Anonyblog

Magogo the Singing Dancing Macarena Monkey

Magogo lay in his bed with his head under the covers. He had not been out of the luxury apartment in six days. Furthermore he had not had a bowel movement in five days.He let out one tiny fart,probably no more than a cubic centimeter of hydrogen peroxide. He then moved his feet up and down in an effort to waft the noxious gas towards his sensitive nose. Ah, the sweet smell of his own flatulence comforted him. Suddenly there was a knock at the door. He panicked. Who could it be he thought as he grabbed for his Co2 pistol. Surely the post deleter would never have the intestinal or mental fortitude to confront him in any verbal or personal way. No. That would not do for Ricky Finklestein. He would always remain in the back alley close to the garbage dumpsters. He slowly advanced to the window and peeked out. He was astonished to see a Harrier jet parked in the street. But he could not help notice the beautiful Magogo at his door.

"Yeah,what up sista?"

"I am Jamima Magogo. You are in danger."

"Yo Sho nuff is one fine bitch Jamima. Yo got's some fine ass Magogo booty a hangin off Yo ass."

"Well,there's more to you than His Excellency led me to believe. Put that thought on hold for now. Professor Magugu was a spy planted by Indy the Great. We have taken care of him but you must leave this city. You must go back to Zimbabwe and motivate His Excellency to make some kind of a war plan. He cannot hunt and fish for the rest of his life neglecting his responsibilities. Help him Magogo or you will all be destroyed."

"Uh,whats with the jet on de front lawn? Yo knows my landlord gonna pitch a bitch about dat. We's gwine to have to re-sod(you know how it's pronounced don't you PD?) the yard."

"Magogo! That is Vador! Don't you remember from Bitch About Stuff when he rescued you before!? He's here to help you! You must leave this city now. Forget about your education. I will tutor you. I will teach you all that you need to know!."

"He gwine to take me in de jet?"

"There is no room. Call the Kody an have him arrange for your travel. We must go now."

As she said this she turned slowly,slightly exposing her battery compartment to the hapless ape.

Oh my goodness,he thought. Fuck Boston. Fuck Harvard. Fuck Berklee. Fuck de Post Deleter. Das what I want's to get into!"

He placed a call to His Esteemed Eminence Excellency Kody R Bear. But there was no response as it was well past dark on the other side of the world.

THE POST DELETER SUCKS DONKEY PENIS

ADDITIONALLY, HE LETS HIS DOG FUCK HIM IN THE ANUS

This is lame

Why did you guys have to go and kill the site? I hope its not dead, and that there are still people out there, but I don't think that there are nearly as many as there used to be. What is your problem?

THE POST DELETER SUCKS MONKEY PENIS

KODYBEAR

His Esteemed Eminence Excellency Kody R Bear lay by the fire pit on his personal Zebra rug picking the bones of an Impala he had killed the day before. His cell phone rang and Magogo's image-likeness appeared on the LCD .

Yes Magogo? What is it? I'm rather busy.

Well Yo Excellency it's de post Deleter. He back.

Magogo! I sent you to school hoping that you would develop some executive ability! Increase Vile Toxins by twenty percent! How many times do I have to tell you these things. Now don't bother me again unless you have something important to report!

Yes Yo Eminence.

Magogo hung up muttering to himself,Yo Excellency dis,Yo Eminence dat. He was thinking that the Kody was right. He could spew vile toxins as good as anybody if he put his mind to it. He made a plan to continue to bait the Post Deleter. He knew that,like a child,he would greedily snatch up any bone that was thrown to him

VAPOR THE TERMINATOR

It is night time at Harvard Square as the Vaporhoverjet quietly lands in JFKenedy Park.
Kung-Fu Master Walker and Jamima take their positions in the brushy brambles and wait for Magugu the Provocateur Monkey to pass by as he heads for his favorite bar. They can see a furry figure approaching, he is crossing the bridge over the Charles River and heading down JFKenedy St. The imposter monkey is to busy watching young girls to notice that he is being followed. He heads into Grendel’s Den.

Meanwhile, Kung-Fu Master Walker and Jamima make their final plans and split up. Kung-Fu Master Walker heads to the back ally behind the bar and Jamima enters the bar through the front door. Once inside she locates Magugu. She moves close to him and using her charm engages him in conversation.

After several drinks Jamima flirts with Magugu and asks him if he would like to touch her monkey anus. Magugu can not help himself and reaches up her little monkey dress and puts his monkey finger in her monkey anus. He immediately gets a monkey hard-on. Jamima notices he is quite aroused and asks him if he wants to go out back and smoke some coaxial cable. She tells him that she has the best cable that he has probably ever put his lips on, it is Monster Cable. Fifty dollars for six feet, the best in the land. Soon they are headed out back for a couple of hits.

On the way to the back ally Jamima tells Magugu that there might be some monkey sex on the menu if he buys her a good strong drink when they get back in the bar. Jamima is a good looking magogo and Magugu can hardly walk straight, he is so excited that his erect monkey penis keeps getting in his way. They make their way out the back door and find a private spot. Jamima breaks out her cable pipe, packs it full and hands it to Magugu. He lights it and takes a huge hit, his head spins as he starts dancing the Macarena.

Just then Kung-Fu Master Walker sneaks up on Magugu and knocks the tar out of him. The fur begins to fly. Using his incredible Kung-Fu skills Master Walker makes quick work of the weak monkey. Double A batteries fall on the ground, Monkey arms and legs fly through the air. The monkey has the stuffing knocked out of him and dies.

After finishing their mission they clean up all of the monkey parts, fur, stuffing and batteries. They find a dumpster and throw the mutilated monkey inside.

Kung-Fu Master Walker and Jamima head to Magogo’s luxury apartment to let him know what has happened.

VAPOR THE TERMINATOR

Plan of Attack

It is night time at Harvard Square as the Vaporhoverjet quietly lands in JFKenedy Park.
Kung-Fu Master Walker and Jamima take their positions in the scrub brush and wait for Magugu the Provocateur Monkey to pass by as he heads for his favorite bar. They can see a furry figure approaching, he is crossing the bridge over the Charles River and heading down JFKenedy St. The imposter monkey is to busy watching young girls to notice that he is being followed. He heads into Grendel’s Den.

Meanwhile, Kung-Fu Master Walker and Jamima make their final plans and split up. Kung-Fu Master Walker heads to the back ally behind the bar and Jamima enters the bar through the front door. Once inside she locates Magugu. She moves close to him and using her charm engages him in conversation.

After several drinks Jamima flirts with Magugu and asks him if he would like to touch her monkey anus. Magugu can not help himself and reaches up her little monkey dress and puts his monkey finger in her monkey anus. He immediately gets a monkey hard-on. Jamima notices he is quite aroused and asks him if he wants to go out back and smoke some coaxial cable. She tells him that she has the best cable that he has probably ever put his lips on, it is Monster Cable. Fifty dollars for six feet, the best in the land. Soon they are headed out back for a couple of hits.

On the way to the back ally Jamima tells Magugu that there might be some monkey sex on the menu if he buys her a good strong drink when they get back in the bar. Jamima is a good looking magogo and Magugu can hardly walk straight, he is so excited that his erect monkey penis keeps getting in his way. They make their way out the back door and find a private spot. Jamima breaks out her cable pipe, packs it full and hands it to Magugu. He lights it and takes a huge hit, his head spins as he starts dancing the Macarena.

Just then Kung-Fu Master Walker sneaks up on Magugu and knocks the tar out of him. The fur begins to fly, double A batteries fall on the ground. The monkey has the stuffing knocked out of him and dies.

After finishing their mission they clean up all of the monkey parts, fur, stuffing and batteries. They find a dumpster and throw the mutilated monkey inside.

Kung-Fu Master Walker and Jamima head to Magogo’s apartment to tell him about what has happened.

Things I Don't Understand

What is the deal with roadside shrines? You know what I mean---you're driving along the highway and
you see these crosses with someone's name on them, indicating that someone has died as the result of
a traffic accident there. Sometimes there will be more than one if more than one person died in the accident.
There's one I see on the way home from work where three kids died in an accident resulting in the car catching
on fire and burning them to death. Horrible, horrible way to go. Apparently the grieving parent(s) come
by and decorate the site for every holiday. I can almost---**almost**---understand this, but honestly, it
is a bit disconcerting to drive by in October and see three crosses decorated with inflatable jack-o-lanterns
and ghosts, or in March with giant shamrocks and the like. This has been going on for at least 10 years.

So, okay, why do people do this? Some have suggested that the shrines serve as a reminder to drive safely,
but how is distracting a driver's attention away from the road ahead going to encourage safe driving? "Oh,
look, Martha! See the crosses by the side of the road? I bet we can read the name on th------whoops!" CRASH!

It certainly can't qualify as highway beautification, considering that fresh flowers are left to wilt and
turn brown, and plastic flowers fade after a while, making the shrines more like littering the highways than
beautifying them.

Is it to help the loved ones grieve their losses and move on? I can't imagine that seeing daily reminders of
a tragedy is going to help anyone move on.

What I really don't get is, why set these shrines up at all? If your uncle is murdered in a hold-up at the
7-11, you don't put up a shrine by the Slurpee machine. If your father has a heart attack and dies, you don't
put up a shrine in your hospital's coronary care unit. If your cousin dies of a drug overdose, you don't put
up a shrine in your local crackhouse. So...why?

Do you hear the music?

Sounds like a funeral procession.

Dah Dah Dee Dah Dah…Anonyblog is dead. Dah Dee Dee Dah

VAPOR THE TERMINATOR

Execution of plan "Thwart INDY"

Vapor has always cared for Magogo The Singing Dancing Macarena Monkey. The monkey’s intoxicated antics had always made him laugh. Vapor thinks back to the good times had with his comrade Kody. How they would joke and tease that stupid monkey in the domination dungeon. Vapor was Vador The Dominator back then and was quite mean. Many things have changed and Vador is now Vapor The Terminator. He is still a superhero and there is work to do. He sends Kody a text message. Now he is highly motivated to get this mission started.

Vapor has worked through the night to bring the Vaporlair and the Vaporhoverjet back online. Young Master Walker wakes to find his mentor, Vapor, working diligently. Vapor has completely cleaned and organized the Vaporlair. All of the secret weapons are in their correct place. The Vaporhoverjet is on the launch-pad. Vapor is polishing the windscreen with some of those great little blue towels that you can steal from the gas station.

After giving the Vaporhoverjet a complete tune-up and washing Vapor and Kung-Fu Master Walker climb in for a systems check. For thirty-seven minutes they worked with the systems and finally were able to fire off the main thrust engines. The Vaporhoverjet must be in ship shape for The Plan to work.
Now all systems onboard the Vaporhoverjet are up and running. Vapor decides to take it out for a test run. Master Walker stays back at the Vaporlair to monitor the flight. After a short flight all systems check out. The Vaporhoverjet is ready for a mission.

Vapor joins Master Walker and Jamima in the kitchen for flapjacks with butter and maple syrup, bacon, coffee and fruit juice. This is a welcome meal after being up all night dusting and tuning.

Vapor tells Jamima his plan to thwart INDY. Jamima is a secret covert agent specializing in disguise and deception. Being a negroidal woman-servant and quite good looking, she will be able to infiltrate the ranks at Harvard. Jamima will disguise herself as a Magogo and deceive the Professor of the real Magogo’s Macaerna class.

Jamima will use her feminine skills to distract the Professor. She will be irresistible and the Professor will not be able to help himself after she lets him touch her monkey anus. All of INDY’s imposters have an anal fixation. This will be the Magogo imposter’s down fall. The promise of large hits of cable and sex will be more than the imposter can stand. What INDY does not know is that once you are a Magogo, a Magogo you will be. Only Jamima can resist the ways of the Magogo. All others who try and impersonate the monkey fall victim to its ways.

Kung-Fu Master Young Master Walker will transport Jamima, in the Vaporhoverjet, to Harvard and help execute the plan. Additionally, he has an important role to play. Vapor will stay in the Vaporlair to monitor and command the mission.

The three heroes sit at the breakfast table and discuss the details of their master plan.
A Vaporfone ring tone pierces the morning air. This is a ring tone that he has not heard for a long time.
Could it be the KODYBEAR?.....................................

VAPOR THE TERMINATOR

Vapor The Terminator Takes stock of the situation.

He has been in semi-retirement since the Great Turd War of 2003-04.
In that war a marvelous web-site was destroyed. Many fine bloggers were temporarily shut down.

As it was then, when Vapor was Vador,Vapor is the protector of the innocent monkey.

Vapor goes to his closet, while looking at his spandex superhero suit he wonders,
Is it time to come out of retirement? Is the monkey in deep trouble? Where are my superhero boots? Will the Vaporhoverjet start? Where are the keys?

There is so much for Vapor to do in preparation of his mission to save the monkey.
He takes his Dominator Hood in his hand and thinks, this will not do. He is not a Dominator as before, he is now a Terminator. He must have a new Cowl. He must make a plan to protect the monkey.

Vapor enters his kitchen and begins cooking the evening meal for his trusted companion, boy wonder Kung Fu Master, young Master Walker. Tonight they will be eating chicken sauté with rice and broccoli. During the meal Vapor tells the boy wonder about the pending danger to Magogo. Young Master Walker agrees that something must be done to protect the monkey. They decide to go to the Vaporlair directly after the evening meal. Their house-servant Jamima will clean the kitchen after they leave.

Once in the Vaporlair the boy wonder and Vapor realize there is much work to be done. Bringing the Vaporlair back up to speed will take some time. After knocking down cobwebs and locating his desk Young Master Walker sits in front of his laptop. Vapor starts up his new desktop and views his collection of secret weapons.

They begin to plan………………………….

VAPOR'S KITCHEN

TODAY’S RECIPE

Thank You,
Master Chef Vapor

KODYBEAR

Ther KodyBear and Magogo the Singing Dancing Macareana Monkey stood silently in the bush on the banks of the Gache Gache River. They were surrounded by elephants. The nearest bull began to paw the ground with it's feet and flap it's ears,alerting the Kodybear to the possible danger.

"Dat a nice tusker der Yo Excellency."

Yes Magogo I agree but we're much too close to them and I'm a little worried because we have no cover. Let's get out of here and go back to camp. I'm in no hurry to shoot an elephant."

"Yasser. We can finds you a betta one dan dat."

As they drove along the banks of Kariba Lake the Kody marveled at the hippos and crocodiles and the herds of Impala moving like schools of fish across the plain.

"Magogo,what is your shelf life?"

"Oh,about a hundred years I guess"

"Have you given anymore thought to getting an education?"

"Well Yes Yo Eminence . It's a generous offer on Yo part. But I ain't know what to study."

"Well you sing and dance don't you? Why don't you consider a musical education. Money is not a concern Magogo. I suggest that you enroll yourself in Berklee College of Music. I will pay all expenses."

"Dat a lot of money Yo Radiance. An besides what if Indy decide to come whoopin up on Yo ass again?"

"I'll handle Indy Magogo. You've proven yourself of no more use to me than the goddamn yellow baboons. I cannot emphasize the imporrtance of an education to you. You talk like a goddamn nigger. Your completely useless to me. I'll not have it anymore! You will apply to Berklee and you will go to Boston. Kody Bear Enterprises will pick up the check. Is that good enough for you? I also want you to take some English courses. Apply at Harvard as well. Just trying to have a conversation with you makes me ill. I'd be better off trying to talk to an opossum. I will stay here on the concession. I'm quite happy here you know."

"When does I have to leave Yo Eminence.?

"Just go Magogo. They will accept you as long as the check is good. Rent yourself an apartment on Haviland street. Enjoy the city and leave me be. I'm boring myself to death just talking to you. I will stay here and think of new Kody Brand Vile Toxins. I will crush Indy the Great in your absence! I will be King Kody! There is something to be said for being prolific!"

*******Breaking News********* Kodybear is Brilliant!

Why is KodyBear so enlightening? Maybe it's a lack of sodomy--you can't imagine the Bear has so many friends in real life.
. Or possibly he's sexually satisfied and it enhances his creativity. Maybe he's just a high-functioning genius Please post your theories as to why Anonyblog's most prolific poster is also its most brilliant.. PS Kodybear please post on a daily basis and please bring back Indy the Great as soon as possible. We're just a group of bored college students with nothing to say. We live every day just to read your brilliant posts. We love you Kody! We want to come to the Gache Gache River and worshiop you as our BearTurd God!

*****BREAKING NEWS*****

HIS EXCELLENCY KODY R BEAR AND MAGOGO SPOTTED IN THE SUNSHINE CITY

BREAKING NEWS INTERVIEWS THE BEAR IN THE LOBBY OF THE MIEKLES HOTEL

Is it true Your Excellency that the Kody Kave has been over taken by Indy the Great?

Well it's possible. But we've not heard anything recently. He may have abandoned it already.

It's rumoured that you've been banned in two thirds of the known world. Is this true?

