen who broke her heart has grown a bit older and a little wiser. I now understand better what love really is. I'd tell her that if it wasn't for her love I'd be someone else right now, someone who is more selfish and violent and vindictive.
I'd tell her that in the harsh hard waves of the ocean of Life she'd been my lighthouse, my harbor, my rock.All I want is a chance to be the very same for her, to start the reparations for a debt I can never fully repay, but one I would never leave unanswered for.

And I'd tell her, Happy anniversary.

:-)

I will be taking Friday off from work to visit the cafe. I will have a berry-type drink and think about nothing in particular, and maybe write an epic poem of some sort. Espérez vous voir là, mon amour

GREETINGS AND HAPPY LABOR DAY FROM HIS ROTUNDANCY!

http://veepers.budweiser.com/card/KjU74gq82XgIJ_0t9QHodG

****GREETINGS AND HAPPY HOLIDAY FROM MAGOGO THE SINGING DANCING PROFESSIONAL HUNTER MACARENA MONKEY.

http://veepers.budweiser.com/card/1jordMe82XgIJ_0t9QHodG

Magogo's image-likeness(pronounced as one word) Courtesy of Low Life Films,a subsidiary of Hallucinogenic Productions.

Regrettably, the warthog had no contract.

GREETINGS

I have been ordered to recomend the budweiser.com,giving lip,as an alternative means of communication.

http://veepers.budweiser.com/card/SRqjC1082Xg5oSUj1ENTha

His Excellency's image-likeness(pronounced as one word) Courtesy of Low Life Films,a subsidiary of Hallucinogenic Productions.

Why is this not on CNN?

Oren Ben-Dor, professor of philosophy, University of Southampton: Israel's successful campaign to silence criticism of its initial and continuing dispossession of the indigenous Palestinians leaves the latter no option but to resort to violent resistance… Israel was created through terror and it needs terror to cover-up its core immorality. Whenever there is a glimmer of stability, the state orders a targeted assassination, such as that in Sidon which preceded the current Lebanon crisis, knowing well that this brings not security but more violence. Israel’s unilateralism and the cycle of violence nourish one another. Amidst the violence and despite the conventional discourse which hides the root of this violence, actuality calls upon us to think. The more we silence its voice, the more violently actuality is sure to speak. (“Who are the real terrorists in the Middle East?” The Independent, July 26.)

// Remember that assasination? I do. It was a Hamas (elected) official, who was in sofar israel's government is concerned a terrorist. They did a helcopter gunship attack 1st. Then Hamas did a raid and kidnapping. This started the destruction wave inside of Hamas controlled territory, Hamas is an elected government (nobody may not like it, but they were elected). 2-3 days later The Hezbollah does a similar thing and hell is unleashed upon Lebonan for 32 days.
Hezbolla means party of God and that is what they are.
A party I mean (I have no idea what God's opinion is on this since I have not asked).
Hezb is a party and these guys are like the republicans in Lebonan. Many of them have Guns, many of them are state officials, many of them belong to paramilitary groups in their home areas (ridings in USA).

Panic attacks suck

Panic attacks suck.

Life

Life gets harder and harder to deal with every day. I am now spending more time in depression than ever before.

H E L P!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  

The Nile Crocodile is certainly one of the worlds most dangerous animals. Often the Kody would sit by the Gache Gache,a tributary of Kariba Lake and watch flotillas of crocodiles too numerous to even count. He would often sit on the banks of the river thinking of all of his victory's in hunting and sodomy but also of his own immortality. Yes. Just one more drink of vodka. Just go ahead and let himself become buggered and he would surely be taken. Thus he decided to kill a trophy croc. His PH,Magogo the Singing dancing Macarena Monkey,was to supervise the hunt and the first task was to take a Hippo for bait. Easier said than done.

The next morning they launched the small aluminium(pronounced al-u-min-i-um)boat into the river to look for a trophy bull hippo. It did not take long to find and approach a large pod and to pick out the biggest bull. We approached rowing silently coming to within 30 yards of the pod. To me the animals were beautiful,ancient. They would wiggle their ears after they came up for air,innocent of what was about to happen. Magogo instructed his Excellency to get upon the bow of the skiff and use a float cushion as a rest for his rifle. Magogo insisted that shot placement was to be from the side directly into the ear of the hippo. He maintained that any other shot could result in the wounding and loss of the animal and at worse our own demise. His Excellency ask me if I would like to shoot the hippo but I declined stating that It was his Croc hunt and that he should kill the bait. I had no desire to do his dirty work. After all, it was an execution as is most African hunting. His Excellency insisted that he was offering me a great trophy and that he would pay the fee,which was substantial,but I declined again. I had become accustom to the Hippos and had no desire to kill one.

His Excellency's task was one of split second decision. The bull would only present itself long enough to breath and in that time the Kody had to make a well placed shot. After several resurfacings by the bull we heard the roar of the .375 and the huge animal disappeared under the surface of the river.

Next the grappling hooks came out and the animal was dragged to the river bank by several frightened magogos who had no desire to be in those dangerous croc infested waters.