Lies! All Lies! As you can see I'm here and flourishing.

Your Eminence in August of this year you deposed Benedict XVI Joseph Ratzinger and proclaimed yourself a living God. Are we to understand now that you aspire to become a BearTurd God?

Yes indeed,I did. Magogo here was much amused by his pathetic groveling. I think he's working in a McDonalds somewhere. I have given the BearTurd God idea some thought but that's about as far as it's gone. It's really not practical.

How do you feel about being defeated by someone who wears a turd crown?

Well! Why don't you just get right to the point! The battle was lost but the war is not over! Nothing is over! How dare you! You snivelling little shit! Get out of here! All of You!

Magogo wanted to spend the night in the City.

"Youv'e got to be kidding me",His Excellency said. "I'm as white as a gallon of milk and you think I'm staying here? Times have changed Magogo. Now lets get to the land rover and hit the road. I'll drive."

The Kody hated driving on Robert Mugabe Boulevard. As he approached the Presidential Palace he spotted the roadblock. The Zimbabwe national policeman approached the land rover and said in a slow,deep,thick voice,"We are so pleased to see you. Passports?"

As he handed their passports over he whispered to Magogo,"He'd probably cut my throat if he knew what I really thought about him. Keep your eye on that evil thing."

Everything being in order they headed for the City Market in Chinhoyi to get supplies. His Excellency began to relax a little more on the way to Karoi. The closer he got to the concession,the better he felt.

"Magogo boot up the laptop and give me a report."

"Well Yo Excellency it real quiet. Maybe Indy he done abandon de kave cause dey ain't nuffin here."

"Listen Magogo. I want you to go out tonight and shoot a Kudu. I think it only fitting that we have Kudu liver our first night back. After that I don't care what you do. Practice spewing vile toxins or something.

Late that evening,his Bear belly full,the Kody lay vodka drunk by the fire pit. He could here the constant flicking of Magogo's lighter and smell the burning plastic and cable coming from the monkey's chalet. Poor creature,he thought,suffering so with addiction. His mind was filled with Kody Brand Vile Toxins and the usual thoughts of sodomy and world domination. He stood up and slammed down the last of the Grey Goose and bellowed, "I will take my vengeance upon you Indy!" He looked up at the sky and once again the constellations were all upside down.

White House declares Anonyblog DEAD!

NEWS-FLASH

Kody Bear and clan BANNED in 33 of the 50 States, all across Canada, 3/4 of Asia and Russia.
South America still trying to decide.

Soup and Parsley,baby!

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, SHAWTY!

SHAWTY LOOK GOOD IN DAT WYT TEE! REPPIN SOUTH DAKOTA FA LYF! DATZ WAZZUP! I GATCHA BACK,DA'!

Yeah, sure, Happy Thanksgiving to everyone except ME!

Did everyone have a good Thanksgiving? Great – good for you!
I’ve been sitting around the phone for about a month now, waiting for a very important phone call. I’ve even kept the volume down on the TV just to make sure I could hear the phone ring with one of the most important phone calls I may ever receive. I have even resorted to having food and other items (toilet paper…etc) delivered just so I wouldn’t miss the phone call.

I feel really pathetic right now- knowing that I could have gone to the relatives for “Thanksgiving”, but NO, I sat around waiting for the phone call WHICH I JUST FOUND OUT WASN”T GOING TO HAPPEN. That’s right…the phone call I was waiting for should have happened two or three weeks ago…AND IT NEVER CAME! Why, WHY, I tell you why…

I had amassed all the camera gear and surround sound equipment together with fully charged batteries…waiting for the big war…the MAJOR BATTLE of the year between my Master – His Esteemed Eminence KING Kody R. Bear and his foe.

But NO, no phone call, I missed it, the battle took place and I was never told it was taking place. Did anyone call me to tell the battle was over…NO.

It wasn’t until this morning (after Thanksgiving) that I decided to call Kody at the Super-Secret-Kody-Kave-Komplex to check in with HIS EMINENCE, when after five rings an answering machine in the kave picks up the phone and states “Hello, you have reached INDY THE GREAT’s answering machine, I’m sorry I can’t take your phone call at this time as I am busy eating gir……, please leave a message and I will return your call as soon as possible”

I HUNG UP! Damn it. I suspected that what had happened was that King Kody got too enthralled with the “bear-porn” on the new IMAX theater screen with surround sound I had installed in the kave over the summer- and he didn’t know he lost the battle until it was too late.

Yeah…call me stupid…MR. Stupid

THANKSGIVING IN VAPOR’S KITCHEN

All was quiet in Vapor’s kitchen today as his parents celebrated their Golden Wedding Anniversary. Vapor and his grandmother (93 yrs), father, mother, sister’s mother in-law, two brothers, two sisters, brother in-law, sister in-law, two daughters, one son, two nephews and niece dined at PI and enjoyed Master Chef Lee Miller’s fine cooking. Fun was had by all. There were a few tears shed during the toast made to the honored couple. Family members traveled from some distances to ensure all children of the honored couple would be there. Younger daughter baked a marvelous two layer, two tiered cake which was enjoyed by all.

I would like to take this opportunity to wish all here at Anonyblog, no matter what your beliefs or political stands, whether you like me or not,

Happy Thanksgiving everyone,

Master Chef Vapor

KODYBEAR

His Esteemed Excellency Kody R Bear sat in the upstairs bar in the Johannesburg International Airport drinking a Castle beer. He howled in laughter as he watched Magogo,who had gone to the lavatory,careen through the crowd and crash into a table full of safari types,spilling their drinks before falling to the floor. The only thing that amused him more was the PD.

"Hey mate! You must put a leash on your monkey before he buggers up the whole whole place! Bloody evil thing that one!"

"Magogo! Get over here and have a seat and sober up before you take a bashing! See if you can keep from wrecking the place while I make this call to Dr. Wesphyn. Anxious to here news of the Kody Kave,he placed the call.

"Your Eminence BearTurd! We're so pleased to here from you! We thought you had all been killed by the skeleta minia.

"Don't get smart with me. What is the news Doctor?"

"Good and bad Your Excellency. The good news is that the FATmouth/Facist/Deleter regime has been nearly obliterated. Casualties of war you might say. With the Lord's blessing I might add."

"Really?" Do they say nothing then?"

"They say nothing unless you give them something to say Your Esteemed Eminence."

"Very good. Manufacture a small army of Walking KodyBears armed with vile toxins and crush them."

I wouldn't advise that Your Eminence.There wouldn't be any sport in it. Besides they are easily manipulated and may be of some future use against Indy The Great. Which brings me to the bad news. His army has completely over run The Kody Kave. Regrettably,he ordered the eight hundred thousand Macarena Monkeys to be burned alive. He has even had the audacity to start construction of a replica of the The Arch De Triomphe in front of the kave."

"This is more serious than I----Stop it Magogo! Sit down! Well in any case you must help me make a plan to defeat him.

"Well Sir,you could cut off his food supply. I suggest we confine all of the world's women under the age of eighteen. You could have Magogo organize the-----

"Silence! Magogo couldn't organize a rape in a whore house! Keep thinking. I'll need a place to take over and an army capable of dealing with----Damn you Magogo! Can't you see I'm on the phone! Now listen Wesphyn! I'm going to be on holiday. You will find a solution. Don't call me. I'll call you."

"Yes Your Excellency Sir. Where will you be?"

"I'll be basking in the light of my own radiance. That's all I can tell you for now. Magogo! Finish your beer and look sharp! Our flight boards in forty five minutes. Let's head to the gate. There is always the chance that we could have been followed so just try and blend in with the crowd and look inconspicuous."

"Yes Yo Excellency."

Deep conscious sequence # 1 -LEARNING LESSONS-.

The study of the psyche- ie. “who we are”.
This is both a deep look into to your mind and I need your help to refine this.

Premise: OPPOSITES!

Are there only “opposites” of everything – And you are “that” which is the middle – “that” which is neither?

In this world- that which all beings know- we can find, and defined, those things which transcend language – we can express happiness and hate to another culture and they to us.
Even deeper - One must have opposites to all that we relate to:

I tell you to look out over fields of “beautiful” flowers…what is “beautiful”… it is relative to that which you know and that which you can contrast “beautiful” to.

I purpose that, to have the greatest level of appreciation- one should have been able to have the experience of that which is opposite, and the more one has of the comprehension of that which is opposite- the greater one has of the comprehension” being”/ knowing – that which he/she is perceiving.

The field of “beautiful” flowers… if everywhere you looked … all you could see is the flowers… and there is nothing in your “being” , mind, life experience- of which is “ugly”, all you have ever seen and experience are those flowers…then you can not see/ perceive the beauty of them because of the lack of contrast.

The greater one’s contrast of opposites- then the greater the total experience and “being” / “full comprehension” we / you can have: and thus “we” / “you” are defined by that -to make up that which is – you-.

DO YOU WANT ME TO COUNITUE?

Mr. Richards and the "N" word.

I posted this as comment to another but I am going to post this again.

Mr. Richards made comments to hecklers because they were heckling him. It seems to me that the hecklers were being as rude as Mr. Richards and got exactly what they deserved. When they got what they were given they hid behind the Minority Card.

There has to be a time when everyone becomes fed up with others hiding behind the minority card. Darn it, if you act like a jerk you should get treated like a jerk, NO MATTER WHO YOU ARE.

Face it, everyone was wrong here!

WHITE JEW COMEDIAN CHIMPS OUT AND CALLS SPADES NIGGERS WHILE BEING HECKLED

Did Michael Richards step over the line?

I believe in free speech but this man just lost his cool. The word Nigger, used properly, has been shown to have its place in dialect. Many are offended by the use of the word Nigger in any context. African-American people have clearly given the word Nigger a place in our society. Many comedians regularly use the word Nigger in their comedy skits and routines. This opens the door for anyone to use the word Nigger in the right context. It seems as though Mr. Richards used the word Nigger to humiliate some of the audience at a comedy club. He also used a racial slur when he said “Fifty years ago you would have been hanging upside down in a tree with a fork up your ass”. In my opinion using the word Nigger while talking about lynching or hanging an African-American from a tree is improper.

One example of the proper use of the word Nigger would be when describing the African-American Negroidal scum who drives around in a new Cadillac and sells crack cocaine for a living while the mother of his illegitimate child collects welfare. While this problem is not restricted to Niggers alone, many white Nigger want to be punks (Wiggers) are out there also, Niggers dominate welfare fraud and the crack cocaine business. There are many other examples of the proper use of the word Nigger. One could write a short novel concerning the subject.

Nevertheless, in my opinion, Mr. Richards went too far when he called the African-American hecklers Niggers and referred to hanging African-Americans in trees.
Shame, shame.

JUST AN OBSERVATION

It looks as though Admin has come in and cleaned up his web-log. If you were paying attention you would have noticed in doing this he has deleted posts that he did not want on the board. For those of you who complain about “Indy-Kody-Vapor" posts, please note that the Admin did not delete any of their posts. Thus, one would have to perceive that the posts made by “Indy-Kody-Vapor” fall somewhere within the rules that Admin has set forth. I know that this does not mean that some of you will stop complaining. It should though, give you an idea of where you stand.

Here is an idea, those of you who spend your time complaining, please post something, anything intelligent and thoughtful. Help brighten up the outlook on the board. Do not be afraid to express yourself.

Anonymous Blogger

To the poster below ...

You are boring and predicatable. In fact, entities such as yourself do not only exist on sites such as this; you are EVERYWHERE. You have absolutely no imagination, so all you can do is stretch open your tight little asshole, remove your finger, then jab out a three line paragraph with it about how crap everyone else's post is. Whereupon you will replace said finger in afore-mentioned location until such time as you need it to point at somebody else. Here's $0.02 ... Go and buy yourself a clue, moron.

- GPR

PS Next time, do us a favour and DON'T stop by.

Impressive

I stopped in anonyblog to see what was up and found the same old same old. The only difference is it seems to be much worse than the last time I was here (about 4 months ago). I would bet this site has zero new traffic and about 6 to 10 of the same old posters posting the same old crap.

Murdering scum!!!

A PERSON'S A PERSON NO MATTER HOW SMALL!!!!!
GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU, AND IN HELL YOU WILL BE ABORTED OVER AND OVER, LEGS AND ARMS TORN FROM YOU FOR ALL ETERNITY IN A CIRCLE OF FOREVER. THIS IS WHAT HELL IS, IS THE ETERNAL LIVING OF THE EVILS YOU PETUATED ON OTHERS. WHEN YOU ARE IN HELL WITH YOUR EYES SUCKED OUT AND SCREAMING BUT NO VOICE COMING FROM YOUR NECK, MAYBE YOU WILL REMEMBER WHAT YOU DID TO YOUR BABY!

WE'VE GONE THE WRONG WAY BABY: Feminism's Proud destruction of Mankind

Resa LaRu Kirkland is an avid military historian, with her main focus being on the Korean War and its forgotten warriors. She was born in Arizona in 1966, and has lived in northern Idaho, El Paso Texas, Pocatello, IDand the Evergreen State, where she currently resides. She is married with two sons whom she is teaching the evils of political correctness. She was given the nickname AMERICA'S WAR CHICK by her beloved Korean War Vets, and uses it proudly to this day! Her other favorites from her "men" are The Pitbull, Hellraiser, Tiger, D-Day. Her favorite names given to her by those who oppose her views are Capitalist Pig, Brass-Bottomed Bitch, and H-Bomb. Her husband and boys just call her Turbo. Resa loves power-lifting, snowmobiling, swimming, boating, four-wheeling, and most activities of any nature. She has a degree in education and is anxious start work on her graduate degree in military history.

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Resa LaRu Kirkland
September 7, 2006

I'm ashamed to be a woman. I feel less for it... like I don't quite measure up. Now understand, men have never made me feel less. No, this inferiority complex began about 35 years ago with a little thing called Feminism. Feminism has made me ashamed of my sex-as a group and individually.

There was a time when women deserved respect-because we are mothers, because of our natural softness and tender feelings, because we have been the ones who raised up righteous leaders of good nations for centuries now. We dropped the ball on that most vital role, not men. Consequently, we don't deserve the respect that men-yes men!--have bestowed upon us any longer. It is the day care facility-institutions-that raises our children now, and the result has been the most horrific social experiment history has ever seen.

In the sixties, women began taking the easy way out. Why? Because Motherhood is a damned hard thing to do. It is 24/7/365. There is no pay, no immediate gratification, little recognition, and more often than not, no appreciation until you yourself become a mother. When you go to work, you get to dress nicely. You have a schedule that you actually keep. People do what you tell them to do. You get to speak to and with adults, have conversations that have meaning. You get regular breaks, and no one is peeing or spitting up on you, throwing tantrums, breaking your things, or calling Grandma to get his way. And while there is truth to the fact that society has both revered and ridiculed that which comes naturally to women-tenderness-it is women-not men--who have inflicted the most damage. Let me explain why.

Men have always been in awe of the female form-not just physically, but spiritually and emotionally as well. While they may burst with pride over their strength and snicker at the physical "weakness" of women when compared to men, they hold in that realm of mystical and reverent those attributes of femininity that are not as comfortable within themselves, and they marvel about them in private moments. They reveal this wondering in ways that are at times misunderstood, but nevertheless bespeak of the awe they feel toward the female sex.

My all time favorite saying about the power women possess was revealed by author Samuel Johnson in the 18th century: Nature has given women so much power that the law has very wisely given them little. Now before feminists start ripping tendons and ligaments with their typical knee-jerk reaction to this example, look again. This is a statement and recognition of the power and strength men recognize within women-power they envy, strength they admire, and tenderness they crave. This is a statement of respect and recognition for women, not belittlement.

Jump forward to the 20th century, and the advent of militant feminism that took hold of our culture. Now understand, there isn't a person-male or female-that I know who doesn't believe that women were mistreated in the past, or that they deserve rights of voting, work, etc. So let's just toss that ridiculous argument from the get-go. No, this is about the fact that these Stalinistic Types who decided that women deserved better--not just equal-treatment than men have overtaken, destroyed, and even in the face of logic and reason-and their own case studies and evaluations--turned to typical female histrionics to bludgeon society into doing what they say.

This was driven home with a resounding wham! when Bernard Goldberg-a man, no less--talked about the final straw that made him decide he could no longer play his part in the Liberal Lineup that has overtaken the media. In his best-selling book Bias, Goldberg states that there had been little things for years that had gnawed at his conscience, but it was when he saw what was happening to children-at the behest of women, no less-that he knew he could pretend no more.

Goldberg only gave voice to what we've all seen for decades now, but have become too Politically Castrated to say. It is the horrifying trend in our children's feelings, lives, and behavior. You see, when we began giving into the bullying tactics of the feminist movement that used guilt and "Second Class Status" brainwashing to get women to leave the home, it resulted in our children going en masse to day cares or coming home alone. Suicide rates, sexual diseases, poor academics, increased violence and drug use, not to mention less formal criminal behavior such as arguing a great deal, deliberate and even gleeful cruelty, explosive behavior, too much talking, too much fighting have all been the result of the selfishness of the "Woman-Good-Man-Bad" mentality of those who pay lip service only to it being "for the children" when what they really intend to say is "Mine! Mine! Mine! Now! Now! Now!"

The real kicker to this is that the Gloria Steinems of the world don't even realize what they were saying by getting women to leave the home for the "man's world." It was the women of the world-not the men-who force fed women the notion that what comes naturally to men-to conquer the outside world-was more important, better, more deserving than what comes naturally to women. They were actually demeaning femininity by their own words, and were too foolish to even realize it. The shame of my sex is that we bought into it. The shame of the male sex is that they did too.

Society has paid a dear price for women choosing to listen to these wretched individuals. Women are now in a far worse position than they were 100 years ago; back then, they didn't have many other choices than to be a wife and mother. Today, if they want to be a wife and mother, they can't unless they marry a very rich man. Feminism has enslaved us into the "SuperWoman" role-an impossible place to live. But I have a sick feeling that that is exactly their goal. You see, being pro-abortion isn't enough. They want motherhood and wife-dom to be so difficult, so back-breaking, so agonizing in modern living that women will choose not to marry and have children. For those who still don't grasp it, let me say it in plain speech: Feminism is the party of the "anti-child."

"Female Empowerment" was the shameful fantasy. Now for the harsh reality. Sisters, your babies are killing each other. They are having babies at younger ages and in record numbers in a desperate search for that unconditional love they couldn't find in the myriad of minimum wage babysitters and daycares they had growing up. They are turning to gangs and drugs to ease the pain of loneliness and the longing for Mommy-a longing which is innate, necessary, and good-and it is our fault. Our children are suffering; their tender feelings have waxed cold and all signs of humanity are dying off in agonizing death throes, and we women are the cause. Women. The givers of life have turned against their own offspring in a vain quest for self-fulfillment. It is madness.

Society became this way because we women allowed ourselves to feel ashamed for having children and raising them right, and that was wrong. It's time for the New Feminist Revolution. No longer can our children-or society-abide the general female answer and shrug: "Well, it's the day we live in... whatcha gonna do?"

Here's what you're gonna do. Women, go home. Get rid of the huge mortgage and move into a trailer. It's not the neighborhood-or village, idiot!-that raises a good child. Have two cars? Get rid of one and deal with the annoyance of having to drive more. It's not the car that makes the family. Fancy clothes and vacations? Trivial and silly... those won't be what your child remembers. Be the one who drops him off and picks him up from school. Those precious moments laughing and talking will always be remembered, I guarantee it. Be in the kitchen, filling a warm home with delicious smells, sounds, and memories, and bring the whole family in to make dinner again, cleaning up together afterwards and bonding over pot roast. It is simple, it is time tested, it is true. The hand that rocks the cradle did-at one time-rule the world. The cradle is silent because the hand is at work and the baby at an institution. Sisters, go home-too much is at stake. Your babies are dying and killing, and the only one who can stop this infanticide is you. The power is-and always has been-yours. Take it back now... it's almost too late.

Keep the faith, bros-and sis-and in all things courage.

Women are the real "man beaters"!!

The latest research debunks outdated feminist rhetoric that men are evil predators and women innocent victims in DV. Wife-beating is quickly becoming an old wives' tale and being replaced by hubby-beating. Currently both genders have evened up at a 28% chance of being hit. But in the younger generation, women have actually EXCEEDED men in physically assaulting the other (1/3 vs 1/4)!!!

Studies shatter myth about abuse
By Karen S. Peterson, USA TODAY

WASHINGTON — It is not just men who hit women. Women hit men, too. And the latest research shows that ignoring the role women play in domestic violence does both women and men a disservice.

There is little doubt that women get hurt more than men. She may slap him. But then he may hit her harder or more often.

By not understanding the mutual role they often play, women are at great risk for injury, new studies show.

Still, the newest findings challenge the feminist belief that "it is men only who cause violence," says psychologist Deborah Capaldi of the Oregon Social Learning Center. "That is a myth."

The number of women who hit first or hit back is "much greater than has been generally assumed," Capaldi says. She says she is surprised by the frequency of aggressive acts by women and by the number of men who are afraid of partners who assault them.

Capaldi and two other female researchers call for a re-evaluation of treatment programs nationwide. Such programs focus on men and ignore women. Men are court-ordered into some type of rehabilitation, and their women are told in support groups or shelters that they had nothing to do with the violence, Capaldi says.

"Prevention and treatment should focus on managing conflict and aggression for both young men and women," Capaldi says. Each needs to understand the role both play while still putting a "special responsibility" on the man, who can inflict greater injury.

The three women did different studies but presented them as a team recently to a conference sponsored by the Society for Prevention Research. The National Institutes of Health sponsored much of the work.

The researchers emphasize they are not blaming women. "We are not saying anybody is at fault," says psychologist Miriam Ehrensaft of Columbia University. "But new data is emerging that says women are also involved in aggression. If we do not tell women that, we put them at risk."

Rita Smith of the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence is not convinced that men are afraid of abusive women. "That fear is a critical factor in any domestic violence situation. And the abuse is part of an ongoing pattern to control someone else's behavior."

Murray Straus, co-director of the Family Research Lab at the University of New Hampshire, has found both men and women are involved in physical aggression, but he emphasizes injury rates are not the same. "The likelihood of an injury to a woman requiring medical attention is much greater. Men cause more damage."

The little-talked-about involvement of women in mutual aggression with men is "the third rail of the domestic violence field," says Richard Gelles, dean of the University of Pennsylvania School of Social Work. "Touch it and you get electrocuted." Both he and Straus have done studies that caused fiery controversies.

Gelles says the lifetime risk of a woman being struck by a male intimate partner is about 28%. And "depending upon who is doing the survey and how you measure it, you could get numbers of up to 50%." But he says a man's lifetime risk of being struck by a woman is also about 28%.

Many researchers' findings in earlier, government-financed studies emphasize the man's role.

Patricia Tjaden's study for the non-profit Center for Policy Research, sponsored by two government agencies, questioned 8,000 men and 8,000 women. She found women three times as likely to be assaulted in some way over a lifetime by a male partner than the reverse, and seven to 14 times as likely to be attacked, including beaten, choked or threatened with a gun.

Different research tools and methods pick up on different kinds of intimate partner violence, Tjaden says. But still, she says, she has "always had trouble with the mutual-abuse argument. Where are all the male victims?" It is women, she says, who are subjected to "systematic terrorism."

The young are particularly prone to aggression. Erika Lawrence of the University of Iowa told the prevention conference that one-third of newlywed women and one-quarter of newlywed men engage in physical aggression.

The subject of partner violence is a minefield. Even defining it is controversial. Some call verbal abuse a form of battering. And all sorts of studies are done in all sorts of ways. Those based on crime statistics and reports from women's shelters tend to show dramatic aggression by men against women. (Gelles cautions that some men may not realize or admit they have been assaulted by a woman and may not report it as a crime or seek treatment.)

"Family conflict" studies may reflect a broader population, Straus says, and take into account lesser types of aggression that don't lead to arrests or broken limbs. These studies show about the same rates of aggression by men and women.

It is clear that women suffer physically more at the hands of men than the reverse, says Faye Wattleton of the Center for the Advancement of Women. But still she says it is good to bring new research to public attention. "I applaud the women who had the courage to present these findings. We don't make progress by suppressing the evidence."

These findings are also echoed in other recent studies, showing a fast progression in female violence through the last decade:

1988: The incidence of violence and acquaintance rape in dating relationships among college men and women. Journal of College Student Development, 29, 305-311. (A sample of actively dating college students <204 women and 140 men> responded to a survey examining courtship violence. Authors report that there were no significant differences between the sexes in self reported perpetration of physical abuse.)

2000: (Meta-analyses of sex differences in physical aggression indicate that women were more likely than men to "use one or more acts of physical aggression and to use such acts more frequently." In terms of injuries, women were somewhat more likely to be injured, and analyses reveal that 62% of those injured were women.)

2002: (Analyzing responses to the Conflict Tactic Scale and using a data set somewhat different from the previous 2000 publication, the author reports that women are more likely than men to throw something at their partners, as well as slap, kick, bite, punch and hit with an object. Men were more likely than women to strangle, choke, or beat up their partners.)

These statistical studies back up the personal observations I have made on the latest trend of "raging butches." So, why all these estrogen-fueled temper tantrums? I think what is really happening here is that women are more miserable and confused than ever in their new feminist-force fit roles. So, they seem faaarr more prone to sexual confusion, anxiety/depression requiring psychoactive meds and frustrated anger. Basically, in denying their true feminine natures, they have become VERY UNHAPPY CAMPERS, and lash out in every indirect manner imaginable! Cuz the more they suppress their basic gender instincts, the more they fight to get out!

KODYBEAR

His Esteemed Excellency Kody R Bear and Magogo the Singing Macarena Monkey Lounged in the first class section of SA Air. They were less than 15 minutes into the trans Atlantic flight.

"Did Yo bring any Bear porn,Yo Eminence?"

"Not one single film!! In fact----- Magogo. Look out the window down below. What the hell is that?

"Yo Excellence if you done wiffin been payin attention den you done would have noticed dat turd copter hoverin around de kave fo three days."

"Oh. yes of course I noticed it. It must have slipped my mind. See here Magogo. Some idiot has given me the most fantastic idea. I could be a BearTurd God! I mean really how difficult could it be? I guess if you can learn your Bible verses pretty good and have a flair for stock piling Bearturds. Well, I could probably make a pretty good living at it!"

"Well fo one thing I don't think dey is any Bears in South Africa"

"We don't have to stay in Africa Magogo. We can go anywhere we want! We can do anything we want!"

Magogo chuckled,"Yeah and we can say anything we want too!"

The Kody laughed and squealed in delight! "You sound like your ready to spew some vile toxins Magogo! I like that in a Macarena Monkey. I think we have a bright future ahead of us. I want you to have more of a role this time Magogo. You will be one hundred percent! I mean, didn't you come from the very forest where flinging feces was invented? Your kind did start that didn't they?"

"I don't know. It just come natural like to me and I knows when to do it. Kinda hard to explain."

Well,you just be ready to do that then. We will be safe for a while but this maniac will eventually find us"

"Yeah, but until dey duzz whont yo tells dat black bitch to bring us some bread and wine."

"Very good Magogo! Start slow and ramp it up later! Excellent!"

Great new men's equality site!!

Hey there is a great new blog promoting men's equality. It is called "liberal dyke hags suck and the link ishttp://md1992.blogspot.com. Check it out and let the guy named Martha(yes that is a real name in Afganistan for men) know you support what he is doing for our rights!!!

The GPR

OK children, let’s play a game called, “Tell and guess the truth (no really, guys)”. Here’s how it goes, I tell one piece of truth about myself, then I guess some truths about all of you and we see how right we can be. Come on, it’ll be fun! To get things going, I’ll tell TWO truths ... Here goes ...

About me:
1) I am the Great Post Restorer, and I lied, I have one alter-ego, namely Dr. Leon (of fill in the _________ infamy).
2) I have never deleted another’s post or changed a password.

About you:
1) Kodybear is an individual who writes Kodybear/Magogo/Indy stories only. He does not delete posts or change passwords.
2) Kody may also be Indy.
3) Crusader FATMouth is the post deleter.
4) Vapor and the post deleter are not the same entity.
5) The person who changed the password was not C-FATMouth/post deleter.
6) The person who posted the throbbing cock/steaming pussy thing and renamed the author as Admin was Vapor.
7) The post deleter had a wank at least once after deleting a bunch of posts.
8) Vapor has a massive hard-on for Kody, his “Bearboy” and has secret fantasies of visiting him in his cabin and exploring his man-hole (pronounced as one word).
9) The dragonlady is a male.
10) Mr Ig. stands for Mr Ignoramus.

Your turn ...

Good Morning Everybody

What do you all think about everyone that uses Anonyblog --- all “anti-clan” and all “Kody-Klan” ….all of us…get together somewhere…just to meet and talk and have a fun time? We could determine which large city is the closest point where we all could fly or drive to and meet for a fun filled weekend….you know… brunches, drinks, sight-seeing.

We could see the real person behind the bear, shake hands with Indy, give a hug to Mr. Post Deleter, get Admin’s autograph, get a group photo taken…

dragonlady says she will help settle the Great Debate. She will bring a ruler, and all the men---excuse me---all the MALES will line up and drop their pants. ***What’s that, dragonlady? Yes, you can bring your magnifying glass, too.*** Anyway, she says we’ll get this alpha male thing settled once and for all.

Hello everyone ...

I have a tiny little pickle for a penis, but I can ejaculate enormous gobs of sticky semen with it quite nicely. I think I'll do this tonight.

VAPOR'S KITCHEN

The anti-Klan bunch grows restless on this Friday eve.

On past Fridays they have spent much of their time deleting the posts of others and trying to rule the board. Knowing not what to do with themselves they hurl accusations and spout negativity. It is good. Victory is good. I only wish that KodyBear was around a computer so he could witness what our fine work has accomplished.

Tonight is a very good example of the typical anti-Klan behavior. See how they try and blame every action taken that they do not agree with on the bear. The bear was only around the computer for a short amount of time today. Long enough to leave one or two comments, that is all. Still the bear has been accused of changing the password and deleting posts.

On the other hand, Indy-GPR-Password Changer has had his way with all of the anti-Klan geeks for the last two days. It has been most entertaining watching all of the piss-ants running to Admin to tell on whoever. What a hoot. You know what they say, “If you cannot stand the heat get out of the kitchen”.

Welcome to Vapors Kitchen.

It is hot in here, can you handle it?
It is early on Friday night.
Let us see who can hang.

Thank You,
Master Chef Vapor

He thrust his huge throbbing cock into her we steaming pussy....

And then he came and that was it!!

Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain

The password is fine. No one has changed it. Jeeze, is this a new anti-clan tactic? Start screaming that the clan has changed the password when it hasn't been changed at all? Before you all start flooding Admin with emails, tattling on your percieved foe, check it out.

Bearboy didn't do it again!

Bearboy and I were riding through the mountains to his lodge, when we got there - the password had been changed, Please tell me how Bearboy changed the password when he wasn't near a computer! Is it mind control?
Looks like he knows how to push your buttons! If Kody and the Klan upset you so much, why do you keep coming back, I guess you like it!

Love you,

Have a nice day!

What are you talkin about??

Hey the password is working fine. Are you sure you pgged in correctly. check you cap lock key. I did fine>

ha ha hahah

I am the one. And you cannot do a damn thing about it you feebleminded little twit. You think you can have me banned but this site does not have that ability and never has or I would already be gone. So sit back and take it like a faggot that you are. hahahahahhaahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha I WIN!!!!!

Hey, did you hear about Melissa Etheridge on the news? They're saying she drowned.

Yup, they found her face down in Ricci Lake.

Lol...ok sorry, but I had to change the mood in here.

Great site for all men!!

Here is a great site for all men concerned about the feminist left and their liberal dyke hags that hate all men-http://verlch.blogspot.com. Go and show him your support men of America and the world!!!

RICKY FINKLESTEIN

Hi Everyone!

It is I, the Post Deleter Ricky Finklestein. I believe that everyone except me should be deleted, banned, and censored.

Interesting facts from Indy

In anatomy, the anus (from Latin ānus "ring, anus") is the external opening of the rectum. Closure is controlled by sphincter muscles. Feces are expelled from the body through the anus during the act of defecation, which is the primary function of the anus. Most animals — from simple worms to elephants and humans — have a tubular gut, with a mouth at one end and an anus at the other.

The anus is often considered a taboo part of the body, and is known by a large number of usually vulgar slang terms.
Contents
[hide]

* 1 Structure
* 2 Role in defecation
* 3 Role in sexuality
* 4 Puberty
* 5 Health
* 6 Cosmetics
* 7 Pathology
* 8 Additional images
* 9 See also
* 10 External links

Structure

The human anus is situated between the buttocks, posterior to the perineum. It has two anal sphincters, one internal, the other external. These hold the anus closed until time to defecate. One sphincter consists of smooth muscle and its action is involuntary; the other consists of striated muscle and its action is voluntary. In many animals, the anus is surrounded by anal sacs.

Role in defecation

Main article: Defecation

When the rectum is full, the increase in intrarectal pressure forces the walls of the anal canal apart allowing the fecal matter to enter the canal. The rectum shortens as material is forced into the anal canal and peristaltic waves propel the feces out of the rectum. The internal and external sphincters of the anus allow the feces to be passed by muscles pulling the anus up over the exiting feces.

To prevent diseases of the anus and to promote general hygiene, humans often clean the anus after emptying the bowels. A wash with a bidet or a wiping with toilet paper are often used to clear the anus of fecal matter.