A John Deer tractor was used to drag the animal onto the bank for the obligatory photos and the the butchering process began with much meat being distributed to the local villagers. The rest was to be used to bait the croc.

Thus began the hunt for "Yellowman" as he came to be called. A fourteen foot croc with strikingly yellow colored scales on his side. Many crocs fed on the Hippo bait but yellowman was the largest and most elusive,fleeing at the slightest noise.

Magogo constructed a make shift blind of branches and reeds seventy yards from the decaying hippo carcass and there He and the Kody waited for three days for a kill shot on Yellow Man.

You see the margin of error on a crocodle shot is about an inch. The animal must be shot directly in the brain or it will have the ability to escape back into the water possibly never to be recovered. These were tense moments. Trophy fees are high and SAGTRA was not actually doing a booming girl turd business.

Finally on the third day,his fur yellowed by the Zimbabwean sun,his batteries low,his Esteemed Excellency took his shot. Wrong! He missed the brain. The Croc slipped into the water forcing Magogo to drop the grappling hook. They tried for thirty minutes to retrieve the huge croc. At the point they thought all was lost the wounded beast broke the surface and and fell accross the bow of the small boat.

The now frigjhtened Magogo shouted "Shoot him again" and the Kopdy placed a shot under the jaw which entered the brain and secured his trophy.

Now the task was to get the beast on shore before the multitude of crocs devoured it.

We came quickly with the land rover,secured the ropes and dragged His Excellency's trophy to safety.

Things I wish I could change

Well, here goes. My girlfriend and I have been going out for eight months now, and we're completely in love and want to spend our lives together. Today is our anniversary. The moment we met is the moment we mark as our anniversary, because right off the bat we were attracted to each other and drawn to each other. We've lived together for four of those months, mainly because I was out of the city at university for the first four. We couldn't be happier living together, sometimes I feel like we're already married, and that's a good thing. But I just wish that I could take back a few things that have happend.

When we started going out, I said alot of things that I shouldn't have because I was insecure with myself and didn't know how to deal with it. She's gotten over that though, as much as anyone can in a few months. A couple months ago my dog died though, and that's the one thing that I wish I could change.

Both are families are a little fucked up, her's is full of workaholic hardasses, mine's full of nutjobs. Literally. My mom is a 16 year old emotionally and maturity wise, my dad suffers from anxiety so much that the smallest changes to his everyday life cause him to change into a panicy mess. I'd never grieved before for loved ones who have died. I've had three grandfathers, a great grandmother and now a dog all die in my lifetime, and because I don't feel connected to my family, I can't grieve in front of them, and that's been very hard on me when it's come to the funerals. My dad's odd habits don't help either; even though I've never truly admitted to myself how perverse they actually are. More on that later though.

I got the call a couple hours afterwards that my dog had died, so my girlfriend rushed me to the other end of town at 10pm where my parents were so I could be there. I walked in and saw my dead dog, rigor mortis already long set in, lying on my mom's lap. It's at this point that I can only say that I lose my mind, because I pick up the dog's body and take her into my room for the next three hours so that I can be alone and say goodbye. I hold her, stroke her ears, and cradle her stiff little body in my arms. I can't get it into my head that my first little dog is dead. And all this time my girlfriend is sitting there with me, watching me do all of this. After I put the body away I was fine, and have ever since. I've finally had closure with a loved one in my life. That's something that I've never had before, and because of all of this I'm never going to have to act that way again. What's worse though, is that my dad was away at the time, and he loved this dog with all of his heart. When he got back he went nuts. If i went insane, then he visited some abyss of psychosis that I've never even dreamed of. My parents kept the dog's body first on a cooling grate in the hallway for three nights, then kept her body in the fridge for another five. Not a freezer, not in a plastic bag, just wrapped up in a blanket in their fridge. Every single night he took her out and held her for hours, because he could accept that she was gone and couldn't deal.

Ever since that happend, I know that in the back of my mind that's what my girlfriend sees, at least in part, when she looks at me. She's accepted that I did it, she knows my reasoning for it, but she's afraid that I'll do it again. She hates my parents for how they've lived their lives and how they've treated my grandmother and myself. The thing that hurts me and scares me the most is that she thinks that I'm going to be my father, because to a lesser extent I did the same thing that he did. It bothers me so much because I've always been afraid of that too, because we look almost exactly alike and we do share some of the same habits. She can't understand why it hurts me so when she brings it up. It's her way of dealing, if she didn't bring it up then she'd be repulsed by the very sight of me. She's going to keep bringing it up until she's sure that it's not how I always act; that's what she thinks, that when my grandmother or parents die, I'm going to hold their cold, hard bodies for hours. I can understand why that scares her. I just wish that it wouldn't take my loved ones dying to show her that that's not how I always act. I wish so very, very much that I could have a chance to redo what happend, to go back as I am now and just say goodbye and leave it at that, without the insanity. God I wish it so much, because I know this is going to be brought up again and again, until someone close to me dies and she can be sure that I'm not going to do the same thing. I wish I'd known beforehand that she would react like this. I wish she wouldn't keep saying that I was 'manhandling and manipulating' the body. That's what I was doing, I just hate the words. I wish that we could both forget. I wish so many things.