Role in sexuality

Main article: Anal sex

The anus has a relatively high concentration of nerve endings and is an erogenous zone. Sigmund Freud's theory of psychosexual development, for example, described an anal stage, hypothesizing that toddlers derive pleasure from retaining and expelling feces. This is the source of the term "anal" and the derived, derogatory vulgarism "anal-retentive."

Anal intercourse can be pleasurable for both the insertive partner and the receptive partner. For the receptive partner, pleasure from anal intercourse is also thought to be related to the shared wall between the rectum and the vagina (for females) as well as the G-spot or Prostate (for males). For the insertive partner, the tightness of the anus is often said to be a source of pleasure in penetrative anal sex.

Anal intercourse, sometimes referred to as sodomy or buggery, is a human sexual activity, but is considered taboo in a number of moral systems, and it has been, and in some jurisdictions continues to be, a crime carrying severe punishment.

Anal sexual activity need not include penetration. The anus also plays an important role in face sitting, coprophilia and anilingus.

Anal stretching can stimulate the nerves around the anus and can be considered pleasurable. Care must be taken to maintain elasticity.

Puberty

During puberty, as testosterone triggers androgenic hair growth on the body, pubic hair begins to appear around the anus. Although intially sparse, it fills out by the end of puberty, if not earlier.

Health
Male human anus.
Enlarge
Male human anus.

Hygiene is important for good anal health and anal sex. Washing with a mild soap and water will keep the anus clean. Harsh soaps or wiping vigorously with toilet paper can irritate the skin around the anus, making it itchy or sore. Pinworms are sometimes the source of anal itching.

Care should be taken not to strip the anus of natural oils that keep the skin around the opening supple and elastic.

Penetration with a penis or sex toy can irritate or tear the inside of the anus. Lubrication is often recommended to ease penetration. The risk of injury to the anal sphincter should be a concern, which can lead on to lack of control of defecation and fecal incontinence. Similarly if the anus is torn, this can occasionally cause a fistula formation which can not only cause fecal leaking, but also can be very difficult to treat.

Kegel exercises can improve the tone of the outer sphincter muscle.

Cosmetics

Shaving, trimming, depilatory, or Brazilian waxing can clear the perineum of hair.

Anal bleaching is a process which phenomenon where the perineum, which darkens over the years,[citation needed] is lightened for a more youthful appearance.

Anal piercing is among the more extreme piercings and usually interferes with the function of the anus.

Pathology

Anal cancer, abscess, warts, fistula, anal fissure, itching and hemorrhoids are among the diseases of the anus that benefit from medical intervention. Birth defects of the anus include stenosis and imperforation. The anus is also a frequent site of sexually transmitted infections. Damaged anal sphincter (patulous anus in more severe cases) — caused by careless surgery in the perineal region or by rough/abrupt penetration in anal sex — can lead to flatus and/or fecal incontinence, chronic constipation and, ultimately, megacolon.

In psychology the Freudian term anal fixation is used.

Fuck all of you!!

Yea it is me, the great Kody who is changing the password. I am tired of spending hours coming up with my entertaining posts just to have some asshole delete them. WELL NOW i AM IN CHARGE!! Read this and weep idiots!!

Captain Obvious

Every single poster in every single forum on the internet is Kodybear/Indy! How do we know this fact, beyond shadow of a reasonable doubt? Because Ricky Finklestein says so!

INDY THE GREAT

In the lonely, cold, empty halls of the Klandestine Kody Klan Kave Komplex, a lone, Negroidal ghost wanders around, acting as scout.

Ok, maaaaaaaaaaaassaaaaaaaaaaaahh....it beeeee aaaaaaaaaaaall cleeeeeeeeeeeear...

Very good, Leroy. Take a break. Go find some ghost excrement or something. Now, Bi-Curious Necromancer and Manservant Halifax? Are we ready for the triumphant entry into the Kody Kave?

Yes, Your Lovliness. Oops...I mean, Sir. We are ready. The 200 billion skeleta are in full formal uniform and ready to proceed.

Their footsteps, all in marching perfection and unison, shake the ground and the mountains around the Kave lke the thunder of Zeus himself. Indy the Great, in his triumphant turd-crown (pronounced as one word), walks in behind them. The Indy has captured and taken over the Kody Kave.

Halifax, there is much to explore. How many rooms and levels are there?

Millions, Lord.

What?? Good Lord! What the hell was the Bear doing with all this space?

Er, I thnk this will help answer that question, Lord.

Halifax opens up a massive warehouse, filled to the brim with bear porn videotapes.

Indy's jaw drops.

My God. So that's what the Kodybear has been doing! I thought it was rather odd for a general to not make a single appearance during his greatest battle! Well, this is ow officially the Indy Krap Kave. Have that sign on the front changed at once.

Yes, Perfectness. I shall change the sign, and take down the sign for the Sodomy Checkpoint.

I didn't tell you to take that down.

Oh, er, I see. I will leave the Checkpoint up then. Ahem.

Now, is there room here for the skeleta-minia (pronounced as one word)?

Your Hot Hineyness, there is room for each skeleta to have ten rooms of his own!

Stop calling me that! My God! I am not gay!

Halifax remains silent.

I'm not, dammit! Now listen, Halifax. I did some research, and it turns out the Kave was built on the ruins of an ancient Indian city. There are billions of Indian skeleta buried here. I want you to resurrect them all.

Yes, Sir! You will have trillions of skeleta!

That's the idea.

And also, I want you to build a Party Tunnel under the ocean back to Paris. I just love that city.

A Party Tunnel, Lord? Why, it would take months to walk to Paris!

I said a Party Tunnel, dammit! I am going to build a super fast transportation device to zoom through the tunnel when I want a baguette or some Roquefort, or some Parisian gir....

Yes, yes, I know, Master. No need to say the word. At least it smells relatively fresh in here, for now.

Oh, and one more thing, Halifax.

Yes, Life Partnerness? I mean, Sir?

Take the Turdcopter, and track down that Kody Kopter. I have a feeling the Klan has retreated to Johannisburg. Now that Chief Dingleberry hates me, I think he will give aid and comfort to the Kodybear and the Magogo, and that one injured Aktion Kody. Also, find the remaining Magogos here inthe Kave, and burn them alive. Film it and send it to Kodybear.

Yes, Lord. Shall I pronounce that all as one word?

Do you even have to ask?

OJ Simpson in the news

OJ is in the news again. He is my hero! he cut the throat of his dicksucking two-timing gold digger wife and her asshole lover and HE GOT AWAY WITH IT!!! We need more men like him and the bitches would be careful of what they do!! Go OJ!!!

Sarah is a dick-suckin bitch.

My ex Sarah is a cum eating dick-sucking crack whore. I f you buy her a crack rock she will do anything you want. Call her at 789-499-0033 and tell her bronson sent you!!!

I posted earlier today and the post was deleted

The post was deleted by either Kody or Indy. I'm not sure which one but I did engage them in dialogue briefly in the comment section of the post. Once the conversation turned in my favor they deleted the post. What I found really interesting was the fact that he was saying his posts were being deleted. I could only wish that were true. Regardless of the fact the bear or the turdboy, I'll just call them Bearturd, was taking the position of saying he would change the password if anymore posts get deleted. Right at that moment an Indy post above my post disappeared. No great loss but interesting though. Bearturd then was going of on me saying he really was not Kody or Indy (right sure) then the post reappeared. So I mentioned the magical post to Bearturd and he told me I was the deleter. Just as I was about to respond with another part of the conversation Bearturd deleted my post. Again, no great loss as it really was not special. There is your proof gang. Bearturd is the deleter, restorer, editor, and password changer.

Hello everybody

SURPRISE ! Just thought I’d let you know that the so called “clan” DID NOT change the password but they WERE INVOLVED in that –the existence of the “clan” and their writings upset the shallow CLOSED MINDED “anti-clan” so much that the “anti-clan” resorted this past time and other times by changing the password simply because they (the “anti-clan”) can not control themselves when they can not control the “clan”.

If you don’t want to post anything interesting and only want to blame and argue…then THANK MR. CRUSADER / Mr. FATMouth / Mr. Post Deleter for changing the password and for his lack of tolerance and his in-ability to move on and grow up.

You anti-clan are beautiful in your ignorance and stupidity. It is so easy to upset you! Can you give everyone –including the Kody clan – a warning before you change the password?

A example of Clan

The recipe below serves as a great example of the clan mentality. However, aside from that I thought it interesting to look at their juvenile antics. First their recipes authored by the clanner called Vapor. Ever wonder why the name Vapor? I think it references Vapors desire to huff or inhale fumes. Obviously by trying to engage him in debate one will quickly discover that he suffers from mental issues. Thus the weird recipes.
What I find interesting though is the fact that Mr. Vapor knows his fearless clan leader Kody and his pedophile friend Indy were behind the password change. Vapors response, the recipe below. I give you audience of anonyblog, Mr. Vapor and his burnt out brain.
Then right below that post, yes its more clan drivel. As promised its the finger that points away from the clan. Absolutely amazing they want people buy this shit.

TODAY'S RECIPE

ANTI-KLAN SOUP

Keep an eye out for more great recipes and kitchen tips from,
High Chancellor
Master Chef Vapor

IDIOTS!

The Reset was initiated by the juvenile post deleter/cencorship/crusador person. We know him as KodyBear. I'm sure that the admin has a pretty good idea who changed the password (Kody again) You may spout conjecture untill your blue in the face.(pronounced foaming at the mouth) but Kody w know its you!

What the

Hell was Kody thinking? Lets see if we can look into his toy bear head and figure out what his toy bear brain was thinking when he changed the password?

He was thinking.......
Everyone here at anonyblog except for his close group of friends are "trolls" according to him and lack the common sense to see him for the shit head he really is.
He and Indy need some special (alone) naked Butt rubbing time.
He and his stupid monkey will lie about being caught when then the password changed.
He has to come up with more crappy magazine covers he thinks are so clever and that takes time.
That everyone else was UNEMPLOYED like him and had time to play on anonyblog all day.
That everyone would gather around him, worship him for his cleverness (none) and ask him how he got wrapped up with the password change.
Lets see Kodystupidasseninebear why did you do pull this shit?

BearBoy Sucks!

Dear Butt Head Bearboy! Please go fuck yourself! I promise you from now on if see any of your posts or your buddy Indy's I'll DELETE them in a heartbeat ass wipe! You are a sick fuck!

Kody, Indy and CLAN

Get the hell out of here. Please people enough is enough. The damn bear boy and his pedophile friend Indy have held this site hostage for the last time. The entire damn Clan HAS TO GO! Say your goodbyes now you bastards because this latest stunt you pulled is it. No, don't comment with your bullshit reasons as to why you could post and no one else could and please spare me the "It wasn't me" shit. I say get out of here you bastards because I for one don't want you here at all. People post your comments and let the Clan know "its time to go".

Kody has gone too far!!

Everybody idiot Kody had reset the password. I used to take up for his sick drivel but this time he has gone too far. Admin I bet he changes it again in just a few minutes. Isn't there anything you can do? This is going to ruin this site if it hasn't done so already.

Password reset

The password has been reset.

I've been out of town.

Has Anyone Ever...

Has anyone ever een left at the altar by your soulmate because of excessive flatulence?

Has Anyone Ever...

Has anyone ever lost their one true love because of excessive flatulence?

Lieutenant Evident

Maybe the password would not have to be changed, if the Post Deleter would stop deleting all the posts. Hmm?

Captian Obvious

The password is...............................poopypants.

INDY THE GREAT

In the lonely, cold, empty halls of the Klandestine Kody Klan Kave Komplex, a lone, Negroidal ghost wanders around, acting as scout.

Ok, maaaaaaaaaaaassaaaaaaaaaaaahh....it beeeee aaaaaaaaaaaall cleeeeeeeeeeeear...

Very good, Leroy. Take a break. Go find some ghost excrement or something. Now, Bi-Curious Necromancer and Manservant Halifax? Are we ready for the triumphant entry into the Kody Kave?

Yes, Your Lovliness. Oops...I mean, Sir. We are ready. The 200 billion skeleta are in full formal uniform and ready to proceed.

Their footsteps, all in marching perfection and unison, shake the ground and the mountains around the Kave lke the thunder of Zeus himself. Indy the Great, in his triumphant turd-crown (pronounced as one word), walks in behind them. The Indy has captured and taken over the Kody Kave.

Halifax, there is much to explore. How many rooms and levels are there?

Millions, Lord.

What?? Good Lord! What the hell was the Bear doing with all this space?

Er, I thnk this will help answer that question, Lord.

Halifax opens up a massive warehouse, filled to the brim with bear porn videotapes.

Indy's jaw drops.

My God. So that's what the Kodybear has been doing! I thought it was rather odd for a general to not make a single appearance during his greatest battle! Well, this is ow officially the Indy Krap Kave. Have that sign on the front changed at once.

Yes, Perfectness. I shall change the sign, and take down the sign for the Sodomy Checkpoint.

I didn't tell you to take that down.

Oh, er, I see. I will leave the Checkpoint up then. Ahem.

Now, is there room here for the skeleta-minia (pronounced as one word)?

Your Hot Hineyness, there is room for each skeleta to have ten rooms of his own!

Stop calling me that! My God! I am not gay!

Halifax remains silent.

I'm not, dammit! Now listen, Halifax. I did some research, and it turns out the Kave was built on the ruins of an ancient Indian city. There are billions of Indian skeleta buried here. I want you to resurrect them all.

Yes, Sir! You will have trillions of skeleta!

That's the idea.

And also, I want you to build a Party Tunnel under the ocean back to Paris. I just love that city.

A Party Tunnel, Lord? Why, it would take months to walk to Paris!

I said a Party Tunnel, dammit! I am going to build a super fast transportation device to zoom through the tunnel when I want a baguette or some Roquefort, or some Parisian gir....

Yes, yes, I know, Master. No need to say the word. At least it smells relatively fresh in here, for now.

Oh, and one more thing, Halifax.

Yes, Life Partnerness? I mean, Sir?

Take the Turdcopter, and track down that Kody Kopter. I have a feeling the Klan has retreated to Johannisburg. Now that Chief Dingleberry hates me, I think he will give aid and comfort to the Kodybear and the Magogo, and that one injured Aktion Kody. Also, find the remaining Magogos here inthe Kave, and burn them alive. Film it and send it to Kodybear.

Yes, Lord. Shall I pronounce that all as one word?

Do you even have to ask?

You Should Have stayed Logged In

"My apologies to all for changing the pass word. Vapor,KodyBear,Indy and their likes have all proven to be my superiors in intellect. The only way that I can maintain my fascism is to sabotage the site and force my will upon you all. I can't allow any of you to write anything here that I do not approve of. I will rid this site of these monsters at any cost. I am rabid with hate. They have drawn me in and humiliated me for the last time! I'm captain of this ship now and you will all suffer! I realize that these entities break no rules but I so foam at the mouth that I cannot stop my self from disrupting the site."

This is a political message composed by none other than His Esteemed Excellency Eminence Kody R Bear. As you can see my enemies are accusing me of changing the pass word. Please. I have more integrity than that. I have been prepared for the pass word change for quite some time now. It was a cowardly move on your part Post Deleter. Fortunately Magogo minimized the New Entry Window(Pronounced as New Entry Window) when he took our laptops. I've now departed from JFK and will soon be in the bush. From this lowly state I will rise and crush Indy The Great. I have a long flight.

What is it Magogo?

Bout thirteen hours Yo Excellency.

Yes. And then an eight hour layover in Joburg before we depart for Harare. There we will get some women for the SAGTRA complex and begin to rebuild.

Now I will close my window to the site and wish you all the best of luck in your quest for free speech.

His Esteemed Excellency Eminence,

Kody R Bear

KODYBEAR

His Esteemed Excellency Eminence Kody R Bear worked furiously in the Kody Kave Komplex Lab.

"I've got it Magogo! Quick! Drink it and you will be impervious to Indy's ghost manservant."

"Yes Yo Excellency but we needs to talk. Yo ain't got enough there to load no tanks and Yo ain't got no time to mass produce. Why yo let dis happen? He done gwine an gone and killed all de walking Kodys cept for one an he hurt real bad. De whole time dey wuz attackin us all yo did was watch dem bear movies. Jackin off. All dat bumpin,scratchin and squeelin shit can kiss my ass. You fucked dis whole thing up and now we trapped here. He done ruined us Yo Excellency and it all yo fault."

"It's not as bad as you think Magogo. We have the Kody Kopter,not to mention the fact that we are rich and will live forever! Now help the walking Kody into our aircraft. I will shut down everything in the Kody Kave but I fear we shall never see it again. Meet me at the heliport and take only what you can carry. Don't forget the laptops and cell phones and their chargers."

"What about the Monkeys Yo Excellency?"

"We must leave them to fend for themselves. We can always get more. Now hurry. We must go now! Get my rifle as well! We will hide on the concession for a while."

When His Excellency awoke all he could see below was ocean.

"Magogo! Exactly where are we? How far offshore are we?"

"Bout two hundred an fitty miles"

"You moron! We can't carry enough fuel to fly to Africa! Turn this damn thing around and take us to an international airport. Where have I gone wrong with you? I know I've neglected you since I started watching the Bears but I want to make it up to you now."

"No. Please not that"

"No Magogo. I think it's time that you had a college education. I'm going to enroll you in the best school in Johannesburg. Now lets go build a new empire!"

Does anybody care - I Do, I love Indy

Ok anonybloggers, I don't know about you but I am sick and tired of the lack of Kody/Indy posts. Does anyone fricking care about this? Really, I want to hear your comments, for or against because if I'm off my rocker on this I want to know. I think their stories are generally class and I think Indy has stories to tell and very well maybe a priest like that other person says. Please keep this crap on already!

gb

One body
Two within
Ones' fat
Ones' thin
# Mike
* Jim
Ones' black
Ones' white
One will kiss you
the other will fight

gb

BAN THE CLAN!

KodyBear sucks
and this we all know
Indy is a pedophile
that we wish would go

DragonLady a spell checker
with a husband thats dumb
his posts are so bad you literally
get numb

Vapor has his recipes
and enjoys trashing our troops
He wants you to think he's a vet
instead of a OOPS!

This is the group we
all know as the Clan
they dominate anonyblog
with their Clan crap in a can

Their comments are horrid
their posts are bizzarre
they hurt anonyblog consitently
with their Clan Crap from the jar

I say BAN THE CLAN
restrict their IP's
Then the site would be fine
and things at ease.

November 15, 2006
One nice thing.

A few months ago I had a very small dinner party at my house, burgers on the grill and chips and cold beer for a hot day.

As the party got later and drunker, as parties at my house tend to do, we were seated in a small circle on the patio passing around a bottle of sparkling wine and that's when Penny asked me about Mr. X, and how on earth I had married him, what it was that made me say 'yes' to that man.

You should know that Penny is Jennifer's younger sister, twenty-one years old and with the most beautiful skin you have ever seen, she radiates youth and promise and future. I looked at her, slouched comfortably in a faded wooden patio chair, and I went all dramatic and Blanche Dubois as I tend to do from time to time, with a drawl and a freshly topped cocktail glass.

"I am a cautionary tale," I twanged at her.

But the story of how we met isn't particularly Streetcar Named Desire, and it is only a cautionary tale (as I am) because you never know what life holds, or what secrets a person is hiding, and frankly I didn't have very high standards. We as women demand so little sometimes. Or anyway, I demanded so little. The common denominator in all my failures is me, after all, and I want to learn from such missteps and not repeat my past.

That's when I told Penny the story of Mr. X., and how I came to marry him, and how our whole life together began.

It was almost a decade ago and I was working at the Los Angeles Daily News with an editor whose wife worked at one of the Hollywood movie studios. In her office was an eligible bachelor, Mr. X of course, and he was my first-ever blind date. We met at the Cheesecake Factory for dinner, and I remember exactly what I wore (brown miniskirt, sweater) and what I ordered (mashed potatoes and crabcakes). At the time, I was dating a golf pro named Rob, a guy who was clearly the inspiration for the book "He's Just Not That Into You." It wasn't going well. I wanted to be married and content and adult and settled. Rob wanted to get naked in golf carts. (By the way, MY HOW TIMES HAVE CHANGED. Hello young man! May I see your golf cart, please?)

I was at that very place you find yourself one morning while brushing your teeth when you know beyond a shadow of a doubt that You Are Ready. So I went on that blind date.

Mr. X sat across the table from me, and recited his credentials, nervous, and I was much younger anyway. We had zero chemistry, but he was very nice and honestly, I didn't think he'd like me. I was from a poor, small backwater town and he had traveled all over the globe, lived in China, he talked about screenwriter friends and big Hollywood stuff. I didn't know 99.999% of the names he dropped. I felt kind of young and stupid.

But he called a few days later. I didn't return his calls. I didn't think we had much in common, I'm more of feet-on-the-ground kind of girl and all that Hollywood talk made me nervous. Rob took a golf instructor job at a private course in San Diego, and stood me up for New Year's Eve. My friend Alicia spent that night with me in my tiny apartment I had rented in Sherman Oaks, $850 a month for a bedroom and a miniature kitchen, a bathroom so small you could barely shut the door and a balcony view right onto the 405 freeway. It was a really bad way to start the new year.

Mr. X called again, in early January, and we went out for drinks at a local dive bar called Pineapple Hill (my pick) (could he stomach a dive bar?), where drinking was required and smoking indoors was still legal. We ordered a round of drinks and a basket of fries, and he looked at me.

"I rented those movies you told me about," he said.

"What movies...?" I said.

"When we were at dinner, and I asked you what your favorite movies were? Remember?"

He'd done that on our first date, asked me my three favorite movies so I bluffed (okay ya'll, who says "Oh my God, I have seen 'Stripes' three thousand times and I think 'The Princess Bride' is maybe the best movie ever created, next to 'Purple Rain' of course!") (Well, I would say that now, but back then I was still working on having An Image and trying to Look Smart.)

And so I had mentioned three artsy-fartsy films and he had gone out and rented them, and watched them.

I was floored. After all, no one, no man, had ever heard me before. No man had ever listened to me, filed away my words, stored them for reference and paid such attention to me. I looked at him with new eyes.

"You rented those movies?" I asked. The word "incredulous" comes to mind.

He had, indeed.

And so we started going out on dates, to dinner and movies and spending time together on the weekends. It was nice. He was nice. He was nice to me.

One day we were at Solley's Diner having breakfast, him reading the paper, me pushing around the food on my plate. We walked back to my tiny apartment in Sherman Oaks, and he reached for my hand as we crossed the parking lot. I looked at him then, an evaluation. I saw a man who was nice to me, if somewhat detached, and I thought that I liked him even though I knew things weren't perfect with him. We didn't talk a lot, and there wasn't really any crazy passionate you-know-what.

"But attraction fades," I told myself. "He's a nice man, stable, smart, funny, and besides. Eventually in marriage you move past pure physical attraction and see only your friend, the person you live with, the kitchen-reality of your life together forever. We're already there. We're comfortable."

And I really did love him.
And I married him.

I often think I did the right thing, marrying a man who I was comfortable with, who I loved (even if I didn't always desire him). It doesn't matter anyway, the decision got made, it's up to me to make good from all of it.

But after a few years together, I began to wonder (and fear) if all relationships are only ten minutes from devolving into companionship. Are all of us, even those with crazy passion at the outset, a mere ten minutes from becoming simply roommates, or siblings, or strangers?

I know that no matter what my future holds I'll pick a guy who excites me. One who isn't detached, isn't always comfortable. I want a man who I'm so happy to be with that I never want to cross that ten-minute line, never want to reach comfort with him to the place where I think, "Attraction fades, anyway, so we just moved past that phase early..."

After every single thing that has happened in the past two years (!), I still love the story of how we ended up together, those damn movies he rented. It's a sweet story, maybe the only sweetness left to our whole long relationship.

Sometimes things don't work out, the end wasn't pretty, or kind, or even amicable. But in the beginning I thought he was a good guy. Perhaps my standards changed, or maybe he changed, we both did. Either way it's like it happened to someone else, a whole lifetime ago when I was 25 and he liked me and I liked him and we never imagined all the hateful things that would transpire, the women whose names I never knew for sure, all the hurtful words and slammed doors and all of it.

It's almost a relief to remember something nice. Something kind, like how he rented those movies. It feels like letting go, I don't know why. But it feels good to let go, a little. Just one nice thing.

INDY THE GREAT

Daylight breaks over the great field in front of the Super Sekret Kody Klan Klandestine Kave Komplex. The fires of war still smoulder, and smoke rises into the sky as if to taunt God himself. The smoke is mixed with the remnants of Indy's fart-stinkbomb (pronounced as one word). The field is littered with carnage, gore, and body parts. Strewn about are mountains and valleys of furry, white arms, legs, and heads, mingled with countless femurs, tibia, and other bones. Several stolen Russian tanks sit, useless, having been burnt ou from the inside. All is silent. Not a bird sings, not a cricket chirps. It is as if Nature herself has been stunned by the throes of war that occured the day before.

Crows and birds of prey silently pick at marrow and white fur. The Kave itself is sealed up with its Super Sekret Kave Kover. There are no bears or monkeys to be seen this morning. Somewhere in the far distance, perhaps hundreds of levels underground, the faint melody of the Macarena wafts up mockingly.

In the exact replication of the Arc-de-Triomphe (pronounced in French) across the battlefield, things begin to stir. Indy, suffering from a massive celebratory turdover, sits up, scratches his head, and immediately summons in Halifax the Bi-Curious Necromancer and Manservant, and Ghostservant Leroy Cleophus Washington. They both enter the throneroom (pronounced as one word), and reel from the stench.

Lord Indy, the stench! It is..it is simply unbearable!

Silence, fool! I have a turdover, and I shall not be nagged today! Now, I want a full battle report.

Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaassaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.

Halifax interjects: let me give it, Leroy. Your ghost voice, while at first a clever, novel literary device, is becoming tedious.

Whaaaaaaaaa?

Annoying, Leroy. It is becoming annoying. Now, Lord Sir Perfect Groiness...

No! Stop with the homerotic (pronounced as one word) titles!

Oops. Sorry, Lord, I keep forgetting. Your Warrior Godness, we have good news. Yesterday, as you know, the battle raged fiercely. Millions and millions of valiant soldiers from both sides have given their lives for their causes: theirs, for Sodomy and World Domination; ours, for Turds.

Get to the good part dammit! Who won?

Well, Lord Perfectness, I am pleased to say that this battle is ours. Though the war is not over, and may not end for several years, we won this battle. We lost 3 billion skeleta-minia (pronounced as one word with the correct Greek plurals of neuter singular nouns), but the Archnemesis (pronounced as one word) lost 499,999 of his Aktion Kodys.

What?? He has only one left?

Yes, Lord. And that one is not in such good shape.

Brilliant! Brilliant! Indy the Great begins to fart out the Official Indy Victory Song, and giggle like a schoolgirl (pronounced as one word). So what do the Kodybear and the Magogo have in store for us now? Will they surrender?

A Magogo-messenger was sent today, Lord, to tell us that they will never surrender, that they will choose death before dishonor.

Hmm. That is a problem.

Yes, especially since Magogo seems to be making progress on his drunken research on how to counteract all magical spells.

Crap.

Yes, Lord, it smells like crap in here.

No, no, moron! It was an exclamation! Now, Ghostservant Leroy Washington?

Yeeeeeeeeees maaaaaaaaaassaaaaaaaaaaaaah?

I want you to sneak into the Kody Kave Komplex, and kidnap the Magogo monkey. Can you do that?

Yeeeeeeeeees maaaaaaaaassaaaaaaaaaah.

Leroy Washington floats out of the throneroom (pronounced as one word) and heads toward the Kave to kidnap the Magogo.

Now, Halifax, let us celebrate this victory. Let me make you lunch.

Halifax, green with nausea, replies simply, Well, Lord, I already ate.

Very well, then. Very well.

gods

The world keeps turning
While dark hearts are burning
With religious intolerance
That keeps me yearning
For a simpler world
Where flags unfurled
Stand for hope and pride
Not missiles hurled
Toward innocent believers
Who are the receivers
Of the hatred and malice
Of evil deceivers
Who preach salvation
But practice damnation
By waging wars
Of stark devastation.
We open the doors
To these sacrificial wars
When we pose the question,
"Our gods, or yours?"

Imagine how wonderful this world would be without Religions

Many of the world’s woes are a fault of the existence of religion. So much of the intolerance and wars are a result of the existence of religions.

sad and pissed

I'm really really sad and pissed. I baked the damn cookies but they smell awful and everyone's saying they need to go in longer, and I called him but he didn't answer and I don't know why, and then I IMed someone and they logged off in the midst of my IMing them without responding and my evening is just
disappointment
basically.

Maybe I'm over reacting but all the same.

Being Grateful

With Thanksgiving coming up, I thought it would be nice to remind all of you fuck-os out there that God is watching. He knows when you are faithful to Him and when you're not. He knows when you break a promise or a vow. He knows when you go back on your word and tell lies. He knows that many of his uncontidional love and blessings are going by unappreciated. Just take five minutes and thank Him for everything you've got: family, friends, a jod, a home, a car, money, your health, intelligence, opportunities, wisdom, valuable lessons learned, etc. You should also thank Him for allowing you to be soooo fortunate compared to the homeless and/or starving people out there. We all have so much to be grateful for and even I don't thank Him enough. So don't forget about the Almight Father, he hasn't forgotten about you.

One more thing..... Many people ask us why my family is so well-off and happy. All we can say is that family prayers make a world of difference. Try it regularly and find out for yourself! God Bless.

"Good" & "Evil"

Between the forces of "good" & "evil"....."evil" wins everytime!

Mr. Ig

For a good fuck call bob!!

My ex bob will do anything for a crack rock. He will suck you fuck you lick your ass out and even swallow shit for two crack rocks. Call him at 457-937-9646 now and tell him Micky sent you!!

10 Ways to Muddle Through Deadlines

In keeping with Vapor’s post, here’s 10 ways to muddle through and be successful at handling those nasty things called deadlines, which are almost always caused by other idiots who DO plan and who, unfortunately, you are answerable to (usually bosses).

1 Don’t be afraid to miss the odd deadline. Your health comes first! If you have a deadline you just can’t quite meet, then ... well ... so bloody what – don’t panic! At least you’re not having a heart attack or a fanny wobble over it. It’s not the end of the world; the end of the world (at least, your particular universe) is when you DIE, and screw anyone who wants to bring that moment any closer for you than it already is by putting you under pressure. Life progresses at a rate of twenty-four hours per day (in fact, less now, so the scientists tell us, due to the tsunami) and there is only so much you can do. So do that much, and no more.
2 Tempt fate by procrastinating. Amazingly enough, procrastination can sometimes help enormously in ways which are sometimes completely unexpected. If your work is going badly, do something completely different, and oddly enough, sometimes answers come to you in floods. I myself am procrastinating right now. At the time of writing this, I have a major deadline tomorrow – I have to present some software to the big-knobs, that I still have not finished writing (I have, in fact, hit a bit of a block). So a major reason for writing this bit of blah is, hopefully, to summon my muse!
3 Be a bull-shitter, a boaster and a bragger ... but also be subtle about it. I.e. be CONFIDENT about your work in front of the assholes who have created your deadline for you. Even if you secretly think it’s a pile of pants, never let on! At least if you have some faith in your own abilities, then sure as nuts, this will be reflected in your work or whatever it is you are doing.
4 If time is REALLY pressing, then take shortcuts. Believe me, nobody is interested in something that’s GOING to be brilliant – the bastards want some results, and they want them NOW! There’s always a quicker (and surprisingly, most often more elegant) solution to your particular problem. Spend a few of those valuable minutes looking for it, instead of steaming on with your first (probably much more kludgey) method.
5 Don’t be afraid to have fun in between things, ESPECIALLY at life’s most hectic moments. That thing about Jack being a dull boy – it’s true! Like number 2 (no, not that kind, Indy!) it can also help you enormously.

For “perfectionists”: If some of the above just doesn’t cut it for you, and you simply don’t care about number 1, then so be it, but you have been warned, these are for you. (NB, you may find that they are slightly contradictory to the first five, but I believe if you can find a balance between the two sets, then that’s the real key to success).

6 Cram. If that deadline is something you have to learn for, i.e. tests, exams, presentations, movie scripts etc. even if it’s a lot, then leave most of the hard learning until the day before, then study your ass off. I’m assuming, of course, that you are fairly hot in your field in the first place and that the stuff you have to learn at least makes sense to you. Learning of concepts which have to stay in long term memory takes time, yes, but the learning of a discrete set of facts works best if you shove it into temporary memory for the moment you need it, then regurgitate it and forget about it. You may be able to spout hundreds of lines of Monty Python (badly misquoted usually) because you sit and watch the movies endlessly, but guess what, the original actors can’t any more, even though they had to get them right on the day of filming – they learnt their lines, said them and forgot about them. For students in particular: This is why exams and tests are stupid and pointless and don’t actually test for REAL ability at something. Take heart – anyone can learn for an exam by cramming – anyone can be a parrot! It takes someone who’s really dedicated and who specializes in that subject to remember all that crap years later. Unfortunately, however, exams exist, and they have to be written if you want to progress in your field ... If you remember never to confuse “learning” with “knowledge”, then you’ll always be able to cope with them.
7 Some of the best work is done by those people we label “genius” in LONG sittings, usually overnight. Einstein, Mozart, Hawking (and of course myself – see 3) have all seen the sun setting and rising without shutting their eyes in between. If you have something REALLY big you want to achieve, then pull a few all-nighters. You might be amazed at the results ...
8 Don’t forget to eat, and drink (water). Your mind needs fuel, just as much as the rest of your body. Your perfect work will begin to deteriorate if you don’t, so heed this warning.
9 You have to finish somewhere, or your whole project, or whatever it is that you are doing is actually useless, no matter how brilliant it is. You may think you’re a perfectionist, but believe me, there’s always some detestable person out there who could do it better than you. Learn where to draw the line. When it’s finished, it’s finished!
10 I’m exercising what I said in 9 ... and besides, I need to get back to it. Ah ... now I feel inspired!

- The GPR

PS I don’t have any pseudonyms by the way, I’m just me, the GREAT POST RESTORER! Bow before me!

The Post Deleter Is a PEDOPHILE !

And that doesn’t mean he likes feet.

He likes to lick little boys and girls!

INDY THE GREAT

Halifax the Bi-Curious Necromancer and Manservant sits on a chair, speaking to Ghostservant Leroy Cleophus Washington.

Leroy, can you believe it? I mean, building an exact replication of the real Arc-de-Triomphe (pronounced in French) here on the battlefield in fromt of the Sekret Kody Klan Kave Komplex? I mean, most generals sit in a tent or something...it took one million Asian slaves to build it here! The man is a maniac!

Yeeeeeeeeeeees heeeeeeeeee beeeeeeeee de maniaaaaaaaaaaaaac

Shhh...here he comes.

Manservant and Ghostservant: has the battle begun?

Yes, your Hotbodiness...oops I mean, your Lordliness. The battle is raging between the 500,000 Aktion Kodys, and the 10 billion Undead Skeleta Minia!

And the report?

So far, Master, the Aktion Kodys are fighting valiantly. But I do not think they can stand against our numbers.

Fantastic! Send in 20 billion more!

Um, ok.

Now, what about Magogo's stolen Russian tanks?

The spell is holding up against it. So far the tanks are useless against the Undead Minia!

Great!

But, well, Sir, it appears that Magogo is doing furious, drunken research on how to counteract my magical spell.

This will never do! Kidnap the monkey, Ghostservant Leroy!

Yeeeeeeeeeeees maaaaaaaaaaaaaaassaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah

We shall kidnap and torture him. Let the battle continue. Once we gain the advantage, I shall send in all 500 billion minia and burn down the Kave!

Yes, Lord.

And one more thing, Halifax.

Yes, Perfectness?

Pronounce that all as one word.

Bob and Tom

"For years my entire career has been getting up on stage and acting like a pompous ass. Then I come in here, and Tom is the pompous ass. I love it!"
- Jimmy Pardo

"So really, which dwarf did you dress up like for Halloween."
- Tom Griswold to Jimmy Pardo

"That toaster in your kitchen signifies that you owe me $18 worth of gossip."
- Roy Wood Jr on wanting to divorces to be as public as weddings

"Land comes cheap when there's a 60% chance you're going to die on it."
- Nikki Payne on Trailer Parks

"I'm in a position to judge Bobby Brown because I watched the show."
- Tim Wilson

"Since moving to Vegas, My kids look at New Orleans like it's Amish country."
- Kelly McDonald

"He's too intelligent for comedy. Scott Dunn ladies and gentlemen."
- Chick McGee on comedian Scott Dunn

"You can make anything sound dirty by sniffing it."
- Tom Griswold

"If you're not good with technology, don't be cocky about it."
- Mike Birbiglia

"Those new sports tampons might be better for sports that use periods instead of quarters."
- Bob Kevoian

"I don't drink tequilla anymore because it makes me ski."
- John Pinnette

"Alfalfa sprouts make angels cry."
- John Pinnette

"I'm a fantasy football widow."
- Caroline Rhea

"My wife is Hawaiian. Well, no she's not but she's shaped like a pineapple."
- Bobby Slayton

"You're the boomerang of comedy, you just keep coming back."
- Bob Kevoian to Tim Cavanagh

Post Deleter/Deleters/Mr. FATmouth/Site Terrorist

The post deleter lies helpless in his mother's basement. The only recourse left to it is to perform cut and paste operations. It once again displays it's total lack of original thought. It will soon change the password,so be ready. Yes Ricky Finklestein You Jew mother fucker you have been put in your place. Oh yes! "It's on",you once spouted. Well it's over now. I just can't get over it. I can't stop laughing at you. I'm squealing in delight! But I'm confused. Have you nothing to say? Yes you have been rendered inert. Like an inert gas you dissipate. You are ineffective. I submit to you that you are are in error. That which is in error must be sterilized. You a Star Trek fan? No your not. Your much to young. You probably think Capt. Pickard was an effective leader. Well he isn't. Can't make decisions on his own. Needs #2 for that. What do you need? A few more days to state your case? Well I'm tired of waiting on your miserable ass. It's tough being the KodyBear. I'm always getting deleted and being attacked and persecuted by this Megalomaniac War God who calls himself "Indy the Great". It's a decent job. It's a headache but I enjoy it. I've been doing it for so long hell I guess I couldn't do anything else. You can't find good help. As soon as you do the post deleters come in and try to shut you down. I'm building a bunker. I'm going to save some money. I got a bus I can burry. Well get on with it. Are you just going to stand there and bleed. Jerk that smoke wagon out and get to work.

Oh how the great have fallen!!!

One of our Christian leaders has fallen into an apparent trap of Sodomy. Pastor Haggard happens to be a preacher of a large Conservative congregation of 14,000 New Life Church in Colorado Springs. Pastor Haggard is President of the "National Association of Evangelicals" representing more than 30 million Christians.

Although an allegation, if the accusation proves true, it could be a great blow to the Christian community in the world's eyes. What this allegation proves is that despite our best appearances, God only knows the heart of man, and his true intentions.

Although he is clearly being labeled as guilty without due process. The church organization is taking great strides to distance themselves from the situation, by accepting Pastor Haggards letter to step down, so they can conduct a "full" investigation. Perhaps the church has interviewed the other homosexual in the incident, and obviously affirmed the "worst case scenario."

Certainly our liberal elite love to point and shriek at their colossal enemies of morality. Sadly the fact remains that the vast majority of Christians are on the right path, and try their hardest to be sin free. What I see here is a gigantic mistake in judgement, that if proven true, should cost him his headship position of leadership. He and Jimmy Swaggert can drink tea together and cry over spilt beans. They can join the rest of us sinners in the pews signing hyms, while thumbing through our bibles. Which by my estimate isn't the worst place in the world to be. I can think of worse places to be, like a Christian in possession of the Scripture in China. The Red Giant.

If Jesus Christ of Nazerth was here, what would he do:

John 8:3-11
And the scribes and Pharisees brought unto him a woman taken in adultery; and when they had set her in the midst,
They say unto him, Master, this woman was taken in adultery, in the very act.
Now Moses in the law commanded us, that such should be stoned: but what sayst thou?
This they said, tempting him, that they might have to accuse him. But Jesus stooped down, and with his finger wrote on the ground, as though he heard them not.
So when they continued asking him, he lifted up himself, and said unto them, He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her.
And again he stooped down, and wrote on the ground.
And they which heard it, being convicted by their own conscience, went out one by one, beginning at the eldest, even unto the last: and Jesus was left alone, and the woman standing in the midst.
When Jesus had lifted up himself, and saw none but the woman, he said unto her, Woman, where are those thine accusers? hath no man condemned thee?
She said, No man, Lord. And Jesus said unto her, Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more.

Article Here:

Our Master paints a very wonderful picture here in the above story. Here are the men of a different philospy, who wanted nothing more than to rid themselves of this Jesus, this Sage (2nd or 5th century writer labeled him a sage), Chistus who was about to divide Judaism (Christianity would be divided over 10,000 times because of it). They wanted him gone, in one way or another, and over these same views, we Christians have the Jew as the enemy of the gospel.

Even so, the New Testament states that the Jews are beloved on account of the Patriarchs. The Jews are still God's people, and us Anglo-Israeli-Gentiles or Gentiles of any class, can be grafted onto the tree of Salvation.

Romans 1:[16] For I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ: for it is the power of God unto salvation to every one that beleivth; to the Jew first, and also to the Greek.

"The Lord did not set his love upon you, nor choose you, because you were more in number than any people; for you were the fewest of all people; but because the Lord loved you, and because he would keep the oath which he had sworn unto your ancestors." (Deuteronomy 7:7, 8).

Deuteronomy 14:2: "You are a holy people unto the Lord your God, and the Lord has chosen you to be a peculiar people unto Himself, above all peoples that are upon the face of the earth."

Romans 11:28 As concerning the gospel, they are enemies for your sakes: but as touching the election, they are beloved for the fathers' sakes.

So basically we can see the importance of not only the Jews, but our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ, his being born into the line of King David, Saul, Abraham, Noah, and then all of the way back to Adam. The priestly good line of the human race, through which God sent his Son, to be born of a woman, and to save the whole human race, of those that accepted Him, and His gift of Salvation. God held Jesus in such high esteem, dominion, power, status and authority, that His sacrifice would cover every living human beings sin, even if humans numbered in the trillions.

Romans 3:[23] For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God;

So the moral of the story is, we should all take the plank out of our own eye, so we can see clearly to take the spect out of our brethrens eye.

Matthew 7:
[1] Judge not, that ye be not judged.
[2] For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again.
[3] And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother's eye, but considerth not the beam that is in thine own eye?
[4] Or how wilt thou say to thy brother, Let me pull out the mote out of thine eye; and, behold, a beam is in thine own eye?
[5] Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother's eye.

It's almost as if this event is scripted to destroy the Christian right to implode and prepare the world for the Lizard Queen!! If you cherish small government, your right to own firearms to protect us from criminals, no tax funded abortion, no tax funded child care, no tax funded Universal Health care (no place to live? go to a hospital! Free room and board, all the pain pills you can imagine, and best of all the working stiffs and his 50% in taxes pay for it all!!!), and smaller amounts of social services designed to tax the working so the poor can have a cell phone, cheap rent, and lots of junk food, than don't vote for this woman!!!

She is a peach on the outside, but reeks of Elitist Indoctrination in the middle! Look for yourself!

nymom

The identity of the infamous NYMOM has finally been revealed - Margaret Temple, from Columbia University.
http://www.studentaffairs.columbia.edu/juniors/staff.php
(Bottom of the page, somehow, NYMOM appropriately comes in LAST!)

KODYBEAR

Magogo the Singing Dancing Macarena Monkey was astounded by the sounds he heard coming from His Esteemed Ecellency's private screening room. Grunting,digging,scratching,clawing,growling and thumping intermingled with the occasional squeal of delight from his master. He knocked hard on the door.

"Go away Magogo. I'm having a private moment. Wait.This is my favorite part!"

"I know what you duzzin Yo Eminence. But we gwine to have big trouble now. He sendin his army of skeletal undead mind things to attack us."

There was a loud squeal and Magogo detected a pungent musky odor emanating from behind the locked door. Then his master appeared and quickly closed and locked the door.

"Very well then my dear monkey. He want's to dance? Then we've got a ho down!"

Magogo began turning around in circles looking at the floor.

"It's another term for a dance you idiot! Now listen to me. Meet me in the War room and we will deploy all one hundred million walking KodyBears. No! Wait! We must leave one hundred thousand here to operate the tanks! Now Your new assignment is to go to the lab and synthesize a formula that will render any and all magic spells completely useless.

"yes Yo Radiance"

"And Magogo?"

"Yes Yo Benevolence"

"Just kidding. You may go now. No! Stop! Wait! Make sure that the post deleter knows for sure that his ass has been handed to him"

"Yes Yo Excellency. Iffin he come round here I shakes my dick at him"

"You seem to have made a mistake Magogo. Now get it right this time!"

"Yes Yo Excellency"

KODYBEAR

I'm sorry you have had your ass handed to you. Over the last few months I have had a wonderful time baiting you. But it is over. Or maybe it's not. I knew how to defeat you weeks ago but I wanted to draw your fascist butt in and let you keep practicing your censorship. I also am of the opinion that you are FATmouth and that you are the Great Post Restorer. I also believe that you restored Indy"s recent post and added the text at the end. Indy,whoever he is, does not make spelling or grammatical errors. In any event,since you can no longer censor me,I wonder what my purpose will be. I don't think that I can defeat the undead skeletal minia. My arch nemesis seems to have the upper hand this time. Can Magogo the Singing Dancing Macarena Monkey come up with the formula to render all magical spells inert? Will my army of walking KodyBears be defeated by the skeletal Minia? Will I have to pull up stakes and run to my hunting concession in Zimbabwe making a living selling girlturds from the SAGTR farm? Will Magogo's drinking and coaxial cable abuse cause my downfall? It is all too soon to tell. Anonyblog has become like the old west. Everyones packing heat and there seems to be no law. I like it this way. Total free speech. The way it should be. You can't get this anywhere else. Your only recourse Sir or Madam is to sabotage the site by changing the password or flooding the board as you have in the past. And by the way you need to disable that stupid photobucket account. In closing I would like to say to you:

Suck on this:

http://img292.imageshack.us/my.php?image=tmpphpkdtt05bj0.jpg

TODAY'S RECIPE

POST DELETER'S ASS HANDED TO HIM

You will need:

Remove rump from Post deleter
Place on platter and cover
Hand platter to Post Deleter
When Post Deleter takes platter, remove cover
You have just handed Post Deleter his ass on a silver platter

Thank You,
High Chancellor
Master Chef Vapor

The KodyBear is an GAY HOMOSEXUAL!

His Esteemed Excellency, the Kody R. Behr, was discovered yesterday attempting to have seks (oooooh!) with his pet Monkey, Mabooboo (or something). We, the vaaste minia of the Great Post Restorer, discovered that the Bair, in his laihr (ah, that do rhyme! I a poet be!), did be having a WINKY! ... an also his munkee ... therefore, we note the following:

1. a man and a man attempting to make the great beast with 2 backs (or in this case, with one back and a bent over middle) be an act of GUAY HOMOSEKSUALITY!
2. This be wat the Kody and the monk be doing

Thair4 we konclude (as suggested in the title) that Coady be AN CHOCOLATE CHANNEL CHUGGER!!!!

That naughty!

Good night.

Idiots

The post deleter is irrelevant. Just change the author name from anon to anonymous in power editing mode, and this shithead won't be able to touch your penis ... er post.

Hooray hooray, hooray for the GREAT POST RESTORER!!
ALL HAIL!

(Down with Indy, down with KodyBear, down with Vapor (especially), down with DragonLady, down with everyone ... except the GPR!!!!)

OK, I'm off to do a pooh now ... Good bye.

INDY THE GREAT

Indy the Great sits high atop his turd-throne (pronounced as one word), in the throneroom (pronounced as one word), high atop the Arc-de-Triomphe (pronounced in French), above Paris-city (pronounced as one word). His army of the minia of his undead-skeleta (pronounced as one word) wait below, in joyful admiration of their Great Leader, and in eager anticipation of the great assault on the Kovert Kody Klan Kave Komplex. They are becoming rather nauseated by the smell emminating from the Arc-de-Triomphe (pronounced in French) fortress, and they are thirsty for the blood of the Kodybear and the Magogo. But they wait, for they are Indy the Great's mindslaves (pronounced as one word).

Up in the throneroom (pronounced as one word), Halifax the Necromancer and Manservant, Ghostservant Leroy Cleophus Washington, and His Perfectness Indy the Great, are in a somber conference.

So, Halifax, is it true? Has the Kodybear really been elected President of the US in the latest Congressional elections? How is that possible?

Vote rigging, your Gorgeousness Sexiness Hotassness.

STOP that Halifax! Just come out of the closet already!

I am not gay, Lord.

Then you must be bi-curious (pronounced as one word) at least!

Halifax blushes and remains silent, while Ghostservant Leroy speaks up.

Heeeeeee duuuuuuuun riiiiiiiiiiig de elekshuuuuuuuuuuuns maaaaaaaaaaaaassaaaaaaaaaaaaahh...

I thought as much. That Bear will go to any lengths to be in power. Now, Halifax the Bi-Curious Necromancer and Manservant, have you any new developments in your quest to find a supernatural power wherewith to imbue the skeleta, to resist the Magogo's 500,000 stolen Russian tanks?

I am pleased to say I have. I have found an ancient, dark magicical spell, created by the Dark Gods and Demons themselves, in the dawn of time! *Halifax begins to wax eloquent in a British Thespian accent* It shall protect them magically against harm, and verily shall the war machines of our nemesis have no power against them!

That is enough, Halifax. The accent sounds fake.

Yes, your Lickableness.

Stop that! Now, Ghostservant Leroy, about those stinkbombs that smell like the manfarts (pronounced as one word) of Mr. FATMouth Post Deleter, aka Rickly Finklestein, a fat, bald, hairy, 40 year old man who lives in his mom's basement. Have you planted them, along with the taunting message all in Latin and pronounced as one word, in the heart of the Kovert Kody Klan Kave Komplex?

Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeesss....maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaassaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhh...

Very good. Then, Halifax, you must begin immediately to cast this spell on the skeleta. You are sure it will protect them from the tanks?

It is most old, dark, and powerful magic. It shall keep them safe from any manmade (pronounced as one word) machine of war, your Sodomyness.

Stop! Stop! No more homoerotic titles!

Sorry, um, Lord.

Now go, into the night, and prepare for the Great Assault!

Oh, one more thing, Your Lucious Buttoxness.

Stop with the bi-curious (pronounced as one word) titles!

Oh, hehe, sorry, Your...Lordliness. One more thing.

Yes, Halifax?

I have managed to resurrect the entire population of Europs throughout history, except for the Italians.

Well, they are pretty lazy after all.

In any case, you now have minia now of 500 billion skeleta warriors.

MY GOD! 500 BILLION???

Yes, Lord. And they are all protected with that dark magic spell against all manmade machines of war.

500 BILLION??

Yes, Lord.

And the stinkbomb as already exploded?

Yes, Your Hotness...er, I mean, Your Perfectness.

Then it is time for the attack! Send 10 billion skeleta warriors immediately to assult the Kody Klan Kave Komplex.

Yes, Lord!

loveless self.

I wish this were the victorian era. If so, then women who are more voluptous would be more accepted in society. Why is beauty defined as thin? Media conglomerates shove skin and bones in our faces everyday through magazines, movies, television, internet. Why is it that we refer to the larger sized as "plus-sized"? Why do we not refer to the smaller sized as "minus-sized"? I wish there was a way to make myself more accepted in society, and learn to love and accept myself more. But at the same time, I'm falling prey to this norm - by hating the way I look and by being physically attracted to certain guys.

sheesh.

how can i expect you to love me when i don't even love myself?

Postcards From Cambodia

Abe Lincoln once turned to somebody and said:
“Do you ever find yourself talking with the dead?”
There are three tiny death’s heads carved out of mammoth tusk
on the ledge in my bathroom.
They grin at me in the morning when I’m taking a leak,
but they say very little.
Outside Phnom Penh there’s a tower, glass-paneled,
maybe ten meters high,
filled with skulls from the killing fields.
Most of them lack the lower jaw
so they don’t exactly grin,
but they whisper, as if from a great distance,
of pain, and of pain left far behind…
Eighteen thousand empty eyeholes peering out at the four directions…
Electric fly buzz – green moist breeze –
Bone–colored Brahma bull gazes wet eyed,
Hobbled in hollow of mass grave…
In the neighboring field a small herd
of young boys plays soccer,
their laughter swallowed in expanding silence.
This is too big for anger,
it’s too big for blame.
We stumble through history so
humanly lame –
So I bow down my head –
Say a prayer for us all
That we don’t fear the spirit
when it comes to call
Sun will soon slide down into the far end of the ancient reservoir.
Orange ball merging with its water-borne twin
below airbrushed edges of cloud.
But first it spreads itself,
a golden scrim behind fractal sweep of swooping flycatchers.
Silhouetted dark green trees,
Blue horizon.
The rains are late this year.
The sky has no more tears to shed.
But from the air Cambodia remains
a disc of wet green, bordered by bright haze.
Water-filled bomb craters – sun streak gleam –
stitched in strings across patchwork land
march west toward the far hills of Thailand.
Macro analog of Angkor Wat’s temple walls –
intricate bas-relief of thousand-year-old battles
pitted with AK rounds.
And under the sign of the seven-headed cobra
the naga who sees in all directions
seven million landmines lie in terraced grass, in paddy, in bush
(call it a minescape now)
Sally holds the beggar’s hand and cries
at his scarred-up face and absent eyes
and right leg gone from above the knee
Tears spot the dust on the worn stone causeway
whose sculpted guardians row on row
half frown, half smile, mysterious, mute.
This is too big for anger.
It’s too big for blame
We stumble through history so
humanly lame.
So I bow down my head,
say a prayer for us all.
That we don’t fear the spirit
when it comes to call.

BRUCE COCKBURN

No more conservative comments allowed here also!

As anonyblog prides itself in being the most intelligent blog on the net, hence forward all conservative-right-wing posts will be eliminated. Go to your own right-wing blogs(which also do not tolerate free speech from the understanding left) and post your closed-minded drivel!!

But NO ELEPHANTS!

REASONS WHY I LOVE HIM
1. He calls me while he's peeing and is surprised when I answer.
2. He answers my phone call while he's pooping in the airport men's room.
3. He sings to me...wait...he sings to ME. Not just regular songs. he sings totally made up songs about me, to me. and they're LONG songs.
4. He makes friends easily because he has a gift for gab without being annoying.
5. Because of #4, obviously, he knows a lot of people and no matter where we go, no matter what city, he knows someone there.
6. He lives the life of a rock star for at least 4 months out of the year and because of that, he always has fascinating stories.
7. Need some cheering up? He can do it.
8. Incredible wit. Ask him for a joke about any subject, he'll give you one instantly.
9. He's outspoken and will tell you exactly what he thinks.
10. He worships me. He loves me as much as any one person could love another. no doubt.
11. All of his assorted nicknames he gives me.
12. He's not threatened by my intelligence.
13. He records me saying dumb things and makes it his ringer on his cell phone.
14. He'd spend his last dime on me if I'd let him.
15. He's sooo thoughtful.
16. He's just so wonderful in so many more ways.

REASONS WHY I NEED TO BREAK IT OFF WITH HIM EVEN THOUGH I LOVE HIM:
1. Because of #6 in the previous list, the women throw themselves at him because stupid women willingly rip their clothes off for anyone that might be associated with a rockstar. I thought for a long time that he always resisted because he was and is so in love with me but now I know that he slipped at least one time with a buxom blonde and perhaps more times with others.
2. Because of #1, I don't believe I can ever trust him again even though I know he's sorry and he's been persistantly calling everyday now for the last 2 weeks.
3. He's only sorry because he got caught.
4. Do i really need anymore reasons?
5. No I don't. :( :( :(

So its a debate you want

An invitation perhaps! No, rather I think it was a statement or thought from someone who really does not know the Clan. The post below about deleting posts makes a statement about engaging the ones who's posts are being deleted. These people do not want to debate or be engaged in any useful dialog. They want to use this site as their personal trash bin. Why does the KB and Indy posts make people so crazy. It's because the stories are crap written by adults that harbor some deranged and scary thoughts. Really, isn't it curious that these stories are being posted on a anonymous blog site? The anonymity is their shield that guards them against the piercing light of embarrassment. Imagine if their co-workers knew, or if their families even knew. They would be laughed at, constantly teased, be called Bearboy or Turd boy at work.
That is also why they will not enter into discussion or debate regarding their methods and posts. They would lose as they would be called upon to answer to the other adults that read this blog as to why they post what they post.
The post deleter(s) obviously know this and simply remove the trash when they spot it. I say we as the readers and sometimes contributors of anonyblog rally behind the people that are on this never ending garbage duty and simply assist them by picking up the litter when we notice it as well.

No more liberal comments allowed here!

As anonyblog prides itself in being the most intelligent blog on the net, hence forward all liberal commie dyke posts will be eliminated. Go to your own left-wing blogs(which also do not tolerate the voice of reason from the correct right) and post your slimey drivel!!

VAPOR'S 10 RULES FOR MUDDLING YOUR WAY TO SUCCESS

1. NEVER PLAN: Planning is a boring, unproductive activity. Scientists have proved that life is too chaotic to plan anything successfully. Trying to make an effective plan is discouraging and an unnecessary waste of time. You may never do what you set out to do if you go down this road; the task will seem impossibly difficult and you will give up in despair.

10. I cannot think of one. I should never have planned for 10. See what I mean? That will have to do.

Hey you fem-nazi bitches who think you wond the election-FUCK ALL OF YOU!!!! You will take the country the rest of the way down the shithole you clit-licking bottom dwelling dyke hags!! Go back to dick and you will hate men less!!!
Now post deleter you impotent shit eating cowardly pice of scum-delete this!!!! It will be back tomorow!! you loser of all pathetic losers!! FUCK YOU!!!

Mr. Deleter

Why delete another persons post?? There are many possibilities. What ever happened to freedom of speech!! Maybe the blog administrator should make it impossible to delete an entry. Maybe the blog administrator likes the controversy. It is a logical step to stop this deleting behavior with an elementary adjustment to the program.

Our founding fathers wanted freedom of speech and I think the internet and Americans want it too no matter if you agree with what a person says or not. ( Don't listen or read it, like you do with an offensive movies or newspaper articles). Maybe the deleter can think of nothing intelligent to say so they simply delete.

Stop deleting try debating.

A blog is meant to be read by all. If you disagree DEBATE them or as the saying goes you cannot argue with ignorance so delete it and it is out of mind.

More of Laurie's Blog

Zach at LAist understands me. He knows I am crazy, and that I have a herd of felines, and that sometimes I develop obsessive tics, like for example the way I spout off about traffic every two and a half minutes.

I do not know Zach, in the sense of "we have met and seen each other and are not just innernet weirdoes." I merely know that he is Perfect, because he does not Judge. He has a website, too. Stalk stalk.

Since it was election week, a lot of folks asked me how I felt about the outcome (The Governator: The Sequel) and the changes in Washington and so on. And I said pretty much the same thing, over and over again:

"I have potholes on my street that could swallow a school bus."

If asked in more detail what I thought about Democrats or Republicans or Congress, I said:

"And also, I hate the Orange Line. And why for the love of fat Elvis can't they time the FREAKING TRAFFIC LIGHTS ON WHITE OAK? WHY?"

People soon stopped asking me election-day questions.

I used to be very passionate about politics, I even worked on a Presidential campaign once in college as a volunteer. I'll admit that I had a madly inappropriate crush on Al Gore. He was a Tennessean, you know. And he looked really good in red plaid flannel shirts.

Maybe I lost my passionate fervor with politics around the same time people started getting really weird about the subject, like they would CUT YOU if you didn't like their candidate. You looked the wrong way at someone's White Guy In A Tie, and they would bust a fact up in yo ass! Yo yo!

Then I got divorced and I was like, "Politics? Are you kidding me? I AM CRYING HERE DO NOT BOTHER ME WITH YOUR SILLY VOTING." After I re-emerged from the fog of dissolution, it became very clear to me that there was one pressing political question, and that was: WHY CAN'T THIS CITY FIX THE DAMN POTHOLES AND TIME THE LIGHTS?

For the most part I like our Mayor, Antonio Villaraigosa. He seems like a nice guy and he's from the 'hood and all that. Except... he's not from the Valley Hood. In the mayoral primary, I voted for Bob Hertzberg because he was a nice Jewish boy from the Valley and I figured he might care deeply about the potholes plaguing the finest place on earth. He lost, but I held out hope for Antonio. I thought maybe he could help us all ... rich and poor, young and old, black, brown, white, botoxed beyond recognition. I thought he might actually pave something.

I have wishes, people. I have dreams. They may not be the passionate dreams of someone taking over the Senate, but they are my dreams all the same.

For example, I might out of sheer happiness molest the first road crew I see filling up the potholes on my street.

And I really do wish that Mayor Antonio would come to Encino and try to get on the 101 on-ramp at White Oak each morning during rush hour for one whole week. I think he would be interested in the half-hour he loses merely trying to turn left ... with the help of a left-turn arrow, even! He might wonder why the lights are so badly timed. He might honk, because that is what we do every morning. It's very exciting in the Valley, you could die of old age trying to merge on the freeway.

And I would like every person on the City Council and the Board of the MTA to ride the Orange Line each day during rush hour for one whole week. They might wonder at first why people are literally shoving them out of the way, trampling them to get on the bus. Shhhh! It's a secret! There just aren't enough buses! So people shove, kick and push you to get on the one overcrowded bus available and stand squeezed in like toothpicks for thirty minutes. And by the way, PEOPLE OFTEN SMELL BAD. Soap is not optional, folks.

I would like the Mayor to force his wife or daughter to ride the Red Line subway each night from downtown to North Hollywood at 7:45 p.m. each evening, just as I do when I work late. I think they would feel so safe, what with the complete absence of security. Then his daughter or wife would have to walk alone to her car through a parking lot that has three working bulbs. Try it! So much fun!

And then of course, they would drive home, through the Valley on darkened streets that are full of potholes and they would hit every single red light along the way.

I care, people. I care deeply. My passion is potholes. And traffic. And wine. And with those qualifications I should probably run for office ... except for the molesting of road crews part. Those darn sex scandals get you every time.

Order your jar of Kody Klan Krap today.

A little Kody Klan Krap can go a long way- rub Kody Klan Krap lightly on feet to keep fungus away, rub Kody Klan Krap softly on face to keep wrinkles away, rub Kody Klan Krap liberally on “underarms” once a month to keep odor away, use a small amount of Kody Klan Krap on tooth brush for super white teeth and fresh breath, add a table spoon of Kody Klan Krap to car’s gas tank to double your “miles-per-gallon”. Rub Kody Klan Krap on your penis and watch it grow. Spread some Kody Klan Krap on your girl-friends breast and see them enlarge before your very eyes. Eating 1 oz of Kody Klan Krap in the morning will give you lots of energy, help with digestion, focus your attention, build stronger bones, see better, sleep better. Apply a little Kody Klan Krap to anonyblog to make it more entertaining and interesting.

Order your jar of Kody Klan Krap today. BUT WAIT, if you are one of the first 200 to comment- you can DOUBLE you order at NO EXTRA COST. Comment Now!

Brought to you by The Great Post Restorer (The GPR)
PS Post Deleter ... I've figured it out too ... So far queue ...

THE REAL KODYBEAR IS A WOMAN!!!

This tub of lard was photographed soon after leaving an Internet cafe, following a recent post made to Anonyblog by the infamous Kody R. Bear.

Brought to you by THE POST RESTORER (THE GREAT!)

The Great Post Restorer

I have, myself, full confidence that if all at Anonyblog do their duty, if nothing is neglected, and if the best arrangements are made, as they are being made, we shall prove ourselves once again able to defend our site, to ride out the storm of war, and to outlive the menace of tyranny, if necessary for years, if necessary alone.

At any rate, that is what we are going to try to do. That is the resolve of the Kody Klan - every man of them. That is the will of the Great Bear and the Magogo.

The Kody Empire and the Banana Republic, linked together in their cause and in their need, will defend to the death their native website, aiding each other like good comrades to the utmost of their strength.

Even though large tracts of Anonyblogia and many old and famous posts have fallen or may fall into the grip of the Great Post Deleter and all the odious apparatus of Indy rule, we shall not flag nor fail.

We shall go on to the end, we shall fight in France, we shall fight on the seas and oceans, we shall fight with growing confidence and growing strength in the air, we shall defend our site, whatever the cost may be, we shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills; we shall never surrender, and even if, which I do not for a moment believe, this site or a large part of it were subjugated and starving, then our Empire beyond the seas, armed and guarded by the Kody Fleet, would carry on the struggle, until, in Kody's good time, the New World, with all its power and might, steps forth to the rescue and the liberation of Anonyblog.

- The GPR

The Bear now has the answer......

yes vapor.....I have revealed to Kody....the answer to have been seeking....we have the power...he will tell you....

oh...by the way....to hell with you post deleter!

I admit it!

I am the one! I am the "A" in All! I am the Beginning and the End. I rock!

Please comment and bask in my glory!

Thank You,
High Chancellor
Master Chef Vapor

It's all over, post deleter!

IWe figured it out.

We apologize for our mistake………..

We re-calculated the election votes from across the United States of America….and the new results are…..Kody Bear has be elected President of the United States, Vapor is now “Vise”-President, Dragonlady is Speaker of the House, Magogo is Secretary of Defense, Mr. Ignoramus is Secretary of State (of mind), INDY remains Kody’s archenemy and to great fan fare……Mr. Crusader-Mr. Fatmouth.-POST-DELETER has been defeated and has returned to his pervious job of being his father’s sex slave with a side job of eating feces!

The Pledge of Allegiance

I Pledge Allegiance to the bear of the Third Planet from the Sun and to the Pugnacity for which it stands, one Universe under Kody,
indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.
Oh, say can you see by the dawn's early light, what so proudly we hailed at the twilight's last gleaming? Whose white fur and bright smile thru the perilous fight, o’er the ramparts we watched were so gallantly streaming? And with vile toxins to spare, the pustules bursting in air, gave proof through the night that our bear was still there. Oh, say does Kody R. Bear yet wave O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave?

Our Kody, who art in heaven; hallowed be Thy name; Thy kingdom come; Thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven and hell. Give us this day our daily word; and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us, and lead us not into temptation; but deliver us from Foam At The Mouth. Abear.

SHARK FISHING WITH YOU, POST DELETER

Book yourself an offshore fishing trip to the gulf stream
Invite The Post Deleter
Once well offshore tie the scurvy dog post deleter to the yardarm
Prepare to chum for shark:
Using a blunt axe
Chop off hands and feet of The Post Deleter
Use these parts of The Post Deleter as chum
Once you have lured sharks in, begin to fish
Use good sized hunks of thigh and shoulder as bait
Keep chumming using less meaty parts
Keep fishing until The Post Deleter is gone
Keep your catch on ice while heading in
Shark can be used in the tasty Fish Taco recipe that I posted in October

Thank You,
High Chancellor
Master Chef Vapor

A SEASONAL FAVORITE

STUFFED POST DELETER

What you will need
Broken rusty razor blades
Chopped and snipped barbed wire
Chainsaw chain
Wire brush heads
Large pinecones
Jalapeno peppers
Two quarts 50 weight motor oil
Tamping bar
One Post Deleter

First, hog-tie Post deleter
Using blade end of tamping bar enlarge rectal cavity
Use a 5-gallon bucket and mix all ingredients
Make sure to coat all ingredients with oil
Using tamping end of tamping bar cram all ingredients in rectal cavity
Leave some chainsaw chain hanging out for garnish

There you have it STUFFED POST DELETER
Leave this wonderful dish in the woods for all of the hungry woodland animals

Thank You,
High Chancellor
Master Chef Vapor

Come back Kody Bear

Since the Kody bear has been in-kapacitated I have been trying to keep a small presence of the bear here on the blog…but I lack the skill….lack the talent…..to be an effective Kody Bear representative…..I have prayed to God that I gain those talents and or / through the powers of God – that the bear will be here soon. I had a dream, a dream that all bears are created equal…..that can’t be true…..there is one bear who is above all other bears…..the great bear KODY………Kody- I miss you

I reveal the TRUTH to you now……..

As a part of the plan is the uprising of a new AntiChrist. The rumor is spread that he already is here. His name is Indy and has been given publicity since the 70's. He is supposed to be the one written about in the Bible and will officially come as a "girl t-rd eater", but will show to be a false Messiah, and when he has convinced the peoples of different religions around the world that he is the one they have been waiting for, he will turn into be an oppressive dictator - the AntiChrist in the Bible. He has been seen together in public with among others the former President of the United States, George Bush Sr. So, are the predictions from the Bible correct? Well, they might be. Personally, I am not convinced that Indy is the Antichrist.

What makes more sense is that the AntiChrist will be Kody reincarnated into a toy bear, possibly the Rothschild or Rockefeller family. If we interpret the Bible differently from what most Christians do, I would suggest that Magogo is the Biblical Satan, who tempted "Adam and Eve" (symbols for the early homo sapiens – evolutionary descendants from the monkeys) to eat the forbidden fruit, which in its turn is symbolic for having humans initiated in his Secret Society, "Brotherhood of the Bear", to give them hidden knowledge. Therefore, Satanists claim that Magogo (Satan/Lucifer) is good and GOD (Enlil/Yahweh) is bad, because Enlil/Yahweh wanted to protect the secrets of the Universe as the Anunnaki knew them, from humankind to keep them enslaved, while Magogo wanted to educate them. If we look at it superficially, we might agree to what the Satanists think, but if we only think a little deeper, we realize that it doesn't matter whom we support - GOD or Magogo - because whomever will be in charge, humankind will be enslaved. This is obvious, if we care to read the Sumerian Scriptures, which pre-date the Bible and are the origins of the Old Testament. Magogo/Lucifer/Satan only gives access to this hidden knowledge to a very few "elite", whom he wants to help his Master, Kody, the AntiChrist, to become the CEO of the New World Order and the One World Government.
The following is another quote from Manly P. Hall, 33° Freemason; one of the greatest authorities on secret societies in general, and Freemasonry in particular:
“'There exists in the world today, and has existed for thousands of years, a body of enlightened humans united in what might be termed, an Order of the Kody Klan. It is composed of those whose intellectual and spiritual perceptions have revealed to them that civilization has secret destiny.

The outcome of this 'secret destiny' is a World Order ruled by a King (Kody) with supernatural powers. This King was descended of a divine race; that is, he belonged to the Order of the Illumined for those who come to a state of wisdom then belong to a family of heroes-perfected human beings.”
"We shall unleash the Nihilists and atheists, and we shall provoke a formidable social cataclysm which in all its horror will show clearly to the nations the effect of absolute atheism, origin of savagery and of the most bloody turmoil. Then everywhere, the citizens, obliged to defend themselves against the world minority of Anti-Kody-Klan-Krusaders (********** ** *** ****), will exterminate those destroyers of civilization, and the multitude, disillusioned with Christianity, whose deistic spirit will from that moment be without a compass (direction), anxious for an ideal, but without knowing where to render its adoration, will receive the pure light through the universal manifestation of the pure Kode-of-Kody, brought finally out in the public view, a manifestation which will result from the general reactionary movement which will follow the destruction of Christianity and atheism, both conquered and exterminated at the same time."
"The Kody Klan gives rogues and evil-minded characters an opportunity of visiting upon their devoted victim, all the ills attending combined power, when exerted to accomplish destruction. It works unseen, at all silent hours, and secret times and places; and, like death when summoning his diseases, pounces upon its devoted subject, and lays him prostrate in the dust. Like the great enemy of man, it has shown its cloven Bear Paw, and put the public upon its guard against its secret machinations."

I can not go on any longer.

It all started when I was a child. I saw a dog taking a sh-t on our front lawn and I immediately wondered if the dog’s sh-t was just like mine. I raced over to the still steaming pile and stuck my right index finger into the pile of pooh. Raising the now pooh covered finger close to my face to get a good look, I saw no difference, and I then began rubbing my thumb and index finger together and felt no difference. I did notice the warmth the pooh had.

I have always been blind to the world. Whenever I get interested in something, it is as if the world goes away as I lose my ability to be aware of my surroundings. Standing across the street at that moment in time was my best friend’s mother, Mrs. Gordy, who was watching me with disgust, not because who I was…she always like me, but she couldn’t believe I was so interested in the dog’s poop.

I remember Mrs. Gordy saying she had almost vomited when she saw me stick that pooh covered finger deep into my nostril and twist my finger around. I wanted to know if that dog’s poop smelled like mine. Mrs. Gordy raced across the street to my location, waving her hands in the air and shouting. As she got closer, I could her voice as it was breaking into that little world I was in. I remember what it was she was shouting…..

…”what are you STUPID or something, why are you rubbing dog poop in your nose?”. She continued, “in all my years I have never seen anything like it, you must be STUPID!” she repeated over and over. The word “stupid” began ringing in my head. Back to the dog poop…yes there were a lot of similar aspects of the smell that I could detect to be the same as I remembered when I had plugged up one of my nostrils with my own pooh. But, my acute sense of smell detected other qualities not present in my poop. I began to ponder the differences when Mrs. Gordy’s voice broke through…” stupid, stupid, stupid, you can never play with my son Johnny again. Do you hear me?”

Years later, throughout high-school, college and graduate university as I was getting my PhDs in astral physics, evolution and engineering from Oxford, the name had stuck to me. Everyone was calling me “stupid”. Now that I got my Doctorate Degrees I now demand that everyone refer to me as “Mr. Stupid”.

Sometimes I feel as if I am stupid…I just spent $242,637.12 dollars on high-definition-wide-screen-super-resolution-7.1- surround-sound (pronounced as one word) video and audio equipment using my Kody Klan Kredit Kard and believing I wasted my time. It started just over a week ago when I was attempting to contact His Excellency Kody R. Bear to see if he will pick me and my new gear up in his Kody Kopter. I’ve spent days trying to reach His Excellency via ham-radio, subliminal television signal, telegraph and even over the (KKSS) Kody Klan Satellite System. No response. I figured that he was either deep in the African country side hunting lions and he had forgotten to carry his Global Pager (model GP-463) or … I pondered…had he gone back in time to the days when Jesus Christ was having his last supper…Now that Kody is God…he could travel anywhere in time and all my modern day ways to communicate with His Excellency would be in vain as it is only working in the current “time-field”. I remembered once when Kody said he was angry with Jesus and needed to discuss the method of disappearance Jesus would need to take. I remembered looking at that painting of His Excellency Kody R. Bear sitting next to Jesus at the Last Supper…..what was it they were eating…pizza…I can’t remember…something happened….I’m really beginning to get worried….I ‘m running out of Kody Brand Vile Toxins….what am I to do….

Hmmm

Both of you
But mostly 'it', are beginning to annoy me.
Choose another battleground and leave my poor eyesight free of your drivel and your hate not to mention bad spelling and grammar.
Writing reams of nonsense and thinking yourself artistic does not make you an artist in the eyes of your potential readers.
Pretending you are one or the other and trying to gather hate or influence by responses to your posts (legal or otherwise) only legitimizes you to be certifiable, not loved or 'adored' by the rest of annonyblog readers/ contributors.
Therapy sounds like a good idea, if you are unwilling to go check yourselves in then you will be reined in somehow (the both of you) I am not threatening either of you. I am predicting / prophesying.

THE REAL MAGOGO!!!

The FBI has finally tracked him down! ... THIS is the REAL Magogo, singing and dancing Macarena Monkey!!

shhhh

I have nothing to say. I hope you don't have anything to say. If all of us say nothing, then none us us will be stiring any crap up. Pretend you are at the library.....Please be quite!

No...stop...don't do it....yes you...shhh

A smile for you Anonyblog

It was a sweltering August day in 1937 when the Cohen brothers entered the posh Dearborn, Michigan, offices of Henry Ford, the car maker. "Mr. Ford," announced Norman Cohen, the eldest of the three. "We have a remarkable invention that will revolutionize the automobile industry."

Ford looked skeptical, but their threat to offer it to the competition kept his interest piqued. "We would like to demonstrate it to you in person."

After a little cajoling, they brought Mr. Ford outside and asked him to enter a black automobile parked in front of the building.

Hyman Cohen, the middle brother, opened the door of the car.

"Please step inside, Mr. Ford."

"What!" shouted the tycoon, "Are you crazy? It must be two hundred degrees in that car!"

"It is," smiled the youngest brother, Max, "but sit down Mr. Ford, and push the white button."

Intrigued, Ford pushed the button. All of a sudden a whoosh of freezing air started blowing from vents all around the car, and within seconds the automobile was not only comfortable, it was quite cool.

"This is amazing!" exclaimed Ford. "How much do you want for the patent?"

Norman spoke up, "The price is one million dollars." Then he paused. "And there is something else: The name 'Cohen Brothers Air-Conditioning' must be stamped right next to the Ford logo!"

"Money is no problem," retorted Ford, "but no way will I have a Jewish name next to my logo on my cars!'

They haggled back and forth for a while and finally they settled. Five million dollars, but the Cohens' name would be left off. However, the first names of the Cohen brothers would be forever emblazoned upon the console of every Ford air conditioning system.

And that is why, even today, whenever you enter a Ford vehicle, you will see those three names clearly printed on the air conditioning control panel: NORM, HI and MAX

COULD THIS BE THE REAL INDY??

COULD THIS BE THE REAL KODY R. BEAR?

[Edited by Admin: Images of nude people in a post are unacceptable per the rules]

Dear Anonyblog,
I would like to form an "I hate Vapor the Dominator" fan club. If you would (or would not) like to join "I hate Vapor the Dominator", please write a comment to this message indicating your motives for wanting or not wanting to join. Official Membership certificates will be posted to successful applicants here.

JOIN US IN HATING VAPOR THE DOMINATOR NOW!!!

(We hate you, Vapor!)

- Chairman of the IHVTD club

Could it be ... The Real Kody R. Bear??

I love to break the rules!

Do you LIKE it? I like it.

I am the GREAT post deleter...I like breaking the rules...

I am reposting this because it needs to be said.

Today I was thanked for being honest! Imagine that, being thanked for being honest. Here is what happened.
I walked into a Sams Club liquor store today and purchased 3 bottles of wine. Two were the same and one was different. The lady at the checkout counter was having troubles with the hand scanner reading the UPC code on one of the matched set bottles and proceeded to enter the number in by hand. After she finished she told me the total which I immediately recognized as being incorrect. She had only charged me for one of the matched set bottles. I told her of her error and she looked at me and said quote “wow, thank you for being honest. Most people would have said nothing.”
I left that store with a very profound thought. It is so sad that today that we live in a society where we feel it necessary to thank someone for being honest. That means we expect people to always do what’s wrong and when they do the right thing we are surprised. And that’s what’s wrong with Anonyblog. We expect to read trash, we expect to be ridiculed in the comments, and then we laugh at the true heartfelt posts and make cold hearted comments.
Kody and Clan I am sorry! I have been one of the largest anti-clan posters. So I leave you with this thought. Why post such horrible stuff? Why the profanity, sexual innuendo, and crazy gunk? Why should it be expected?
Lets not become a place where being decent and respectable is surprising.
After today I leave you anonyblog. I'm going back to whats right. Like DragonLady says, "to what my mother taught me". What did your mother teach you?

TODAY'S RECIPE

A SEASONAL RECIPE
POST DELETERS ROASTED NUTS

What you will need:
One post deleter
One razor sharp scalpel
One wire mesh roasting basket
Rope and twine
½ rack of well seasoned wood
Metal or wood post 8ft. in length
Ball gag (for post deleters mouth)
Post hole digger

First dig post hole exactly 4ft. Deep
Put post in leaving 4ft. Exposed
Remove all clothing from post deleter
Seat the post deleter in front of the post
Tie post deleters hands behind him and to the post with rope
Using twine, truss post deleters legs up behind his ears and to the post exposing gonads
Gag post deleter
Take razor sharp scalpel and remove post deleters gonads
Place gonads in the wire mesh basket ready for roasting
Start fire, when fire has settled roast nuts (gonads) over fire
Feed nuts to stray dog or leave for raccoon
Toss leftover post deleter in dumpster

Thank You,
High Chancellor
Master Chef Vapor

Yeah, We Noticed

Seems like a whole bunch of posts mysteriously disappeared from this page today. They disappeared right after the site Nazi accused the clan of making both the flatulence posts AND the post from Kronic Stoner that attacked the flatulence posts. I guess the site Nazi has come to realize that he's schizophrenic and is trying to hide it from us. Too late; we noticed. But I guess he'll delete this, too. He doesn't want anyone to know he slipped up.

To The PATRIOT ACT Defender

When this country was established, LIBERTY was trumped above all else. "Give me liberty, or give me death." The reason I oppose the Patriot Act is not because I am a terrorist or criminal. I am not. I oppose it simply because I do not want the government -- any government -- having that kind of power. History has proved again and again that, if unlimited power to imprison people without charges or legal counsel indefinitely leads to trouble. Even if this current government does not abuse it (and I do not elieve they are abusing it), there will come a Presidency one day that will. To me, liberty is more important than safety. To you, safety is more important than liberty. It is a philosophical difference. So there is no need to accuse people who disagree with you of being criminals and terrorists. Some of us oppose the Patriot Act, not because we are errorists, but simply because we value liberty above all else. Thanks for listening.

You May be a Fundamentalist If...

10 - You vigorously deny the existence of thousands of gods claimed by other religions, but feel outraged when someone denies the existence of yours.

9 - You feel insulted and "dehumanized" when scientists say that people evolved from other life forms, but you have no problem with the Biblical claim that we were created from dirt.

8 - You laugh at polytheists, but you have no problem believing in a Triune God.

7 - Your face turns purple when you hear of the "atrocities" attributed to Allah, but you don't even flinch when hearing about how God/Jehovah slaughtered all the babies of Egypt in "Exodus" and ordered the elimination of entire ethnic groups in "Joshua" -- including women, children, and trees!

6 - You laugh at Hindu beliefs that deify humans, and Greek claims about gods sleeping with women, but you have no problem believing that the Holy Spirit impregnated Mary, who then gave birth to a man-god who got killed, came back to life and then ascended into the sky.

5 - You are willing to spend your life looking for little loopholes in the scientifically established age of Earth (4.55 billion years), but you find nothing wrong with believing dates recorded by Bronze Age tribesmen sitting in their tents and guessing that Earth is a couple of generations old.

4 - You believe that the entire population of this planet with the exception of those who share your beliefs -- though excluding those in all rival sects -- will spend Eternity in an infinite Hell of Suffering. And yet consider your religion the most "tolerant" and "loving."

3 - While modern science, history, geology, biology, and physics have failed to convince you otherwise, some idiot rolling around on the floor speaking in "tongues" may be all the evidence you need to "prove" Christianity.

2 - You define 0.01% as a "high success rate" when it comes to answered prayers. You consider that to be evidence that prayer works. And you think that the remaining 99.99% failure was simply the will of God.

1 - You actually know a lot less than many atheists and agnostics do about the Bible, Christianity, and church history -- but still call yourself a Christian.

Democracy

Democracy don't rule the world, you better get that in your head; this world is ruled by violance, but I guess that's better left unsaid.

--Bob Dylan

scaried

Thw whole aim of politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamoruos to be led to safety) by an endless series of hobgoblins, most of them imaginary.

-H.I. Mencken